[Thunder]

Yep, MWBR.   2 months after BD my H went out on dating sites and put he was divorced.  Same with a bogus dating service you pay for.  They claimed they do a background check but for some reason the background check did not catch that he was still very married, but he put D'd on his app. anyway.

So yes be careful ladies.  These guys/and girls can put anything they want on a dating site.

I also met a man on a dating site MWBR who had a "few extra weight" on his profile.  He was at LEAST 100 pounds overweight.
Like I wouldn't notice when I met him.   

[nah]

I never used dating sites for myself but I did read through them with a friend when she was using them.

I don't think they are much different then going to a club. 

It's just a way for people to meet. 

Some are looking for relationships, some are looking for hook-ups, some are liars and/or cheats, it goes on and on....

[beyondblessed]

FWIW....dating sites really are no different than any other medium because the people trolling these sites are still walking around in public doing the same.  lol

[Thunder]

True, but at least they can't lie about their weight.  lol

[beyondblessed]

True, but there are much worse things to lie about.  The physical aspects are easily recognized.....everything else....we'll look at what's happened to everyone here.  I would much rather look for a strong, emotionally well-balanced, honest and trustworthy mate, than base a relationship on the fleeting looks and physicality of a mate...those are things that can be changed.  Mental health issues, addictions and so forth...not so much.  Those are the things that lie well-hidden, obviously, and are not easily rectified.

[Returned]

I am afraid that a significant number of people on online dating sites misrepresent themselves. I have never used one, but one day I looked at POF just to see what was out there. After reading through about 50 profiles, I picked the two which sounded best. Using the information they provided in the profile I tracked down their real identities online. The supposed professor had "degrees" from diploma mills, and the supposed "doctor" had his license revoked for anger management issues. I can only imagine how many lie about whether they are married, or under what circunstances their marriage ended. Buyer beware.

[scooter]

It may be wrong because I am not legally divorced but I have been on a dating site and it has helped me not obsess so much about my H and anything that helped distract me from the pain I don't care if it is wrong. 

I felt crazy chemistry with the first guy I met and I am still reeling from it.  I don't regret it but it did move too fast we are still communicating he has a bag full of problems, drinking too much is the biggest my friends say run and I see the train wreck ahead but I can't stop the way I feel about him.  YIKES

I don't think dating sites are for the faint of heart it does a number on your self esteem when everyone you like doesn't respond and all the ones who like you are well I will be nice!!    It is still rejection, I wish guys would make the first move more I think they sit back and wait for us.

Beware of scammers if they fall in love in the same day it is a scammer....I had 3 marriage proposals in one day...LOL

[MoreWillBeRevealed]

Last night, I wrote a long comment/reply and it's not posted here. This is the 3rd time it's happened. Very frustrating.

Thank you Nah and Scooter for your honesty. I feel like the odd man out as I'm open to dating and most on this forum are against it. I think everyone is different, especially for those whose MLCer was their only sex partner or LBS was faithfully monogamous with MLCer in 20 or 30 year marriages. I was with H for 7 years. We went through a lot but I can't compare to those in decades-long marriages. Also, I was married previously and in 3 or other long-term monogamous relationships over the course of my life. For me, I have experience on dating sites prior to marriage to H. I have always had a healthy open-minded approach to sex. So I cannot compare to most LBS and they can't compare with me.

I do not see myself as cheating since we have a legal separation and he is off with OW. Sorry, but those rules just don't apply here for me. And, at this point, I am so disgusted with H, I'd rather eat an entire dirt sandwich than be with this version of my H. I have zero attraction to this man. Zero! I wouldn't date this version of H. Part of GAL for me is dating. However, I could take it or leave it and have no huge motivation to do it much of the time. I have a coffee date in a few days with a guy I met on Match. He seems ok but, yes, online dates should always be treated as "guilty until proven innocent". Don't buy the feelings of lust or "love at first site" reaction--EVER! It is a process and with online dating we don't have the luxury of knowing their background.

I don't recommend online dating for novices. I think novices should rely more on meet up groups, recommendations from friends or family, or that person who has always been right in front of you but because you were hung up on MLCer you didn't pay any mind. Dating is just that, dating. It's not a commitment to anyone. Don't feel bad if you aren't that into the person and don't want it to progress. Be honest and get out of it. Don't force yourself into liking anyone.

[lawprofessor]

More will be revealed,
You are hardly the odd man out.  A good percentage of the board is or has dated in my estimation.  I have and do.  I had a long term relationship but was married previously and had other relationships.  I have 0 attraction for the man my ex is now and he is asking to come home. 
What rules?  You are separated and make your own choices.  We all get to own those.  What matters is not how a vocal few view it, but what works in your life.  Dating is a personal choice.  Dating is a healthy option when done with a healthy mindset and for the right reasons.  I dated within a few weeks of my bd.  I've never regretted it. 
Lp

[lawprofessor]

http://esteemology.com/stop-trying-so-hard-and-learning-when-to-let-go/