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Author Topic: My Story The transformative power of love

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My Story The transformative power of love
#150: July 20, 2020, 02:04:18 PM
Hey, Ready, it's great that you are still managing to get your workouts in.  It is even more important now than ever...first for your physical health and keeping your immune system strong and secondly to keep your head on straight with all the crazy changes the last few months have brought.  Everyone seems to be so anxious and on edge....the mental toughness and clarity a workout gives is second to none.  I'm so grateful to be back in my gym and getting bigger and stronger than ever.  I plan to continue to add weight...both on myself and my exercises and then cut back down in 2021.  Hopefully the last "big" bulking cycle, as so many men have already cautioned me on "don't get too big" lol 🤣😂🤣😂

The issue of shame is really an eye opening and fascinating topic.  We all have it to some degree, but just like emotional maturity and mental fortitude,  some of us are far more equipped to deal with it on a serious level.  We take responsibility and own our failures and develop characteristics that build shame resilience, which keeps us from going off the rails in fits of anger and rage to assuage the bad feelings that accompany shame.  Sound like a MLC??  You bet.  Brown even addresses the stresses and changes at midlife that shame can mitigate, though she stops short of calling the fallout an MLC.

The one thing that will always stand out to me the most though, is how once all of the lies, cheating, and covering up and hiding things began, was that my xh could never look me in the eye like an honest man.  I swear I lost every ounce of love and respect I ever had from him when that started.  He always used to take such pride in a job well done and doing the right thing.  Whatever shame demons he was battling killed that part of him....and that truly is a shame.  Things could have been so different had he only had the courage to trust me enough to know that I would have supported him in getting whatever help he needed to stop himself from imploding and causing so much irreparable damage.
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« Last Edit: July 20, 2020, 02:07:03 PM by beyondblessed »

 

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