[Songanddance]

Not that I have studied the articles but this is the exact conversation I had with S only yesterday.

He actually said that he felt his DNA was changing as a result of H's unresolved trauma.  We had a discussion about the impact of trauma on the mental development and therefore chemistry of the brain as a by product.  I had no idea that it might actually be a real thing!!

Need to read them now!!

[Anjae]

Genetic factors can lead to violent behaviour, but from what I recall from genetics and neuroscience courses, it does not mean they will.

The “warrior gene" was mentioned and studied in the courses, it was also said most whof have it do not have a hight propensity for violence. If I am not mistaken, the "warrior gene" is more prevalent amont European men, yet, they are not more violent than other men.

Our genes alter with ambient, therefore, having the "warrior gene" alone may not mean a thing and it mostly certainly does not.

Genes also change with trauma, etc. but, again, it will all depend of a series of several factors. It is not so cut and dry. The brain also changes with a lot of things.

Both genes and brain can re-change.

If genetics and neuroscience start to be used to let criminals get away, society is in serious troubles. I suspect it has more to do with clever lawyers than genetics or neuroscience.

[Passiflora]

Hi, even if I don't post much these days, I do read and try to keep myself updated with everyone. I'm almost 5 years from BD, I've been NC all this time, so I don't have much update on "my mlc'r" only contact is mail from mediator and/or what I hear from other people (but I'm not that interested cause "my" xh has to be one of the worst cases of monsters and he will have to take down the moon for me to have any interactions what so ever with him for the rest of my life  Anyway

Here is 2 great sources I use to listen to, both psychologists.

This one, American, (in his latest video) describes the relationship between a "MLC'r and OW/OM" (when they show strong npd/aspd and bpd symptoms or has these personality disorders)

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCC_0vyFTKk1Nlodo4QsiQkw

This one, from Sidney Australia I think, describes, both liminality and/or why or why not "they" enter or not enter "the tunnel" (as we say). He calls it self-transformation but do use the word "liminality" also.

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_P8aFACl-VqJl0flQPGMQQ/videos

I found both of them easy to understand.

Hugs

[Lady Grey]

Hi Passiflora,

Could you please post the name of the video in the second link - when I clicked it went to a whole collection of videos (which do all  sound like interesting topics) but I wanted to start with the one you mentioned about liminality and the tunnel...

Thank you for posting these

[Passiflora]

Hi Evergreen,
you can listen to all that has "self-transformation" in the subject.

Hugs

[stillbaffled]

An interesting TED talk:


https://www.ted.com/talks/guy_winch_how_to_fix_a_broken_heart/transcript?language=en#t-732792

[One day at a time]

An interesting TED talk:


https://www.ted.com/talks/guy_winch_how_to_fix_a_broken_heart/transcript?language=en#t-732792

Thank you for that Still, interesting indeed.

[Songanddance]

Just found this - of course some or most of you may have already read it.

Still useful for those moments of doubt.....
https://www.drwaynedyer.com/blog/how-to-forgive-someone-in-15-steps/

[Treasur]

Not my situation and not an entirely easy listen https://soundcloud.com/affairhealing/recoveryroom107 but maybe a worthwhile one for those of you with kids especially teenagers? The two kids here now adults are reflecting back on their memories from I think about 20 years before. It is interesting how they and their father have different memories. They have some useful things to say about their experience and what helps/hinders. And if as an LBS you didn't take to your bed for a couple of years or involve your children in hiding behind bushes to snoop...then you've already done good lol 

[xyzcf]

Barbiedoll posted this very good article on her thread:

https://www.vincegowmon.com/sacrificing-authenticity-for-attachment/