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Author Topic: MLC Monster Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With II

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MLC Monster Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With II
OP: August 01, 2016, 03:55:38 AM
I don't know if this has been posted before, but I found this site IMMENSELY helpful.

I recall in it asking me one time if I thought my Ex was narcissistic, and I recall replying I didn't believe so...Later, I started second guessing myself.  No, I am NOT rewriting history.  The two articles that really scared me (as in smacked me in the face based upon my OWN situation) were the ones on female narcissists and narcissist jealousy.

http://thenarcissisticlife.com/list-of-all-posts/

-T



previous thread: http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=3917.0
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« Last Edit: August 02, 2016, 03:31:00 PM by Anjae »
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Re: Re: Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With
#1: August 01, 2016, 04:16:29 AM
Watcher stay away from them. I cannot stress this enough.

 After the DV incident (when I was trying to leave him. I ended up in the emergency room for x-rays) I sent him an email afterward and told him to stay away from me as he was playing games returning items that belonged to me. Even at that point (in 2013) I did not know really know what I was dealing with. I knew it was abuse. I just didn't understand until I got educated that he can never change or heal. He's all about control,lies, manipulation, and games. Making people miserable and causing pain brings him joy.

If I see him?  I'll make a phone call. It makes no difference to me where he ends up jail or a psych ward. I don't give a $h!te which.

Your W more than likely threw a fit because she did not know what you might say to them. Abusers want you to protect them. Trust them again? After all of that?  You are very wise not to. I know I don't.
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There are two ways of spreading light:
Be the candle; or the mirror that reflects it

Don't ask why someone is still hurting you; ask why you keep letting them.What you allow continues.

At some point you have to get sick of going through the same sh!t.

Women are NOT rehabilitation centers for badly raised men. It is not your job to fix ,parent, raise or change him.
You want a partner not a project.
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Re: Re: Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With
#2: August 01, 2016, 04:19:19 AM
Wow T_in_T  :o

I found a lot on the web. I haven't seen this site. More reading to do. Thanks! :)
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There are two ways of spreading light:
Be the candle; or the mirror that reflects it

Don't ask why someone is still hurting you; ask why you keep letting them.What you allow continues.

At some point you have to get sick of going through the same sh!t.

Women are NOT rehabilitation centers for badly raised men. It is not your job to fix ,parent, raise or change him.
You want a partner not a project.
T
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Re: Re: Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With
#3: August 01, 2016, 08:18:22 PM
I posted this site on Pixie's thread before it was closed.

http://flyingmonkeysdenied.com/

You can like the page on Fakebook, and get daily posts, extremely educational.

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« Last Edit: August 02, 2016, 03:28:27 PM by Anjae »
To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.           Oscar Wilde


"The heights by great men reached and kept, were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night."

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Re: Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With II
#4: August 03, 2016, 09:31:04 AM
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Re: Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With II
#5: August 03, 2016, 10:13:15 AM
As I was reading the different articles on here I found myself nodding. more than once.
Everything fit my 1st XH to a tee!

I will NEVER become involved with another Narc as long as I live.  It's pure hell most of the time.  The good times are very far and few between.

Sadly, he left a scar on all of us.  That's what they do.
Healing is very hard but with therapy it can happen.

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A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."
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Re: Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With II
#6: August 03, 2016, 07:33:43 PM
Great articles.

I hear ya T.

The bad times really did out weight the good.

Ugh... what a waste of time. Now to take the time to heal. ::) ( I can't believe I was that stupid)
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There are two ways of spreading light:
Be the candle; or the mirror that reflects it

Don't ask why someone is still hurting you; ask why you keep letting them.What you allow continues.

At some point you have to get sick of going through the same sh!t.

Women are NOT rehabilitation centers for badly raised men. It is not your job to fix ,parent, raise or change him.
You want a partner not a project.
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Re: Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With II
#7: August 03, 2016, 07:55:52 PM
Well, I have to give credit where credit is due...Albatross posted something in the previous thread that really upset me (no, it did NOT offend me at all...it was more along the lines of "the truth hurts" kind of upsetting).

I don't recall specifically now, but it was basically that a NPD can indeed have a very long relationship with a mirror narc (or something along those lines).

Never heard the term, so I googled it, and is how I found that site.

Yes, I am ashamed to admit it, I am a mirror narc.  At first I was really upset about it, but then again if you read "No More Mr. Nice Guy" (the title is misleading, its not what it sounds like) that is pretty much the type of person described in the book.

In summation, I truely believe my 20+ year relationship was unhealthy, and I married a full blown NPD.  I think I am one of the examples Albatross was referring to.

I should carry this to my own thread, but will continue on here:

I've also come to the conclusion my mother is a narc.  I never considered myself having FOO issues (had a rough time in school due to bullying/made fun of), but thought my childhood was okay.  I've been finding out a LOT lately...not good.  NOT GOOD AT ALL.

Went to go see her to she could see D7 before I take her back.  Had some time to talk.  I knew my mom was a strange bird (I could write books), but today was the first time she ever told me she was diagnosed bi-polar.  WTF.

Also she said something that stood out:  She was almost boasting about how hard she had worked all her life, and how it was all for us kids (it wasn't...she is a very "showy" person-keep up with the Jones' on steroids).  She wasn't supposed to, but went back to work like 3 days after I was born.  I couldn't help but wonder who was watching me during this time, but didn't ask.

-T
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« Last Edit: August 03, 2016, 08:14:07 PM by terrified_in_TN »
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Re: Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With II
#8: August 03, 2016, 08:20:02 PM
I found out the same thing T.

The narc mother and the ex even said the same exact things to me.   :o That's not an MLC.

T? The "not good at all" is where the work is
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There are two ways of spreading light:
Be the candle; or the mirror that reflects it

Don't ask why someone is still hurting you; ask why you keep letting them.What you allow continues.

At some point you have to get sick of going through the same sh!t.

Women are NOT rehabilitation centers for badly raised men. It is not your job to fix ,parent, raise or change him.
You want a partner not a project.
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Re: Narcissism, Articles, Way to Deal With II
#9: August 03, 2016, 08:22:00 PM
I just noticed, the "Mirror Narc" article didn't show up in the list that I linked to.  Odd.

For anyone curious:

http://thenarcissisticlife.com/the-inverted-mirror-narcissist/

-T
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