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Author Topic: MLC Monster REPLAY

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MLC Monster Re: REPLAY
#100: September 10, 2013, 05:38:11 AM
Hi Anjea, thank you for your response. I fear too that my H has done too much damage, and that I've done too much damage by trying to fix this, and telling him lots of stuff, sometimes not too kind! And he will never come home. He's not interested right now,, he has said so...
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M:1994
BD: 31st Dec 2012..Happy New Year!
"I want a new love, I want to take risks, I want a new relationship with the kids"...thanks, what's wrong with the one you had???

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Re: REPLAY
#101: September 10, 2013, 05:21:44 PM
My dear, when his crisis is over he will not recall most, or anything, of what you have told him. Don't worry about what you have said. It is done.

Your BD was less than one year ago. For most MLCs that is a very short time. The reason he is not interested is not because you said some less nice things, it is because he is having a MLC.

All MLCers say they will never come home. Most do. Or would if the LBS took them back.

Now Albatross, if only one manage to let our MLCers know that all it is required is that they love themselves...  ::) ::) ::) Sadly it does not seem to be easy to make them get such a simple thing.
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Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)

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Re: REPLAY
#102: September 10, 2013, 08:28:41 PM
Quote
They have no love for themselves so they cant love anyone else or anything else.

So when they don't feel anything for their children or LBS, and even ignore their once loved pets, then they can't love OW/OM either, confirming the infatuation, and feeding their addiction?  Love and OW/OM have nothing to do with each other.
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Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.

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Re: REPLAY
#103: September 10, 2013, 11:33:16 PM
Quote
They have no love for themselves so they cant love anyone else or anything else.

So when they don't feel anything for their children or LBS, and even ignore their once loved pets, then they can't love OW/OM either, confirming the infatuation, and feeding their addiction?  Love and OW/OM have nothing to do with each other.

Exactly.
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Re: REPLAY
#104: September 11, 2013, 02:06:27 AM
Anjae, thanx for that, I'm really despairing with him, though I told him yesterday I wasn't part of his weird fantasy life anymore and I was now looking after myself. And hoped he'd come to his senses before it was too late, of course, no reply! This was after I was kindly told I didn't do it for him anymore, didn't find me attractive, even though I looked great???? Mad stuff! And after 3 guys at a party hit on me, in front of him! Including a very gay friend of mind who said he was now going straight when I walked in. And total non reaction from H. I would have hit the roof if it was the otherway around. Nice to get the compliments, but truly am not interested! That hurt me to say the least.
Albatross, your posts are really interesting and give good for thought! And Snowdrop, it's nice to read your logical explanation of the ow none sense, nonetheless they are attracted to them, not us, very hard.
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M:1994
BD: 31st Dec 2012..Happy New Year!
"I want a new love, I want to take risks, I want a new relationship with the kids"...thanks, what's wrong with the one you had???

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Re: REPLAY
#105: September 11, 2013, 02:19:00 AM
This was after I was kindly told I didn't do it for him anymore, didn't find me attractive, even though I looked great?

That's BS. It's either projection or him trying to make you feel unattractive and break your self esteem so that you don't get too flirty with others... ;)
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'Nothing worth having comes easy'
BD oct 1st 2012. 2 teens- 2 Dogs. Together 16 years, not married. No OW in sight. Foo issues a go-go.

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Re: REPLAY
#106: September 11, 2013, 02:22:22 AM
Quote
That's BS. It's either projection or him trying to make you feel unattractive and break your self esteem so that you don't get too flirty with others... ;)
I agree with Booboo - they are trying to keep everything/everyone in the same place as before, PG.

Quote
So when they don't feel anything for their children or LBS, and even ignore their once loved pets, then they can't love OW/OM either, confirming the infatuation, and feeding their addiction?  Love and OW/OM have nothing to do with each other.
I love your reasoning, Snowdrop.  I am going to add that to my list of things I read daily  ;)

xxx
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Re: REPLAY
#107: September 11, 2013, 02:27:14 AM
It's quite obvious really...If they are incapable of feeling the unconditional love they have for their own children how on earth can they feel any love of any kind?

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'Nothing worth having comes easy'
BD oct 1st 2012. 2 teens- 2 Dogs. Together 16 years, not married. No OW in sight. Foo issues a go-go.

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Re: REPLAY
#108: September 11, 2013, 02:45:43 AM
It's quite obvious really...If they are incapable of feeling the unconditional love they have for their own children how on earth can they feel any love of any kind?

They can't, they are mess and broken. Zombies which live in world of fantasy.
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Re: REPLAY
#109: September 11, 2013, 03:06:30 AM
My wife and my self was really SOULMATES. That is one thing more which make me all of this even more hard. We live wonderful life, both work, have nice flat which we decorate and do all by our self. We have two beautiful kids. Daughter 19 and son 15. Everything was wonderful.

Anyway in year 2007 my wife enter in MLC, I know that preciously. I watch her, talk to her about everything when she was in first stage of MLC. She try to do million things, but wont work obviously. She gradually sink every day after day, after day. Become more depressed, angrier and angrier. In such long time she reflect on me, so, I even don't notice go after her into depression to. She enter in escape and avoid at fall of year 2011. Then she start to run away from home when ever she can... I knew what is all about. And let her go. When she refuse sex that was alarm that she have EA. And we start to talk.

Why I am telling this ? Because MLC for her was imminent. Whatever we did or she did, she will hit anyway MLC. Point is that I also become fed up about everything and into depression to and I was ready to divorce... how I felt in that moment and ratio tells me that I actually waiting for her since 2007 and how much I should wait for her ? After huge fights, I said, now it is enough, I wanna divorce ! Later searching my heart and soul, rewind all our life together, my heart can't do it ! So, I decide to be eternally alone or with her after end of that MLC crap.  But it is up to her, we as couple are in her hands and in God's hands.

Point is that LOVE means EVERYTHING to me, whole my life I put in our love. That was only my goal in my life ! Live with my soulmate and have kids, happy family. And we was that.

But MLCer can't love self, how can she love me, kids ? What is difference between me and she ? I am sane spouse, she is "insane", not accountable...

Anyway in case that I am in the MLC and she is LBS, I am SURE she will wait for me...

LOVE YOU KIDDO !  :'( :'( :'(
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