Author Topic: My Story Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.  (Read 2500 times)

Offline Jay78Topic starter

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My Story Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #50 on: November 04, 2018, 01:56:03 PM »
Hello everyone,

So where do I start, not so much have happened with s10, he still with W. Quick recap W was a WAW then MLC W left April and took s10 we have a total of 3 adopted kids but only took 1 saying it makes sense. And here I am court, over 10,000 in debt with lawyers. Gal and family therapy involved and nothing yet.

Well last court they recommended coparent therapy,  hahaha all I can do is laugh 3 sessions already and all I gotten is W will be marrying OW what am I going to do when OW becomes their legal step mom hahaha again. I just shook my head while W was going on about herself and OW how amazing OW is how OW has a psychology degree how OW is an executive now. How OW makes her so happy. My reply is usually Good for you now let's focus on kids.

1yr and 8months and what have I learned is crazy exist in this world. W is a crazy one. W monstering is worse. W wants me out of s10 life and OW to become s10 mom. Both live in this fantasy world. In 1yr and 8months W has moved twice purchase a car with OW. And even heard from kids, OW wants a baby. Yelp

Is interesting to hear my kids talk. Basically OW runs the house which is crazy to hear. OW says where they going to eat how much they can eat and W. OW has taken my kids to biker bar to eat with W. It was midnight as d10 said was looking at the clock.  Now it make sense why kids are so tired after only 2 days with W. I can't imagine what s10 is going through. 

GAL is in lala land her opinion is she feels W and I can work this out. Yelp GAL says she believes we still have hope. So 8 months later and no recommendations done by GAL.

In the process of the court taking their time our 3 kids are emotionally a mess especially s10 he is very angry once a happy child that loved animals now is simply angry. I have made my concerns very well known but unfortunately the system sucks here where I am at is a 50/50 state no matter what.  W has had two cps case open and not enough evidence. I just tell my lawyer what are we waiting for. Unfortunately lawyers have been honest and said pray is all you can do. The system to protect our children's have failed us. As my lawyer is also a mom of 4 and went through the same thing 4yrs ago.

W has her manic days where I stay clear. W has monster in front of kids, I have requested to have drop off and pick ups at police stations. Which GAL agree,  W always finds a way to pick a fight.  Is scary sometimes I feel W oneday will lose it on me.

I say this if looks could kill I would have been dead already W speaks at me with so much hate it's scary.

I hear many start waking up from this fog but W is so deep in this tunnel I believe is to late for W. My goal was to move unfortunately I can't unless W moves which sucks because I have no family at all here. None is just me and kids. So during holidays or summer am stuck here until 8 more years. All I can do is pray for a miracle.

At BD
Lesbian marriage
Me39,W36
S9,D9,S8 adopted all three
Together almost 10yrs
Bomb Drop - April 2017
W movedout - May,2017
OW  May orJune,2017 maybe even longer
Currently 2018
Me40, W38
S10,D10,S9
____________________________________________________
A  DAY AT  A TIME,  WITH GOD ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE

Offline Jay78Topic starter

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Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #51 on: November 09, 2018, 05:31:21 AM »
Journaling and updating

Ok so now let me go to this weekend 
I pick up d10 and s9, W of course should not get out the car or
Get next to mines. Well W gets out and walks s9 and d10 to car.
I didn't moved or said anything. W says Hi while s10 is hugging me
S10 jump in car giving me hugs and kisses. 

I realized W needs control. Is crazy

Well d10 and s9 where very quiet. Literally quite 
I knew something happened they where so quiet
Like broken. Like there spirit broken. 
I just held them and reassured them I love 
Them and they safe and I am here. 

So yesterday after school they both sitting in tables head 
Down. I was cooking. I hear a little voice 
Mommy come here I sit with them s9 grabs my hand and says
Don't cry amd remember what you told me. Its not your fault. 
I said ok s9. But as he was speaking those words my stomach knotted 
Felt like I was going to vomit. I started breathing because I knew whatever 
Happened this weekend they where about to tell me. 

