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Author Topic: MLC Monster Mistakes we have made

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MLC Monster Re: Mistakes we have made
#80: September 16, 2011, 08:50:53 AM
I think maybe i know have it...I found a letter today here on my PC at work, a long sad letter I wrote to my H over a year ago...I read it all...i didnt shed a tear...detached , just like he was when he read it. Reassured me I was doing the right thing, day 3 NC...and counting, I just need to keep myself busy over the weekend.  :)
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Me 57
H 47
BD 1 March 09
BD 2 disc OW Aug 09
H moved out to his own place April 10
Moved home and gave up cave Nov11
H has been home almost 4 years and our relationship is now better than before MLC :)
u
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Re: Mistakes we have made
#81: September 16, 2011, 01:25:36 PM
NC becomes a place of peace - for a while...
Enjoy it.
Find something great to do over the weekend.
You're doing great.
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L
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Re: Mistakes we have made
#82: September 16, 2011, 06:03:33 PM
Hyper, I applaud your strength. It is a real achievement to get to where you are. I hope to be in your position some day. To be able to really let go because it's not sincere. I am quite detached, but not to the degree I feel I should be. You are doing what you feel is right for you. That's truly monumental.
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trying2bok
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Re: Mistakes we have made
#83: September 17, 2011, 01:40:34 AM
Learning it is truly liberating and I know now I will not have any kind of R with my H at all unless he decides he can commit and wants to take me on dates etc...I feel free  :)
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Me 57
H 47
BD 1 March 09
BD 2 disc OW Aug 09
H moved out to his own place April 10
Moved home and gave up cave Nov11
H has been home almost 4 years and our relationship is now better than before MLC :)
s
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Re: Mistakes we have made
#84: September 17, 2011, 02:53:25 AM
Do the work and we will all get there! All in our own time.
hugs Stayed
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Re: Mistakes we have made
#85: September 18, 2011, 04:23:26 PM
oh boy big mistake I made about 2 weeks ago: he wanted to go out made it clear he didn't want me to come (I said fine, I'm only checking) I got paranoid , found out that a woman he's been working with was there as well
my mistake was waiting up for him asking him why he didn;t want me there, and did he know she would be there. that was that. oh boy he told her I was distraught that they'd bumped into each other (I wasn't) so he got her to phone me ,  she said it was purely a working relationship I told her I didn't have a problem with her it was HIS behaviour that was my problem) she then decided that as we had issues it wasn;t appropriate for her and h to work together (creatively) so h has now moved to the sofa, my s 20  has moved to his grandmother's because of the tension between my h and I (amongst other things, just for a week)
BIG mistake. forgot to expect nothing and forgot about giving space. but I was trying not to be a doormat.
I think h will move out again. gut feeling . 
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Re: Mistakes we have made
#86: September 18, 2011, 04:40:48 PM
Quote from: mb on September 18, 2011, 04:23:26 PM
oh boy big mistake I made about 2 weeks ago: he wanted to go out made it clear he didn't want me to come (I said fine, I'm only checking) I got paranoid , found out that a woman he's been working with was there as well
my mistake was waiting up for him asking him why he didn;t want me there, and did he know she would be there. that was that. oh boy he told her I was distraught that they'd bumped into each other (I wasn't) so he got her to phone me ,  she said it was purely a working relationship I told her I didn't have a problem with her it was HIS behaviour that was my problem) she then decided that as we had issues it wasn;t appropriate for her and h to work together (creatively) so h has now moved to the sofa, my s 20  has moved to his grandmother's because of the tension between my h and I (amongst other things, just for a week)
BIG mistake. forgot to expect nothing and forgot about giving space. but I was trying not to be a doormat.
I think h will move out again. gut feeling .

We all made mistakes. Don't worry mb, that will not be the end of your marriage. One day, out of MLC your husband won't even remember that happened.

But you should aks him never again to send any woman he is seeing to phone you. That is a boudarie you need to establish. If he has something to tell you he must be the one to do so.

Hope you'll feel betetr tomorrow.

Hugs.
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Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)
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