[Searching4Answers]

I was thinking about what a godsend all of you here are I don't know what I would do without the support of this site. I often feel bad that I can't openly discuss what I learn here with my MLCer. They are not ready for it and, in my case, I think that my H would be very upset to know what I reveal to my fellow LBSer's. This site is for me and I will not give it up, however, a part of me feels like I am keeping a secret I understand all of the reasons not to share this information with our MLCer's but is there a point, maybe in reconciliation, that we could share this site with them?   

Have any of you shared this site with your MLCer? At what stage did you share with them? How did they react?

[Anjae]

This site is for LBS, not MLCers or former MLCers. Some LBS here have had their MLCer coming around and it caused big troubles for the LBS.

I think Stayed spoke to her husband about this site, he wrote a letter about is time in crisis that Stayed shared here but I think that was years after he had returned. Still, I don't know if she really showed him the site.

IMO, showing this site to our MLCer is a violation of the LBS privacy so I would not do it. And I would not feel confortable knowing LBS are showing this site to their MLCer, let alone during their crisis.

If you are keeping a secret you are doing it for your own and other LBS safety.

[Searching4Answers]

This site is for LBS, not MLCers or former MLCers. Some LBS here have had their MLCer coming around and it caused big troubles for the LBS.

My H saw me on the site one day and he asked about it; I just told him that it was about MLC. After that I was very careful about being on here when he is home.

I think Stayed spoke to her husband about this site, he wrote a letter about is time in crisis that Stayed shared here but I think that was years after he had returned. Still, I don't know if she really showed him the site.

I think that is what got me to thinking about this topic. I believe I have read where RCR discusses the site with her H too. Obviously, it is a business for her so a little different.

IMO, showing this site to our MLCer is a violation of the LBS privacy so I would not do it. And I would not feel comfortable knowing LBS are showing this site to their MLCer, let alone during their crisis.

I completely agree.

[Anjae]

Yes, RCR husband is aware of this site but he was not during his crisis. RCR created the site after her husband crisis and Stayed's husband returned 7 or more years ago.

That is a little different than having our MLCer home, and when they return they are still in crisis, and just tell them about the site.

[rover77]

I wouldn't recommend it..my ex ,her luv toad and sister and maybe her lawyer harrassed me and disrupted the now defunct Life two forum I was on for quite a while..

[Breathe]

I'm new here, so bear with me...   

Just come from another site that was less about forgiveness, but more about controlling and taking charge of the MLC from a position of anger.  I didn't do well on there.

But my MLC did see that I was on that site, and she didn't like it.  She saw it over my shoulder one day and complained bitterly that I was sharing our secrets to the world, even though nobody knew my name and the stories are mostly the same.

This one I keep to myself.  I lurked for a long time, reading articles and posts before joining.  I'm keeping it that way forever.  This is my oasis away from the craziness of my life.  In fact she just walked up behind me and I shut the screen off.  If it looks suspicious, that's too bad.  It's now my private life of me healing myself so I can be of benefit to society, and that includes her.

It's taken some effort to let go of the notion that we are married, therefore, we share everything.  At times I used to feel I was keeping dirty secrets from her, but nothing is shared on here that she doesn't already know about me!  I'm on here to heal.  She's doing damaging actions both behind my back and right in front of me with the alienator.  At this point my feelings don't matter to her, and the alienator of course really wants me out of the picture.

A couple of months ago I suggested she may be going through MLC, the results were not good.  Wish I'd been on here back then!

[Searching4Answers]

I'm new here, so bear with me...   

Just come from another site that was less about forgiveness, but more about controlling and taking charge of the MLC from a position of anger.  I didn't do well on there.

But my MLC did see that I was on that site, and she didn't like it.  She saw it over my shoulder one day and complained bitterly that I was sharing our secrets to the world, even though nobody knew my name and the stories are mostly the same.

This one I keep to myself.  I lurked for a long time, reading articles and posts before joining.  I'm keeping it that way forever.  This is my oasis away from the craziness of my life.  In fact she just walked up behind me and I shut the screen off.  If it looks suspicious, that's too bad.  It's now my private life of me healing myself so I can be of benefit to society, and that includes her.

It's taken some effort to let go of the notion that we are married, therefore, we share everything.  At times I used to feel I was keeping dirty secrets from her, but nothing is shared on here that she doesn't already know about me!  I'm on here to heal.  She's doing damaging actions both behind my back and right in front of me with the alienator.  At this point my feelings don't matter to her, and the alienator of course really wants me out of the picture.

A couple of months ago I suggested she may be going through MLC, the results were not good.  Wish I'd been on here back then!

I couldn't agree with you more 

This site is for me and me only; the way I see it my H doesn't have a leg to stand on as far this being upset at what I am doing.

[summer90]

I would have to ask "What's the point of showing an MLCer this site?"  To fix them?  No MLCer thinks they have MLC and it's an invasion of the LBS's privacy.  We all post very private stuff here and I would hate to think MLCers are reading it.  It would be different if it helped them but it wont, so why let them?

I have had everything taken from me by my H. Money, dignity, the love we used to share and any trust we had as well.

This is the ONLY place I can go for solace and I intend to keep it private.  It's all many of us have left, our other LBS friends - keep the MLCers AWAY - (please)