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Author Topic: My Story The transformative power of love

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My Story Re: The transformative power of love
#140: December 16, 2019, 02:27:39 AM
Don't underestimate the value of the support Mr. B is getting from you, even at 1000 miles away.

In some ways, one could see it as knowing there is an anchor holding things together somewhere out there, despite the storms that are currently raging around them... The major difference is that Mr. Big knows that you are supporting him as best you can rather than being the cause of the storm like the Mid-Lifer sees...
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Me - 56, xW - 50
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation
S - 13, D - 9
2 Dogs
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

b
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Re: The transformative power of love
#141: December 22, 2019, 09:09:59 AM
Thank you all for the thoughts, prayers and input.  Big's dad did pass last weekend, slowly but peacefully in the end.  Big is dealing exactly like I had hoped....maturely, like a son who loved his father very much, but knows it is a part of life and it is what happens.  So, yes he's obviously sad and hurting, but he is dealing with his grief and not ignoring his pain, which is a very good and emotionally mature response.

I, of course, have continued to be a rock and solid source of love and support, and he's been very grateful and appreciative of that.  We are doing very well and growing much closer than I think we might have under more normal circumstances, but it is what it is, and we are just so grateful to be together and have so many common traits and goals to share.  Being in an R with an actual adult is a very welcome and eye opening experience.   It is a blessing to be in this place, right here, right now.

There has been so much talk of real life on many threads.  This is real life, this is what people in real life do.  They take what life gives....not necessarily what they want or think they deserve, but what they get....and they make it something extraordinary and meaningful.  Life is happening every minute of every day....how you choose to grow it is your choice.  Like I say, good or bad, life is what you make it....extenuating circumstances be damned.  The only choices you control are your own.  Real life, real talk.
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