[Buggy31]

ooooh...I like this thread.

Time with my dog

Makeup..this was reawakened during my transition to 30 and at the start of my H's MLC...I love playing with it..being creative..it's a way to take care of me and it lifts my spirits I tell ya'...So fun

Reading to my girls and to me 

Making stir frys for me and the kids and having a fun little treat to go with it..like fortune cookies...or rice candy...or asian fruit flavored gum..Our grocer has a fun ethnic food section

Iced coffees in the summer ( caffeine is my vice..and not good for me..but I CAN'T stop YET...not NOW)

Incense (great ones I find at our grocer that are hand rolled and made with essential oils)...two packs are my weekly treat..come in all scents and they explain the origin of each on the back of the package.

FLOWERS...planting them...smelling them...cutting them..arranging them...just looking at them.  Reminder of how fleeting life's beauty is...Zinia's are my favorite hands down..but I've planted a lot others this year like Dahlias, Poppy, snapdragons..begonias and I am going to plant some trailing nursturims  (?) for salads they make a salad look BEEEEEEEEEEEUTIFUL

Time in the sun and water.

Such a great thread...can't wait to read more

HUGS
BUGS

[good4me]

I enjoy reading anything and everything...I am trying to cut back on the MLC, depression and relationship books though.

Being near the water..whether it is sitting on the pier or walking around the harbor. I find being near water calms me. Feel at peace during these moments.

Cooking for others makes me happy. Like to look for new recipes and try them out.

Thrift store shopping..this is one of my guilty pleasures. One man's garbage is another man's treasure. This is so true

Exploring....just getting in the car and driving until something catches my eye and I stop to check it out.

Daydreaming of far off place...would love to travel to a foreign country and see all the sights and try different cuisine.

Learning a foreign language..I have been teaching myself Turkish for the past few years on and off. It can be hard but I so enjoy the sounds and dialects of the words.

Getting a manicure/pedicure. Got a facial a few weeks ago and it was awesome. Just laying there being pampered and relaxing. Letting all the thoughts just leave my mind.

Hanging out with family (in small doses) and friends. Just being me .Chatting about anything and everything that pops in my mind without fear of being judged.

When I am having an awful day -like a code blue-my three C's fix me up-cheetos, coke and chocolate.

These are some of the things I do to take care of me 

[StandandDeliver]

Sunshine is a really big one. For me BD happened at the start of a very dark long European winter and wow, I needed my AD's to get through. The sunny springtime has given me a new lease on life!!!

[BirdSoul]

This is a great thread!

Right after my H left (in the dead of a horrible winter), when I could barely breathe or function, I would come home from work and turn on all the lights just to create brightness. I could not concentrate on TV then, but I would turn on the radio for companionship; talk radio or soothing music. I threw out a plastic plant we had and bought a lush live plant to add some good karma (it's doing quite well!).

I created a shrine to H and one for myself. I know, sounds a bit creepy, but it helped me. For my H I used a recent photo of him, a candle and some holy cards (we are Catholic background) arranged on a table. For me, I hung a happy photo of myself on the wall and surrounded it, bulletin-board style, with all the kind cards and notes of love and support from family and friends.

Other things I have done and continue to do to help myself. Note, no children, so I have more time and funds for me. But hoping some of my ideas can inspire others.

Pray.
Therapy.
Sleep/rest a lot.
Use this website!!!!
Call/e-mail/visit family and friends.
Try to buy flowers on a regular basis.
Light candles (scented and non).
Read about MLC, self-help and just for fun.
Eat my favorite foods.
Took a flower-arranging class.
Took a beading class.
Restorative yoga (amazing).
Aromatherapy.
Manicures.
Gym/exercise.
Daily walks.
"Redecorate" our bedroom a bit to make it more feminine and me (new bedspread, couple of throw pillows, new lamp).
Make some small decorating changes in the rest of our home. Don't want to spend a lot of money, just change the vibe a bit.
Go to movies by myself.
Nature: walk in park/gardens.
Shopping (have to be careful with that one, but flea markets/thrift shops great!)
Have had one facial and two massages in the past 6 mos. Had the facial on a really bad, bad day. Helped a lot.
Went on a weekend trip to beach with two friends. Very restful.

Plans: Organizing/spring cleaning around the house; getting a pet; volunteering; maybe finding a church.

Hope this helps!

Blessings,

BH

[BraveNewWorld]

I thought of a thing that calms me ...

In the UK there is a radio show called 'Desert Island Discs'. The premise of the show is that a famous guest has to imagine that they have been washed up on a desert island and they have to pick their 8 favourite songs, a book and a luxury that will help them when they're cast away.

The songs they pick really provide a framework for them to talk about themselves - their lives, their relationships, what moves them.

It is a great show - what I think I like most about it is when they talk about what they learned from their parents - or those people that influenced them. It helps me to think about myself, and what might matter to my own sons.

Anyway - the BBC has released an archive of these as podcasts. It is a treasure trove - there are a lot of people that are maybe more famous in the UK ( I grew up there ) but there are a good sprinkling of American and international stars there too.

It is very relaxing to listen to - if you want to unwind, or want some calm noise in the background while you cook, or clean, or in the car etc ...

I'm working my way through them ...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/features/desert-island-discs/find-a-castaway

[Stillpraying]

I'm seeing lot's of posts with 'BUMP'  tonight.
Great to get these up where we can easily find them.
Thanks OP.

But I think a new name for Op could be 'MR BUMP'  (my kids love reading mr men

[WarriorPriestess]

I burn highly scented candles for myself every day. I get them on sale at Marshall's, Ross Stores or T.J. Maxx. Also, I have a hoard of Tuberose scented candles (my favorite) from Henri Bendel through Bath & Body Works outlets... got about 20 of them on closeout last year. Tuberose is my favorite scent and very heady!

When I know husband is visiting, I burn a Grapefruit scented candle. It smells clean... can't describe it, but it's not sweet. I always have the house clean and fresh crisp sheets on the bed and soft music on the computer so the house seems relaxing and inviting.

LettingGo, you sound a lot like me in this way!  I love prowling Ross and TJ Maxx for candles.  My favorite scents are vanilla or dessert type smelling ones.  My H also likes the clean smelling candles- I wonder if it is a male preference for certain smells?

[OldPilot]

I'm seeing lot's of posts with 'BUMP'  tonight.
Great to get these up where we can easily find them.
Thanks OP.

But I think a new name for Op could be 'MR BUMP'  (my kids love reading mr men

Well we have lots of info on the forum and I thought it would help mix it up a little to bring some of the old stuff up.

I don't want to be the only one looking for topics to merge.

[Millvina]

I find lavender on my pillow helps me sleep better. I know sleeping badly is something that affects many of us.

In the period between BD and H leaving home I tried hard to make home as welcoming and calm as possible with oils and candles etc. Have to say it didn't work! 

[Stillpraying]

Well we have lots of info on the forum and I thought it would help mix it up a little to bring some of the old stuff up.

I don't want to be the only one looking for topics to merge.

Thanks OP. (hope the name didn't offend you) Please keep it up.  I don't seem to have time to read beyond page 2 and some of these old threads have great info