[Mitzpah]

I think that one of the things that helps us on this site is that it really is something we can control our access to... when our lives take the hit that BD and the ensuing disaster zone bring, there is very little that we feel we can control.
I know that going to the therapist in the early days was torture, because she seemed to be 'forcing' me to GAL and accept that my marriage was over,demanding that I change my mindset and relished in opening my eyes to the fact that my h. was most probably having an affair (she was right ) - she was pushing far too hard.

Here I felt safer, at least I didn't have to come on here if I didn't want to and nobody  was pushing me to do anything - all I wanted at the time was somebody to cuddle me and tell me it would go away and although I didn't get that, I got a lot more compassion than in RL! I got gentle nudges in the right direction, I got soft 2x4s, and I got a lot of virtual hugs that do make their way over the miles - I am a lot further away geographically than most of you are from each other.

The fact that all you were telling me that h. was in the grips of this terrible thing called MLC was a life saver to me - all of a sudden, it began to make a lot more sense. That helps too.

Now, I spend too much time on here, lol! Simply because I feel safe here

But, as the recent events on the forum have shown us - we are also badly hurting and as wounded animals we do lash out at each other and can inflict pain, so we need to remember to show compassion to each other too!
JMHO

[Rollercoasterider]

Okay, I"m back from vacation...I think. 

I just wrote and posted a new blog piece: Advice for Advising. The 2nd part will come out tomorrow.

I have read this thread--I was able to read for a few minutes at a computer in the Motel lobby, but apparently it was a proxy and I could not login.

I would like to read this and the similar thread LisaLives started and hopefully comment or at least write a blog post about Detachment and No Contact like I said I would do. So I want to read these threads to write that post--or posts.

I also have 3 (YAY!) coaching requests and I've barely started the first. But after the Summer slump things are picking up.

This issue about the board attitude seems to come up every few months. The first time it came up seriously I added more moderators to give OldPilot some much needed relief, then we started the mentor program. It came up briefly last month and the next idea is to start some guided discussions--these got stalled with all of the board issues and so I want to get that back on track.

There is also a thread on the Moderator's board that became quite active while I was gone and I want to integrate responses to that into a public response. I don't know if a response will be something specifically on the blog geared toward Detachment or something broader for here. It just depends on if my Detachment post covers the other stuff or not!