[arp1]

Yes, food is good - I've started using my bread machine again and exploring new recipes! 

Getting back involved with something you once did before marriage/kids: for me it's been technical stuff for a local amateur dramatics society and my guitar playing.

More involvement with the kids' sports and school projects.

[dragonfly]

Briliant idea S&D!

I have discovered that this is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING: focus on the things you CAN control. If you don't, you will loose valuable energy and influence on the situation. I know FollowingBliss wrote about this and explained very well how the circle of control works. I cannot find it anymore, but will look again through her forum postings.

Youtube: works very well for me. I have young children. Sometimes I feel I am still operating on "survival mode", doing the things that need to be done and be fully present emotionally around them during the day. When they are in bed, I have the opportunity to read but often I lack the energy to do that or I just like it when somebody talks to me.
I have so many recommendations, but let's start with Stephen R. Covey - Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. I have this book already for years, but it got a whole new meaning for me. He explains so well how to shift from co-dependency to interdependency. For real growth and development you need to be open to self-discovery, work inside-out and give our first energies to our own character development. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7UPt5fMFxSw is part one.

The podcasts from tara brach, http://www.tarabrach.com/audioarchives2011.html. I think she is a great teacher, she helps me to embrace the present as it is, the good and the bad.

http://www.cloudtownsend.com/  I find their work on boundaries very good. There is a video channel on their site, search for boundaries and the videos will show.

Do something creative. Yesterday I picked up a block of DAS moist modelling Clay and just started working on it. I do it for the process, I will never become the next michelangelo. But I find it frustrating that I have the perfect picture in my head what it should look like, for example a person with wings instead of arms and it ends up to look like a mutulated turtle ... But my mind and emotions are set completely on the modelling.
If you cannot find any inspiration or cannot come up with an idea, you could start by following step-by-step guides. On youtube (hahaha, I told you I cannot live without anymore...) you can find so much! I started with a Mandala, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4Nlz4XMxcs. Worked out really well. A real ego-booster and again a process that consumed me. Kind of creative therapy, fill in the blank spaces with things you like.

Face your adversities. This is a tough one for me. For example, I like to cook and eat, and above all I really like to share a meal with others. But....I don't like to cook for others, organize a dinner or something. I get really stressed, feel insecure about everything. I like to change this. I don't give dinner parties yet, maybe I will never do that. But I manage to have a friend and her children over every other week for dinner and made dinners for other friends a few times. Worked out really well, I managed to do it without major stress and even enjoying it!!
But again: start small
 
To stay true to yourself, you might have to take some time to (re)discover yourself.
Take the time to explore what goes on inside you. If you get the inside right, the outside will fall into place!!


Love,
Dragonfly

[mercury]

Reiki healing helped me a lot in the beginning, it put the focus only on my healing.

Like LG I like thrift shopping, digging through all the junk for the one good find helped me to not think of him.

Writing in a journal help me to get all my feelings out, but after a while I found I was just writing the same thing over and over and over and put it away.

Vit B shots also helped, after a physical, I found out my  Vit B  was very low (I don't know why) and started to get the shots and boy did it make a different, it lift a sadness and I wasn't so tired anymore.

[forthetrees]

check out this website> http://www.eftuniverse.com/       EFT = emotional freedom technique- the premise is that emotional pain causes most of our physical pain. The site teaches, for free, a technique for releasing the pain. Today was the third time I ran across a reference to this technique from three different sources.

Youtube - Adam Ferrara- humor is the best medicine

Cup of tea or cocoa or coffee with a frothy milk topping

Dog in lap - pet therapy- lowers your heart rate

Gardening- literally touching the earth helps

Thinking about taking full breaths

[Tsunami]

Thank you FTT, couldn't have come at a better time for me!

[LearningIamOk]

Blowing off the gym to go buy flowers has made me the happiest I have been in months.  Also my horseback riding lessons that I started taking again.  It's one hour of total concentration that helps me relax my mind because I can't think of anything other than controlling the horse.
Making sure I take my vitamins and antidepressants.  I was totally against the AD's, but I make sure I take 2 fish oil capsules with it.  It's supposed to make them work better and I think I am feeling the effects far sooner than the 4-6 weeks they said it would take.

[xyzcf]

Glad you are feeling better LearningIamok. The Ad's can help to reste the chemical imbalance that occurs when we are thrown into this total chaos.

[rememberer]

Gardening is helping me immensely! I dug two huge patches, put a wood border around it, posts and chicken wire.

I have a strawberry patch, rhubarb, raspberry bushes, black currant bushes, watermelon, canteloupe, squash, pumpkins, corn, onions, lettuce, cabbages, cauliflower, lot of tomatoes, raddishes, green and yellow beans, cucumbers, beets, carrots, brocolli, brussel sprouts, bok choy...I think that's everything.

I don't know who's going to eat it all...but it sure is great growing it and tending it!

I'm also getting into Budhism and it's very interesting, helps let go of the anger and bring back love and compassion for all living beings. The meditation also helps 'control the mind', bring peacefull thoughts and makes you feel really grounded...even when your whole world is falling apart!

[BraveNewWorld]

I'd love to claim to be cool, calm and collected about all this ... I'm not ... but this link has helped me immensely:

http://www.wholeliving.com/article/natural-mood-boosters-article

I haven't as yet taken any anti-depressants - nothing against them at all - just have fought with natural boosters until now - lots of exercise, running, swimming, smoothies, diet http://www.vegetarianliving.co.uk/recipes.php?do=overview, yoga, music, sunlight ( don't underestimate the effect of sunlight ).

My sons and I have taken up rock climbing, and we can vouch for that. We grew seeds and planted seedlings this spring too. I agree about the feel of the earth in your hands.

Also, I'm playing a lot more guitar, learning a new language, and developing a new ipad app. Keeps me sane ... I think!

bnw

[Courageous wife]

Awesome thread!