[Thundarr]

L & S,

You HAVE to find a way to laugh at all this madness, and if we're not at a point where we can laugh at our own sitches then we have to laugh at each other's.  I think Mamma Bear and LC lead the way in finding humor in their H's and the actions they do and things they say.  They really are so out there that they can't be anything but crazy.  It's kind of like how people who have family members with Alzheimer's laugh about things the family member said, yet they still love them and feel for them just as much.  We all can find humor in life if we just look for it.  For instance, I know it's painful for you and do not mean to minimize it at all, but every time you mention that your partner is wearing a fake wedding ring just cracks me up!  What adult does that?  It's like two little kids who say "Let's play pretend" and then put rubber bands on their fingers and say they're husband and wife.  I mean seriously, what adult would wear a fake wedding band?!?  Is it like a Friendship Ring?  I think we all grew out of those about 8th grade didn't we?

For me, I just had to laugh at the fact that my W told our D18 that if she spent then night at her apartment then she would have to pay.  When D18 said "WTF?" W replied, "Well, you don't think you can just stay there for free, do you?"  Yeah, what teenager who jut graduated high school thinks they can stay with their parent a night rent-free?  ALL OF THEM!!!  And then, just the other day when I made a comment to W that her lawyer friend could be my friend to:

Me : He can help me move the TV. 
W:  He's my friend, not yours.
M:  He can be my friend, too.
W:  He doesn't want to be your friend!!  He's my friend!
M:  Why can't he be my friend to?  What have I ever done to him?
W:  What have you done to me for the last 20 years?
M:  That's what I would like to know!!
W:  (Lawyer friend)'s a very passive-aggressive guy who avoids conflict at all costs.
M:  Well, do you know what the technical term for a guy like that is?
W:  What?
M: A P_ssy!
W:  (Laughing) I thought you would say something like that!

Way to take up for your friend, there, Honey.  I could write all day about the stupid crap that she has said, but I usually try to just delete if from my memory banks.  She's nuts, plain and simple.

[Wed2Him?Whatever.]

Gosh, I did not think it was funny when it was being said, but i am glad it makes other people laugh.  I am glad that he was not unhappy enough to actively notice his unhappiness, despite NEVER being happy - if that makes any sense.

Sigh.

Wouldn't it be great to have the kind of "unhappiness" that doesn't even register inside your mind and takes YEARS to catch up to you?  That must be "fog unhappiness".  Or FU.

[angelgirl]

I just told my H the line about the fishing pole in the garage.
H says, "Oh yes. I get that."
ME: You do?
H: yep. That's code for "I'm lonely."
Me: Here's a thought, how about saying to your spouse "I'm lonely" BEFORE the act of abandonment?
H: I didn't say it was rational. It's just what it meant..

: )

anglegirl

[LettingGo]

There's a CODE now?? Oy Ve!

[kaffe diem]

wow, this is awesome stuff!  I so wish I had one of those...  Or maybe like many, I've just mentally blocked much of the crazy...  Then again, considering the low energy (if it's possible) off-and-on that my W appears to be, there's really not enough comm to get any of this stuff...  or maybe...  I have some new, unique type that is simply "so extremely mild MLC that they almost seem exactly like the person that you M, but only a little more extreme and they hate your guts for no apparent reason" type.

Anyhow, this might also go in the scripts we've heard, but it certainly ranks in the funny / crazy category:

W: I don't want to end up like my parents...

OK, for the record, my W almost generally sounds reasonable, for the most part...  especially in public.

M: We aren't your parents...

Now for the break down:

+ W's parents split for one year when W was about 13
+ We split a few days before D13's b-day

+ W's mom had her first child out of wedlock
+ D13 is not my bio daughter
+ W was never M prior to me

+ It is very possible that W's mom had an A prior to D FIL about three years ago
+ W definitely has had an A  (ok, not huge, but there's more about this)

+ MIL went on to M the man she had her first child with (awww...  isn't that romantic)
+ W's current OM has the same name as the man she had D13 with

+ MIL most certainly dropped the bomb on FIL, which he was blindsided with
+ W...  well, stands to reason...

+ I guess if I can ensure that W does not end up like her parents, I best not get back together with her
+ W, in 11 months has only said she agreed to D once...  otherwise, she continues to say she does not want D or is unsure...  but of course, she does not want to be M...   

[dollard]

I was living in Canada and xh was working in California
we emailed each other regularly
xh used to sign "love you  miss you with xxxx
one day I noticed he signed of with his name and xxx
a few days later it was regards and his name

[Shantilly Lace]

Conversation with Dearheart today

DH - I have never lied to anyone
Me - What?
DH - name one person who I have lied to
Me - ow every day for the past 18 months
DH - How have I lied to ow?
Me - So she knows you sleep in my bed, F*ck me
DH - yes
Me - great I will phone her up and compare notes then.

[Musica]

Oh boy, just spent a happy 30 mins reading these!! Angel girl, I laughed out loud ... too many to mention really cracked me up.

My H  ... my D made a chocolate cake recently ... he said she had used the 'wrong' eggs for the cake ... he called her up about it, and didn't let it go for days ... the 'wrong'  eggs! Crazy

Early on I also got ... 'why can't I have two families?" from him, and  ... 'I've been faithful for 22 years' ... so what do you want, a medal??

He was talking to a mutual friend a few weeks ago " I wish I was as happy as lpxpe is' he said wistfully ... 'everyone feels sorry for her and the girls, no-one feels sorry for me'  Er ... yes friend says, that's because you had an affair and left them. Duh!!

[rediscover]

Two extremely funny things from H this week, with D10.

He told D's that where he lives is secret (after 13 months we still don't know).  To avoid taking D10 to his house he dropped her off at Grandma's house while he went home to get his remote control car (yes, he now plays with remote control cars). After they got to the park he realised he left the controller, so he took D back to Grandma's house so he could go home and get it.

They were driving on Grandma's street and saw a home for rent, he said I should rent that house.  D said that would be weird to live near your parents.  You could chat and have coffee while watering you lawn in the morning.  H said, "It will be fun when you and your sister are older and you live next to me and your mom."

[angelgirl]

just recently:

H: why didn't you ever take me to Joe's Pizza? Ow took me there. (He looks down sheepishy and wiggles his feet)
(I think: ?? Still comparing me to OW???old boring mommy didn't take you somewhere special?)
W: Well, if you're a good boy, and wash behind your ears, Mommy will take you there.

angelgirl