Thanks RCR for your wisdom and understanding.
Remember..we are all under a tremendous amount of stress...that may make us very sensitive and vulnerable and therefor overly sensitive to people's comments.
I don't mean that we must sugar coat everything we say....Stayed came down on me really heavy 11 months ago and she did it from her heart....I needed that to start picking myself up because I was close to losing not just my marriage, but myself..it was the closest that I have ever been to losing everything and I will always be grateful to her..she could have taken the safe route but she had the courage to push me until I could see something I had to see.
None of us are perfect.....how boring would that be anyway. If it wasn't for MLC, I doubt very much that we would have found friendship with one another..we are that different in so many areas...but for whatever reason we are all here and from this site we find solace.
In some ways, I wish our MLCers would be honest as we are being to communicate when there was a problem. Clearing the air, allowing us each to have our say is healthy.
Thanks so much to RCR, our moderators and all of you for taking the time to read the threads and comment when something strikes you. We are all growing and coming into our own.
Regarding the divorce thing....it is so incredibly painful to have my marriage end this way..there are times I cannot deal with the pain and sadness that this has caused.....BD may have been terrible, but this, this feels so final. And it is scary but like everything else..somehow we survive.
"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" Hebrews 11:1
"You enrich my life and are a source of joy and consolation to me. But if I lose you, I will not, I must not spend the rest of my life in unhappiness."
" The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it". Flannery O'Connor
https://www.midlifecrisismarriageadvocate.com/chapter-contents.html