[Mae]

I AM really good......yesterday at the gym I just felt so HAPPY....it was so weird.

Ok D and I didn't end up getting pedis done because she found a great pair of white shoes....so it was either the pedis or the shoes, one or the other but not both (I whispered to her to take the shoes....they will last longer). I was kind of embarrassed to get a pedi done anyways cause I have hobbit feet (ya know where the hair is going off.... ...really need to do something bout that before the cruise).

So things are going GREAT.....I am just in a space of real contentment with my life.

I have a H who seems to be:

1. Trying to deal with his depression through counselling and medication
2. Is away from me so I can carve out some independence for myself and not have to deal with his inability to cope with our R and his withdrawal
3. Says he is missing me and loves me very much and is making his way home
4. Has no Ow

Apart from the cuddling in bed....really what am I missing out on exactly?

I have a family life that is very very satisfying, support all over the place and a closeness with my D that makes me so happy. Really it's the two of us against the world.

So I have the present which is going wonderfully and the future promise of reconciliation with H (I am full of anticipation about that), NOW is a great place to be......even if the future doesn't play out the way I hope it will.....I will cope cause it's the future. But its all about the NOW for me.

[Mae]

Ok the cuddling in bed thingy...that is a big thing after all...

I really miss H tonight......I have some guy hitting me up at the gym, my ex trying to organise like a date with me and all I really want is to hold my H in bed, to curve my body against his in what WAS our nightly ritual.

He called me today...we chatted about the rental properties he's been looking at, work, what he did yesterday, our D.....and I was talking to him...the real him...he sounded so NORMAL.

I hope he get's this one property, it looks so nice and I could imagine me going down to visit and stay for a night, or even a weekend....that may not happen for a while though,  I am so busy for the next month.

Bedtime for me, tomorrow is another day.

[No expectations]

Mae,

Sounds like your H is a wallower, like mine.  Mine doesn't monster, he is so depressed and cries, every day.  But it is very hard on me when he shows a "normal" side of himself.  It reminds me of old H.  It really is easier when he is not here, or when he is miserable, as bad as that sounds.

I hope you have a good day, today!

[Never say never]

Mae, you are sounding so good, it's exciting to keep up with your thread!!!

An eight-day cruise??  Wow.  Now that is something to look forward to.  I wish we could all join you!

You are doing this right this time, getting your own life going on while waiting for your husband to figure his issues out. 

Things are looking very positive for you! 

[LearningIamOk]

I don't think my xH ever seemed normal. My lawyer said to me once, "Has he always been this odd?" I said, "I don't know, I guess so." 

Just start thinking about the cruise and how much fun you will have. Your H will wonder if you are meeting men. Let him wonder.

[beyondblessed]

So it took me a while to find you again, Mae!  And just so you know, I have a huge stash of 2 x 4 's readily at my disposal, should Stayed ever run out!   

[BlueBird3]

The cuddling...that's what I miss the most...my bed is too big for just me.

Oh, I love spa pedicures!!  It's my treat a few times a year....I love pretty toes!  And I did laugh at the hair thing.....I just shave it when I do my legs 

Jealous of your cruise, you gals are going to have such a great time!!

[Mae]

So it took me a while to find you again, Mae!  And just so you know, I have a huge stash of 2 x 4 's readily at my disposal, should Stayed ever run out!   

Ha ha....I will make sure I never give you or anyone else an excuse to use them on me.

[Mae]

I don't think my xH ever seemed normal. My lawyer said to me once, "Has he always been this odd?" I said, "I don't know, I guess so." 

Just start thinking about the cruise and how much fun you will have. Your H will wonder if you are meeting men. Let him wonder.

Did MLC exacerbate your H's 'oddness' LIAOK?

I'd like to think my H will wonder about me meeting men.....but I don't think he will....he knows me too well....knows I won't even be thinking like that. But at least D14 and I can giggle over the good looking boys....now D14 is who I will have to watch closely, she has the body and mind of a 19 year old. Our last shopping trip she was getting wolf whistles while we were just walking around the mall....(I don't flatter myself they were for me  )

[Mae]

The cuddling...that's what I miss the most...my bed is too big for just me.

Oh, I love spa pedicures!!  It's my treat a few times a year....I love pretty toes!  And I did laugh at the hair thing.....I just shave it when I do my legs 

Jealous of your cruise, you gals are going to have such a great time!!

I miss the cuddling SO MUCH.....damn you H!

Why have I never thought to shave the toes along with the legs  Just about everything else gets the blade (even though with no H around I needn't bother  )