Author Topic: My Story MLC - 32 going on 14  (Read 7219 times)

Offline 80GeoTopic starterTopic starter

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My Story MLC - 32 going on 14
« on: July 11, 2017, 07:42:58 AM »
Summary:
Brought together by love child in Jul. 2003
Married in Nov. 2005
BD in Jan. 2017
Move out Apr. 2017
D Final Jun. 2017
Done if she'll let me!


Hey wow I made it to my 2nd thread and feel like such a big boy! I'm so glad all of you could be here for this...only I'm not lol. Link to my first thread is below. Sorry if I'm a little hard to follow, I usually post when in the thick of it so I can ramble lol.

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9074.0
Married 11/05/05
BD 1/13/17
Moved out with kids 4/6/17
D Final 6/20/17
DONE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9-bTdvgyV4

Offline Thunder

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Re: MLC - 32 going on 14
« Reply #1 on: July 11, 2017, 07:53:18 AM »
You made me laugh.

Attaching "big boy."   :)
A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

Offline 80GeoTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: MLC - 32 going on 14
« Reply #2 on: July 11, 2017, 08:15:32 AM »
Hey UM, Thunder, WhyUs, and anyone else with the displeasure of finding yourself here.

I kinda knew I was going to get smacked around a bit for the storage unit and all, but here's the reason why. The house was leased under my name. If an eviction came down from the landlord it goes against me and not her. When I got the storage unit she had nowhere to go yet, I had to put the stuff somewhere. Yes it's all her stuff and things she wants to keep for the kids. I had removed all of my belongings and things I wanted to take for the kids already. I guess I had this pipe dream that one day she'll actually at least be able to do her part as a parent or maybe even pull her head far enough out of her @$$ that we might could put back together some kind of partnership. When that happens we'll use my flying pig to tour the country and say hello to you all.

I guess the silver lining in this is that had to be the last string right? No way she can get to me now is there? Oh but wait, where there is a will there is a way, and she sure is willing to F up my stuff in any way she can so I'm sure to step on another landmine or two. Or four or twenty.

I have to be honest though. Sometimes I read these forums and wonder just who the sick ones really are lol. I mean I can't speak for everyone but I know what I see are a bunch of wayward spouses that are living it up (kinda not really) and us suckers sitting here to lament on this board about something that try as we might we just can not change. It's not the reason I went ahead with my D, but I was kinda hoping I could just step out of this like a pair of dirty underwear or something and let her cook until fork tender. Tis not to be says the fates. (thumbs up if you visualized the 3 sisters from Disney's Hercules)

I know the only way out of MLC is through, but I'm not in MLC. Well maybe a little, but I'm handling it well I think. I've gotten in excellent shape, bought new clothes, got my nipples pierced, seen younger women (social only, but hey it's something) and am the busiest motherlover I know. But.....My kids are in good shape, my finances are getting in better shape, I'm supporting 2 families and exploring now people places and things as often as life allows.

I may be going back to court soon to finish the job here. If I leave her with any rights she will always have an avenue to take the monster out for a visit. At first, monster was like sasquatch, only I could see it. Now that is starting to spill over and others are able to witness a little and even unfortunate enough to have a little monster love directed at them. I think a BIG BIG storm is coming. Kinda like Ned Stark promised...F'n winter is coming.

Well like my bio says I am double D now, Divorced and Done, however for the benefit of no science, I will continue to document this long strange trip in hopes it helps someone else in some way. Thanks to all who have read, commented, advised, and certainly those who have experienced for themselves. In basic training I had to go through the gas chamber twice for being a smartass the first time through. I'd rather do that every half hour on the half hour than go through 3..6..11 years of this garbage. What's going to happen when she wakes up? I don't know for sure, but someone is getting an ear full. May just send her right back down that tunnel for good.

Married 11/05/05
BD 1/13/17
Moved out with kids 4/6/17
D Final 6/20/17
DONE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9-bTdvgyV4

Offline UrsaMajor

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Re: MLC - 32 going on 14
« Reply #3 on: July 11, 2017, 08:48:14 AM »
Attaching...

Nipples pierced? :o Sounds like MLC to me. <snort>

As far as the storage unit goes, OK, you've gotten her stuff out of the house and somewhere safe. Fine. Now it's on her to deal with it and pay for it, not yours.
Me - 56
xW - 49
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation
S - 12
D - 8
2 Dogs (1 each)
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

Offline Thunder

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Re: MLC - 32 going on 14
« Reply #4 on: July 11, 2017, 08:53:31 AM »
I've often thought that myself.

