[jermishere]

I am visiting some closes friends of both my W and mine (xxx&yyyy).  XXX is the one that introduced my W and I.  They asked me a question that I didn't really know how to answer.

They asked me how they are supposed to act?  Are they supposed to have no contact?  Are they supposed to be completely honest? (knowing that they could also get pushed away).  They are full of feelings and trying to understand this as well and want to react appropriately. 

My answer was...If you want to tell her how you feel to make yourself feel better, then tell her now.  If you want to tell her how you feel in hopes of getting through to her or her having some understanding, then you will have to wait until she is ready to have the conversation.  That was my opinion.

But, I would really like to know the opinions of people that have been at this a bit longer than I.

Please assist.

Here is my thread:

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=4612.0

Edit for names that are not allowed on the site for privacy and security  reasons.  - OldPilot
I answered you on your thread and think the same applies.
Your friends should do as they choose.

[kikki]

Can anyone elaborate on touch n go or reconnection? I've read the article but am still a little confused.  There is definite movement from my H I'm just wondering if it could be reconnection

Thank you

It's pretty much impossible to know which one it is until you can look back with hind sight and see that the touch and goes became more frequent and became reconnection, or that they paused again and the MLCer went back to replay.

[Breakingthecycle]

I'm a bit confused about everything at the moment and would appreciate some input please.

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=4024.150

TIA

[jermishere]

Need some help.  Do I even respond?  Should I respond: "We are well.  D14 misses having her cat (because bringing the cat wasn't an option, but I am working some options for having the cat closer)"

I changed the names in the emails...except for the pets.  I figured they didn't need to be protected.

READ FROM THE BOTTOM FOR IT MAKE SENSE:


___________________________________________________
oh, okay, yeah do keep me posted... I think he would be happier here with Willow and Bailey then with a stranger... are you thinking  your landlord might let you have him?
 
March 1st I can go, YAY!
 
I know I haven't spent a lot of time with you, I have been so busy I can barely keep up with myself... but I want you to know I am thinking about you, and D14. How are you guys doing... adjusting to life, and the new place?
 
W

 
________________________________________

W,
 
March 1st is D14 volleyball tournament, not May 1st.
 
I would like to take care of Dennis vet bill.  I am still working on a solution to have him come down here and at least be closer to us.  I will keep you posted on that.
 
Thank you,
J
 
___________________________
 
So $182.50 okay, I will write you a check... you don't have to pay for Dennis's vet bill
 
Thanks I'll get the linked account switched over.
 
And thank you for giving me D14 schedule... I am going to be on a ship from April 24th - May 8th so I won't be able to come to that tournament, but please keep me updated on her calendar if you have time... I do still want to watch and support her activities
 
Looks like you had a good visit in Colorado.. I'm glad you went, that has been a long time coming for you, hope it was as fun as it looked
 
-W
 
________________________________________

Hi there,
 
I hope all is well.
 
The Verizon bill is due.  Total bill is $312.30.  If I pay the $180 I normally pay it leaves a balance of $132.50.
 
The Comcast bill is due.  I will pay everything above the $50 that you would be paying. 
 
I am paying both the Verizon and Comcast bill, so you can just pay me.
 
Dennis is due for some shots and a check up.  I have a check for you to cover the cost of this.  Would you mind making the appointment and taking him in?
 
Your LinkedIn account is tied to your xxx@xxx.com email. In case you wanted to change it.  There really isn’t anything of substance coming into that email so I will probably delete it by months end.
 
Also, D14 has a volleyball tournament at Mt Hood Community College on May 1st.  I do not have the times yet but she usually plays 3 games in the morning between 8 & 12…the afternoon games are dependent on how they finish in the morning.
 
Take care,
J
 

[kikki]

jermishere - it sounds as though you need to keep the communication open re bills and animals and your D.   

I would let her contact you, but when she does, I personally would briefly respond. 

[jos1.9]

I feel that my relationship with my H is at a crucial point and I would welcome comments from a mentor please??

My thread is CONFUSED IN UK PART 3.

Thank you.

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=4456.0

[bellagio88]

Hello,

My recent post (including my last main thread) is here:

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=4640.0

I would appreciate some mentorship/advice re my situation.
I am 7-8 weeks since BD and am only now JUST finding my feet through the shock (its happening very gradually).
I am confused and concerned whether my WAP is really in MLC or not - I guess I would appreciate some reminders of the process, particularly the role/purpose of OW, and the issue of NC.
Neither of us are in any contact with the other - last contact was an email from him to me over three weeks ago.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME.
B X

[Slow Fade]

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=4660.0


Not an emergency, just was able to speak some truths to my H and would like some feed back on his response. I haven't responded back to him yet and am not sure if I should or not.

[always hopeful]

Where can I find statistics on reconciliation with a spouse in MLC?  In particular if the MLCer is W.

[Shadow]

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=4611.msg297210#msg297210

Major issue or not I'm just not sure.....  If I could have some input I think it would really help me to preserve my sanity right now...    I have written a few posts the last few days without getting responses, that is why I am posting here.... Thank you