S9 has his head down. I lift his chin and said I am here and held his hand
S9, well this weekend mom choked me, and punch me and was dragging me
Around. 
D10 I heard everything I ran to help me mom yeld get back to bed.
S9 Mom got mad because I was playing and not going to sleep. 
Ow was in my face screaming [censored] the f up
S9 I don't want to go back I will kill myself if I have to go back.

I of course froze. I had to get my thoughts together. 
I know I must now figure out what's next.
I got myself together at first I wanted to go to W house and beat
Her door down. But in reality I am the stable parent.

I got on the phone GAL and my lawyer 
Unfortunately there response was well 
You can call CPS but they going investigation 
But they will close it as W is not consistent. 

W had two open case and always have blamed s9 
For everything. The two cps case was for also choking him 
And ow gripping him up. 

There's been marks but I guess not enough for child abuse
Mental abuse forsure. W speaks so ill to them and horribly

Now I have called the police department and cps. Now I am waiting for them 
To interview kids and so on. 

Today taking s9 to therapy and see what I need to do to 
Help him deal with this. W only seems to pick on him
Remember s9 was my nephew We adopted him. 
So s9 looks like me and have all my characters. 
He the type of kid you can't bribe he will speak 
Out which I love about him. 

My poor baby is hurting and I can't do nothing. 
I need all the prayers and support. 

I am struggling and I honestly feel lawyers are more 
Worried about pay. Instead of kids mental and physical 
Well being.

Been convincing myself if I should do a GoFundMe page
Jist for I can pay lawyers get another lawyer because this
Is getting crazy.

I must first do all the steps I have to. But one thing I can say the
Children protecting system os horrible.  I know this mom will move
Earth if I ha e too.
At BD
Lesbian marriage
Me39,W36
S9,D9,S8 adopted all three
Together almost 10yrs
Bomb Drop - April 2017
W movedout - May,2017
OW  May orJune,2017 maybe even longer
Currently 2018
Me40, W38
S10,D10,S9
____________________________________________________
A  DAY AT  A TIME,  WITH GOD ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE

Offline Nevertoomuch85

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Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #52 on: November 09, 2018, 06:42:06 AM »
Hello Jay. That is quite the ordeal. Those poor children. My heart breaks for them. What I would do is....call the police or go to the police station and file a report every single time the kids come back saying they were abused. I would call cps every single time as well. Create a paper trail at least. Also take pictures of any bruises with your phone.  This is all evidence. I'm so sorry that this is happening. She is very toxic right now. Hugs to you and I will keep you in my prayers.

Offline Thunder

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Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #53 on: November 09, 2018, 08:00:39 AM »
Oh my gosh Jay, what a horrible position for your kids to be in.  I'm so glad they have one sane parent they can come to.

She is abusive and I agree with Never, keep reporting her and cps's every time you hear this happens.

Why does your W even want the kids???  She certainly doesn't care for them.

I'm praying you find a way of getting them away from the 2 of them.  Wish I knew how to help.

[[Big Hug]]
A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

Offline Jay78Topic starter

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Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #54 on: November 10, 2018, 05:38:42 AM »
Nevertomuch,thunder

Thank you,

Well I have done everything from Cps, to police report.

I fell bad not sure why but I also know W is in a dark place and s9
Has became her Victim.  If W treated me this way I would have suck it up. But not with my children. 

My lawyer forsure said this has been her hardest case in 27yrs.
Lawyer ask we need to higher another lawyer to see what they can brainstorm together. 

Financially I can't, I have less then 200 in bank.
What saddens me the most children's are me abuse mentally and physically and noone seem to care but me. I believe my children

The GAL said I think s9 is making it up. Then I of course got angry and said wow. With a bruise in his chest and forehead. 
Smh. I am at all with this GAL which I know the GAL has already sided with W. And my kids are suffering. 

At BD
Lesbian marriage
Me39,W36
S9,D9,S8 adopted all three
Together almost 10yrs
Bomb Drop - April 2017
W movedout - May,2017
OW  May orJune,2017 maybe even longer
Currently 2018
Me40, W38
S10,D10,S9
____________________________________________________
A  DAY AT  A TIME,  WITH GOD ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE

Offline Thunder

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Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #55 on: November 10, 2018, 05:44:39 AM »
Just keep documenting everything, and take pictures.

