[PatienceGalore]

BooBoo ClareBear, thanks for that. I had actualy made a real effort to look presentable, even took out the polyfilla and war paint! Yes, possibly projection, because he is not really looking after himself at the moment, usually unshaven and very casually dressed. Well, he did not make me feel too awful, because if my adorable gay friend can turn, then someone will want me! Joke!!!
Albatross, I have a question: he says he feels nothing, but he says he loves and misses the children, but me, does not miss at all, or only sometimes!? Is that also a possibility if they are zombies (love that!) and a total mess?

[Albatross]

BooBoo ClareBear, thanks for that. I had actualy made a real effort to look presentable, even took out the polyfilla and war paint! Yes, possibly projection, because he is not really looking after himself at the moment, usually unshaven and very casually dressed. Well, he did not make me feel too awful, because if my adorable gay friend can turn, then someone will want me! Joke!!!
Albatross, I have a question: he says he feels nothing, but he says he loves and misses the children, but me, does not miss at all, or only sometimes!? Is that also a possibility if they are zombies (love that!) and a total mess?

They have guilt. He lies that he love kids, it is just verbal expression, he have to prove then his love. MLCers lie to self and others. Of course that You are guilty for his current misery... pure projection, so "he don't feel" for You nothing. It is much easier blame spouse... They are empty. Words of my W.

[panda]

PG - I would really pay no attention to alot of what he says - for your own protection.  Just an example - my H said the extent of his feelings for me were that he 'would not want me to die' - total rubbish.  I did actually laugh at this.

They do talk nonsense - nothing makes sense and alot of the time they don't even remember it afterwards!!!!

[PatienceGalore]

Panda, how kind of him! I understand why you would laugh, how utterly ludicrous! Yes, I am applying the 100% don't believe rule more and more, as it does make me fee safer.
Albatross, OK, that makes sense, maybe he has to think he loves them and them only. I suppose that is proven by the fact he can spend a long time not seeing them..I could not do that. But each time I speak with him, he says he wants to see them...somewhere, he must have love for them? And if he really did not love them, then he would not try to see them. he told my S15  that he wants to see more of him, and that he misses out D10 so much (she refuses to go see him, so maybe he is reacting to her rejection of him?) he is about to receive more rejection, as D18 is going to tell him what she really thinks of him this weekend, and I've emailed him to say I was no longer interested in focusing on him and his fantasy life, now focusing on me and the children. Will hope he comes to his senses before it's too late. BTW, I got NO reply to that!

[31andcounting]

PateinceGalore~ don't think that your H did not notice how you looked or that others were "noticing and commenting"  He may not of said anything BUT if he was in any type of clarity he saw and noticed.  Some are very much "internal thinkers" and never tell you. 
31 

[panda]

REPLAY - in RCRs documents she states that Replay cannot progress until the MLCer thinks the relationship/marriage is over (BD).  Does this mean if someone spent a considerable amount of time in Replay before BD, that time spent counts?  Do they process anything during this time? 

[alwayshope]

REPLAY - in RCRs documents she states that Replay cannot progress until the MLCer thinks the relationship/marriage is over (BD).  Does this mean if someone spent a considerable amount of time in Replay before BD, that time spent counts?  Do they process anything during this time?

LOL Panda - our brains operate similarly.  Great question!

[Searching4Answers]

REPLAY - in RCRs documents she states that Replay cannot progress until the MLCer thinks the relationship/marriage is over (BD).  Does this mean if someone spent a considerable amount of time in Replay before BD, that time spent counts?  Do they process anything during this time?

LOL Panda - our brains operate similarly.  Great question!

I have wondered this also. However, my H still does not want the marriage to be over 

[PatienceGalore]

Thank you 31andcounting! I hope he did, I really had made an effort!
To echo Seearching4answers and Panda: If you let your H know you are standing, that means the marriage is not over for you and they know that, so how do they progress? By us moving aside?

[OldPilot]

REPLAY - in RCRs documents she states that Replay cannot progress until the MLCer thinks the relationship/marriage is over (BD).  Does this mean if someone spent a considerable amount of time in Replay before BD, that time spent counts?  Do they process anything during this time?

Counts towards what?

Who can have the longest time mlcer?
Its not like after a certain amount of time you get out of jail for free.

It might be a lifetime sentence.