[Does your MLC'er appear to be attracted to you?]

Does your MLC'er appear to be attracted to you?

Never

14 (26.9%)

Occasionally

12 (23.1%)

Most of the time

13 (25%)

Always

3 (5.8%)

No contact

10 (19.2%)

Total Members Voted: 51

[Still]

How does one answer this when one is hugged, kissed, cuddled all the time and has some level of sex a few times a month but then told "I'm not sexually attracted to you AT ALL"?

....with a tazer. 

[justasking]

LOLOLOLOLOL

          

[OldPilot]

How does one answer this when one is hugged, kissed, cuddled all the time and has some level of sex a few times a month but then told "I'm not sexually attracted to you AT ALL"?

....with a tazer. 

LUCKY!!!

[BonBon]

So where does one boy a tazer?

LOL! 

Just to clarify, the physical affection was at a very low level until the last year or so.  While that's lovely to have back, it might be nice to have those cutting words reversed as well......oh, but then I might not be confused anymore so never mind....

[readytofixmyselffirst]

I have been told a couple of times that I look nice. I mentioned making love once and she said that pressured her. Of course she forgot she mentioned making love to me before I said anything.

She hugs me and kisses me from time to time if I ask. She is very cold and distant with her affection. Fortunately, I am at the point where I do not care now. I hug and kiss my own kids and I let her have her space.

Sadly, I am losing my own attraction to her. It is hard to consider physical attraction for someone who "is in love" with someone else.

[Sideways]

Lol, I asked my H if I had leprosy or something. I said, you treat me like I have a disease and I am contagious.  He said he didn't mean to do that.  But it didn't stop him.

We were always affectionate.  The first thing when we saw each other was to hug and kiss and always a pat or touch.  Then as crisis commenced...I am surprised he didn't get carpul tunnel from gripping the edge of the mattress. Lol.  Oh yeah...he did!  Had that fixed though.

I did ask him in Jan 09, about intimacy....he said..."Maybe you could pay someone for it ...I  know my Higher Power was watching out for me and kept me to stunned  or I would be serving a prison sentence!!  That was spewing Monster time.

But on a couple occassions since that time I saw him totally check me out.  My daughters saw that too. So when I go to court for our hearings, I make sure I am "court room appropriate" hot.

[Glimmer]

Pre MLC my H and I were always affectionate. After BD I also got the 'hanging on to the edge of the bed'.

Shortly after he moved out he was very flirty. Would send me lots of sexy texts full of inuendo. All that stopped for about a year, maybe the middle part of replay and just recently he has started paying me complements again, noticing when I had had my hair done (which he never did before) and just telling me how much he admires me, and he has told me a couple of times recently that he still loves me. During his touch and goes, he usually asks me for a hug.

Don't know if these feelings now coincide with him being at either end of the tunnel or not. I also notice him sneaking looks at me.

[Mermaid]

My story is strange, because H was icy and distant with me pre BD, but since then he's become more affectionate. I'm sure now he was deep in crisis a long time before BD, very depressed, cold and angry, but has been having his awakening during the past 2 years.

The first days of our separation, our attraction was like magnets! As he's felt more free, and is able to accept and enjoy his life more, he's become more affectionate and attentive.

[In this for ME]

My MLCer has admitted attraction for me on the phone and in emails. He refers to it as "undeniable"and I have validated that and if I go to him for a hug he gives it to me and waits until I pull away..but that was back in Oct 2010 when I did that last.

The last time I saw him two weeks ago or so I wanted to just fling myself into his arms but held my ground.

He avoids me but his reasons are unfinished business with EXOW and I set the boundary of if he has to be involved with her he's not involved with me AT ALL.

He does see OW at all anymore but still has her some of her crap at his house. He wants to get rid of it but doesn't want to become entagled in some way that would give her a way to take him to small claims court by throwing it away.

[LearningIamOk]

Still, I love the idea of a tazer! LOL My MLC'er is also still very attracted to me. He was not at all affectionate before. He never liked to hold my hand. He would say that's for people in love. We didn't cuddle on the couch. When we'd leave the gym together, he'd run so fast to his car, I felt like typhoid Mary, or that he didn't want anyone to see us together.
Now he tells me how hot I am. How he has trouble keeping his hands off of me. When he came for dinner on Sun., we were cuddling and kissing on the couch. He actually picked me up and put me on his lap! I suggested sex( we would have sex about 3 times a week and I was dying). He said he wasn't sure if that was a good idea. I said we are still married. I was wearing a new pair of boots, he loves boots and I wanted to look hot for him, and I told him I promised I wouldn't cry and would kiss him goodbye. We did and I did as promised.
Yes, he's most definitely attracted. I also told him I wasn't trying to manipulate him. I seriously was doing it for me. The thought of losing the great sex hurts as much as anything.
Oh, and LifeGoesOn, I love the lip icon.