Author Topic: Mirror-Work Resources: Mirror Work & Paving the Way  (Read 48733 times)

Offline StillStanding

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Mirror-Work Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #40 on: January 15, 2012, 11:25:51 PM »
Here's an interesting experiment for journaling:

http://280d.co/udy5et

280daily is a journaling website that allows you to write one post a day of 280 characters(*) or less; it works out to about 40 words or so. You can also attach a single image to your post.

(*)You also get a monthly quota of 500 additional characters, in case you feel the need to express yourself more. If you go over the daily 280-character limit, the excess is deducted from your quota.

It's not a social network (in fact, in one of the FAQ questions they describe themselves as an "anti-social network"); there is no option to link to specific posts, or public timelines. The only people who see what you write are the ones that you show your posts to.

I've been trying it for almost a week; I get a reminder email shortly after I get home, and it gives me a chance to sum up my day without getting bogged down in specifics.
Me: 45, Her: 40. Married 16 1/2 years, together(-ish) 20.
Status: BD 8/25/09, she moved out 8/28/10. No talk of D.

Every day is another chance to get it right.
http://www.vachss.com/mission/behavior.html

"Counting days won't buy us years" —Wings by HAERTS
"Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past."  —Lily Tomlin
"When we commit to our lovers, we implicitly promise to forgive them. There is no other way we can live with someone for better or worse or until death do us part." —Dr. Frederic Luskin

Offline Trustandlove

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Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #41 on: January 26, 2012, 06:40:40 AM »
Don't know if others have found these, but I came across this site today and found it useful:

This one about working through your anger:

http://www.life-with-confidence.com/self-growth-through-anger.html

This general one about staying positive; we all need that....

http://www.life-with-confidence.com/how-to-stay-positive.html

And this one about letting go, which I found particularly sensible:

http://www.life-with-confidence.com/confidencethinking-beyond-suffering.html

Offline OldPilot

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Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #42 on: June 01, 2013, 09:21:25 AM »
We started a thread called LBS Script that includes The LBS Stages.

Here is the Link.

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=2625.0

Offline Slow Fade

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Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #43 on: July 31, 2013, 12:47:03 PM »
Ok, so I took the quiz and answered honestly and came up with "mildly dysfunctional relationship". More proof to me of MLC. If we were only mildly dysfunctional, we could have worked things out ! Instead he ran like cheap mascara!
Married 18
BD April 2012
Left home Nov 2012
Home May 2016

Offline justbelieve

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Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #44 on: September 06, 2013, 06:30:42 PM »
Slow fade I took the quiz too and got the same result! I was thinking this morning how nothing was so bad we couldn't fix it. And I'm NOT romantisizing the past (I was questioning myself on this alot) it really was an awesome relationship and so 'easy' Even he said that a few months before BD! How lucky we were that being together was so comfortable & easy. Well apparently, in MLC works, that's a bad thing. Grrrrrr!
'And those who were seen dancing were thought insane by those who could not hear the music'

Offline riverbirch

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Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #45 on: September 09, 2013, 04:05:08 PM »
I took the quiz too a while ago and got the same results. :o
Me 52
H (whatever he is) 53
D for financial reasons March 2012
Started seeing massive change over the summer 2012
Left end of October 2012
Started coming home thanksgiving 2013
Home now. March 2014
Believe ow is gone
Probably going through this for years
OW discovered Oct.23,2013,old GF from before we met at the age of 16!
Left again Oct. 20 2015
Came back two weeks later
Still here 01/17 not done yet

Offline Ready2Transform

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Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #46 on: September 09, 2013, 04:29:46 PM »
Same here.  But I tried to answer with regards to our pre-MLC relationship.  Despite how others may think there must have been something wrong for things to get to this point, we were truly that fist-bumping couple that managed really well together, until the moment that everything suddenly flipped for us as individuals.
"Unconditional love is the highest of high standards, and while we are letting go of our need to control the process of anyone else, we are taking within our lives complete accountability for our own experience."

http://seriousvanity.com/how-to-cultivate-unconditional-love-and-change-the-world/

Offline Slow Fade

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Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #47 on: September 11, 2013, 11:28:34 AM »
Same here.  But I tried to answer with regards to our pre-MLC relationship.  Despite how others may think there must have been something wrong for things to get to this point, we were truly that fist-bumping couple that managed really well together, until the moment that everything suddenly flipped for us as individuals.

Same here R2T. We were the couple everyone envied. We finished each others thoughts and more often than not when he was calling me I was calling him at the same time. We were a well oiled machine. Until MLC........
Married 18
BD April 2012
Left home Nov 2012
Home May 2016

Offline i can and will cope

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Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #48 on: September 15, 2013, 01:59:05 PM »
Same here R2T. We were the couple everyone envied. We finished each others thoughts and more often than not when he was calling me I was calling him at the same time. We were a well oiled machine. Until MLC........

this is exactly the same as us i really dont get it , i just know itis so so hard??? hugs xx

Offline ehill

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Re: Resources: Self-Focus & Paving the Way
« Reply #49 on: September 18, 2013, 06:51:05 AM »
Same here. Thats why this is so hard. All I keep thinking is How did we get here from there?  ???

 

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