Good that you are finding yourself. If whatever you become meshes with whatever she becomes, then great. But if not, you will be in a good place no matter what. I know I have a totally different case because what my xh became is nothing I would ever have looked at twice. Unless something drastic happens, we could never be together because I have no respect for what he is at this time.
It is awesome you are standing, yet not standing still. Have you any plans to go places with the kids?