You read all these hear wrenching stories by us LBS's who get tossed aside so easily...yet WE are the ones trying to fix things.  Fix things we didn't even break.  Hours of reading and trying to understand something that is crazy and not to fully understood.
Then some of us actually take them back!

Makes you wonder, doesn't it??   ::) ::)

I'm kidding, but it does sound like we might be the crazies, huh?

Well, you just do what you need to do to protect yourself, ward off that big storm, but enjoy your life.  Every bit of it!
A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

Offline 80GeoTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: MLC - 32 going on 14
« Reply #5 on: July 11, 2017, 10:43:42 AM »
Yes, I will pick through the items in storage for my kids stuff they want to keep. The unit is in her name and I will not be making any payments on it.

I got the nipple piercings with her in Feb, before I knew what this was. She was complaining about spontaneity missing so I found a place at 2am to do it. She was drunk and I wasn't. I only keep them because 1) it hurt like hell, and 2) they look kinda cool on my newly carved physique lol. The younger girls love it! JK, I still have only been on the 2 social dates I wrote about earlier. I got what I needed out of those and have kept in touch but I am in no way looking to re-hitch this wagon any time soon. I answer to my children and I'm just great with that. Although sometimes I wish they had on/off switches or at least batteries that needed regular recharging!
Married 11/05/05
BD 1/13/17
Moved out with kids 4/6/17
D Final 6/20/17
DONE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9-bTdvgyV4

Offline stillbaffled

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Re: MLC - 32 going on 14
« Reply #6 on: July 11, 2017, 02:10:16 PM »
I just read your first thread from beginning to end, Geo.  Sheesh....what an everloving nightmare you've been living. 

I think I might be old enough to be your mother so wasn't going to post.  Then I figured you could use all the support you could get, even if I was old! 

Get what you want from the storage shed and stop paying the bill.   ;)
BD: 1/1/16
Together 15 years - married 7 years
His divorce final 7/26/16
Married the OW

After all, tomorrow is another day.

Offline Watcher

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Re: MLC - 32 going on 14
« Reply #7 on: July 11, 2017, 02:26:33 PM »
Attaching 80Geo

Offline 80GeoTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: MLC - 32 going on 14
« Reply #8 on: July 11, 2017, 05:23:04 PM »
Hey SB,  Watcher.

Yes that's the plan with storage and everything else attached to MLC. GTFO!

While I will be doing what I can for mirror work, the GAL part is going to have to move to the back burner as we ramp up for school. Can you believe the first day is uly 31st down here!

Hopefully. I can maintain NC for a while. Im too good at out of site out of mind to break it on my own.
Married 11/05/05
BD 1/13/17
Moved out with kids 4/6/17
D Final 6/20/17
DONE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9-bTdvgyV4

Offline MoreWillBeRevealed

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Re: MLC - 32 going on 14
« Reply #9 on: July 11, 2017, 09:17:44 PM »
Hey a new thread and an increasingly new you! I can't believe your kids start school that early. I'm in New York and they don't start till September. I work from home and it's been a challenge because camp is so expensive here. But, I have a pool so that keeps S6 occupied at least.

It sounds like you are doing everything you can to move forward. Great decision about the storage unit. I knew I was done about 4 months after BD. Even if he became this wonderful spiritual person again he did so much damage I could never let myself stoop to the level of reuniting with him. I've been dating since around December and all I can say is that it has been interesting. It has actually been great because I'm noticing all of my Character defects so I can work on them for when mr. Right does come along. Actually, the guy I am dating now is beyond wonderful but we'll see what happens. My main focus is the kids, my own emotional mental and spiritual well-being, and boiling myself. I remember how wonderful no contact was. I rarely text or talk to my ex so things are pretty Blissful and Serene. Since I have moved on life just keeps getting better and better. It will for you too!
M 4 years, together 7 1/2 years
Me 47
H 49
2014-2016: H withheld sex, love, affection, touch 100% of time.
BD1:07/20/16 "I'm not attracted to you anymore"--kicked H out and hasn't been back.
BD2: 10/17/16 OW, an ex-fiancee and an affair-down, confirmed.
Legal Separation: 10/27/16
Divorce Started: 12/2/16--I'm DONE!
Divorced 6/28/17

"I am not a one in a million kind of girl. I am a once in a lifetime kind of woman."

 

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