Many of us have experienced great frustrations when trying to communicate with a MLCer. It's been long established that individuals who suffer MLC can become so consumed by their own emotions/self interests that communications become challenged, confused, interpreted in the worst way. 26 years ago, Jerold J. Kreisman, MD, published S.E.T. - a communication tool. Other tools followed, such as the DBT "D.E.A.R.M.A.N." in 1993 (Marsh Linehan, MD) and P.U.V.A.S. in 1998 (Paul Mason, Randi Kreger). These tools are summarized below.
These tools are more complex to use than they appear at first - especially in the emotional times that they are most needed.
• What works? What doesn't? What are traps to avoid?
• Has this been effective? What positive/negative/neutral affects has it had?
• Do you need to be the emotional caretaker? Is this just giving the MLCers what they want?
• How do you keep from damaging yourself in the process? What kind of life is this?
• Can this done with compromising the LBS principles?
S.E.T. - Jerold J. Kreisman, MD published SET (support, empathy, truth) in I Hate You, Don't Leave Me in 1991.
When first learning S.E.T., it can seem that you are being asked to agree with the MLCer. It important to clarify that validating feelings does not mean that you agree with them, only that you recognize that the MLCer is feeling them. It does not mean that you are letting the MLCer off the hook, instead you are focusing on honest communication and ensuring that you are being heard, not just reacting to and defending against what is being said.
S= Support refers to an initial statement which indicates the loved one supports the person who suffer MLC. It is a statement that begins with "I" and demonstrates concern and a desire to help. The support statement is meant to reassure the MLCer that the relationship is a safe one, and that her needs matter even during this difficult moment.
E= Empathy refers to communicating that the loved one understands what the MLCer is feeling, and focuses on "you." It is not a conveyance of pity or sympathy, but instead a true awareness and validation of the feelings of the MLCer.
"How frustrating this must be for you." It is important not to tell the MLCer how he/she is feeling, but instead put her demonstrated feelings into words. The goal is to convey a clear understanding of the uncomfortable feelings he/she is having and that they are OK.
T= Truth refers to a realistic and honest assessment of the situation and the MLCer role in solving the problem. It is an objective statement that focuses on the "it" -- not on the subjective experience of the MLCer or LBS. Often the MLCer may seem to be asking, or demanding, something impossible, not taking an active role or responsibility in resolving the issue, or even presenting you with a "no-win" situation. The truth statement is meant to clearly and honestly respond to the difficult demand or behavior of the MLCer, while placing responsibility appropriately: "This is what I can do…," "This is what will happen…,"
TOOLS: S.E.T. - Support, Empathy and TruthP.U.V.A.S. - Randi Kreger later published PUVAS in 1998 in Stop Walking on Eggshells
• P= Pay attention
• U= Understand fully
• V= Validate emotions
• A= Assert yourself
• S= Shift stuff where it belongs
This is like active listening when MLCer talk about some issue. I like last one in process. 
D.E.A.R.M.A.N. - Marsha Linehan, MD published the DEARMAN in 1993 as part of her DBT training manual.
D= Describe the current situation. Tell the person exactly what you are reacting to. Stick to the facts.
E= Express your feelings and opinions about the situation. Assume that others cannot read your mind. Don’t expect others to know how hard it is for you to ask directly for what you want.
A= Assert yourself by asking for what you want or saying no clearly. Assume that others cannot read your mind. Don’t expect others to know how hard it is for you to ask directly for what you want.
R= Reinforce the reward to the person ahead of time. Tell the person the positive effects of getting what you want or need. Help the person feel good ahead of time for doing what you want.
M= Mindfully keep your focus on your objectives. Maintain your position. Don’t be distracted.
A= Appear Confident. Use a confident voice tone and physical manner; make good eye contact. No stammering, whispering, staring at the floor, retreating, saying “I’m not sure,” etc.
N= Negotiate by being willing to give to get. Offer and ask for alternative solutions to the problem. What am I willing to “settle for” or “give up” in order to gain what I want in the situation?
This tools I find in BPD community, I replace BD with MLC and NBD with LBS. And seems all real. 
Nonetheless can be very good tools in crisis with our beloved MLCers. Or in reconnection / reconciliation.
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Communication