Is there a Domestic Abuse center near you?  They may be able to offer help.
A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

Offline Thunder

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Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #56 on: November 10, 2018, 05:49:27 AM »
Another thing you may want to do is, next time he tells you about abuse and you see bruises take him to your doctor so it is recorded for the police and/or courts.

DO NOT feel sorry for her!  No one has the right to physically harm a child.  Dark place or no dark place, she is an adult.  She could some day really hurt him.  All you're doing is protecting him.
A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

Offline Jay78Topic starter

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Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #57 on: November 10, 2018, 10:08:52 AM »
Thunder,

Thank you again, yes I did all above.  But next time lawyer said take to ER.

But little to know W had him recorder not sure what this means but GAL said there's a record of his recorder I said Ok and is it only 2 min long did W show you from the beginning what really happen.
Btw s9 no problem at school in fact he in student council and my home he is also great he is a typical 9yrs old. Sassy, talks back see how far he can go without getting in trouble a typical kid.

W makes it seems like s9 is a troubled kid and needs to be put in a mental hospital.  Like WTF... I just had to laugh.
W literally blames everyone is everyone fault. W blames Me and kids and who she can.

I did call women shelter they ask questions,  I do live by myself so we safe I have an alarm and safe in the house. My neighbor knows what's going on they said they will keep an eye out.
We sometimes go to food pantries so also food good.

My lawyer said to try to come up with retainer because this is a case she needs another lawyer.  Lawyer also was in tears as she stated I believe him. Lawyer also was in abusive H and this case brought her many memories and also in her 27yrs lawyer never seen children separated and mistreated. It sadden her. And my case is hard I also had a bad childhood that I got away from 20yrs ago so no family at all. And I am not social at all. I always been a homebody. Work and home and now that I have kids is about them which I love to do things that we can. Many free events and support mentally and emotionally for us.

This has to come to an end oneday.  We are tired. W seems to not get tired. One minute she kind the next monstering the next looks depressed.  W literally is a great poster for narcissistic or bipolar. I know we all have a narcissist side and bipolar but this is to another level of crazy. Yesterday W says to d10 Always remember I love you always I will always love ya all. And hung up  things like this makes me wonder is this it. Is W going hurt herself. Is scary d10 said that was weird I just said all we can do is pray.

I have the Trios with me so honestly I don't care as crazy it might sound. I am exhausted with W crap. It is literally tiring dealing with W.
At BD
Lesbian marriage
Me39,W36
S9,D9,S8 adopted all three
Together almost 10yrs
Bomb Drop - April 2017
W movedout - May,2017
OW  May orJune,2017 maybe even longer
Currently 2018
Me40, W38
S10,D10,S9
____________________________________________________
A  DAY AT  A TIME,  WITH GOD ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE

Offline Thunder

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Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #58 on: November 11, 2018, 11:07:12 AM »
Maybe your lawyer could find someone who would take your case pro bono.

Lawyers have to know other lawyers.
A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

Offline Jay78Topic starter

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  • Posts: 82
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Re: Am Losing My Wife and My Kids losing there Mom.
« Reply #59 on: November 16, 2018, 08:14:01 AM »
Thunder,

Guess what we did have a GAL pro bono
Guess what W declined
And W lawyer said because she use to work
for that firm. Yelp true story. 

Is crazy I have showed court financially I can't
And I been told to withdraw then. The court system here
Sucks. Really does

Is sad that we LBS, and kids suffer the most.
While MLC careless
At BD
Lesbian marriage
Me39,W36
S9,D9,S8 adopted all three
Together almost 10yrs
Bomb Drop - April 2017
W movedout - May,2017
OW  May orJune,2017 maybe even longer
Currently 2018
Me40, W38
S10,D10,S9
____________________________________________________
A  DAY AT  A TIME,  WITH GOD ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE

 

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