[bookwrmmom]

I have found that the past two years I have struggled with the holidays. Last year and this year (for both my BF and I) are my first holidays with no kids at home. I am no longer married, and I no longer have kids at home. Yes I have a BF, but it is different. Him and I are both kind of struggling with what to do with ourselves for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I know that for Thanksgiving we decided I wouldn't cook a big meal. Last year the kids ate meals at their boyfriends and girlfriends homes, and didn't eat as much at ours. Yes they nibbled, but they weren't terribly hungry after eating at other places. So I did end up wasting some food. BF and I mentioned going to Cracker Barrel and eating, or going with his D & BF for their family's celebration (he invited us). This is ok too, as his (BF's) D is going Black Friday shopping with me and my good friend this year.
I am planning on cooking some for Christmas, and maybe doing appetizer type stuff that can be eaten "whenever". I am still just struggling with new traditions. My children don't have kids yet, and I will be sharing them with their BF's and GF's family. Same with my BF's D, but she does have a baby that we are very attached to.
How have some of my other newly empty nest LBS friends adjusted? How are you creating new traditions with your grown kids? How are you keeping the holidays happy and festive when everything you have known for years has changed?
I think this topic can help many of us tremendously.

[in it]

This year I am spending it with the same family members I did last year. The big difference is we are all eating at my cousins house..we went out last year and the meal left a bit to be desired. I don't normally complain. It was a high end restaurant the turkey had no flavor, either did the gravy.

There should be 8 or 9 of us. I enjoy a large gathering at Thanksgiving. I started crafting again a bit and made cinnamon stick Santa Christmas ornaments to give to everyone. It felt good to get creative again.

I suggested to my cousin maybe we could each say something as to what we are grateful or thankful for.

I'm making sweet potatoes.

Good topic book maybe we can get more ideas as to what we might add to the day to make it enjoyable. Cracker Barrel has really good food. If you wanted to do that maybe you could have dessert at his D's BF house? Just a thought.

Christmas I went visiting and delivering presents and spent some time with three different family members last year. I'll probably do the same this year.

[Velika]

BWM, I have a young son who has spent three major holidays away from me. For each one we celebrated, just not on the day. Yesterday my family came over so we could have "thankful-giving" instead of Thanskgiving. I made a meal that reflected our own heritage and connection to the U.S.

My son liked it and commented that we would celebrate thankful-giving every other year. I think I will make the same type of meal so it can become a special time to celebrate our family, gratitutude, togetherness, and the immigration story of each American to this country.

I have to say, similar as to being a parent, maybe holidays can be a time LBS can reinvigorate and reinterpret. This is something I also had to do when my grandmother died. For me, Christmas was my grandmother. It took me some years to find a way to love the holiday in a new way.

I hope that helps. Great question!💛

[Roma]

Great topic Book! Attaching

[bookwrmmom]

Thanks so much for the replies and ideas! One thing my BF and our friends do is have a "Friendsgiving" get together, and that is always very nice because I love our group of friends. His D and my S and his new girlfriend came, as well as my D 20. We had this this past weekend.
We are still deciding about Thursday. I have gone Black Friday shopping with my dear friend for years. Her D and mine have been BFF since kindergarten, and her and I have become very close over the years. Even though I have not much money to spend, it is a tradition that I cherish because of her. It is a sense of normalcy as I also create new traditions to go with it.
I haven't made concrete plan for Christmas yet, but I think I want to maybe start a baking/cookie tradition with the girls. BF's D-21, my D20, & S's GF who is 23. We can have fun, and all take some goodies home. Or maybe a Christmas crafting day. We will see. I will toss some ideas out.
So much change in just 3 years! There are some awesome parts and some not so awesome parts. The awesome is the sweet baby I am holding in my arms as I type. BF's grandson is just in my heart as if my own kids had had him. It is scary because I sometimes worry about if things don't work out.......more heartache. But I have learned there are no guarantees even in a long term marriage. So I will love and cherish all the moments God gives me.
I do miss the joy of Christmas morning when the kids wake up to open presents. Those of you who have kids that are young enough, please cherish it. It is gone in a flash, and it is precious moments.

[nah]

Great subject

This is my 4th holiday season post BD. We were always the center of the holidays, I hosted all holidays and even B-days for nieces and nephews/ showers/funerals etc. I could throw a party for 50+ with a days notice, and often did.

1st year nothing changed except Leaver wasn't there. After that every year has been different, some good some not so good. I handed the reigns to my sister so no more pressure for me. Honestly, I have grown to love it.

This year I'm cooking for my boyfriends Italian family (his mother died a few years ago) and I love the challenge. Even better for New Years I took the week off and we are driving south. Where? ... that we will decide when we get there..., Memphis, Nashville, maybe Miami. This I would have never in a million years if I was still with the leaver, now it's the new normal. 😀

[Thunder]

I always had holidays at our house, but after we D'd and I moved into an apartment my kids have stepped up and take turns having the family over.  It's kind of nice, no cooking or cleaning for me, just bring a side dish and a good bottle of wine.   

The one thing I did last year (for Christmas), with my growing family, I booked our party room here in my complex.
It's a beautiful place and cozy, they decorate with everything from a tree to holiday plants.  Big screen TV and sofas, chairs and tables.
There's a full kitchen, socked with dinnerware and all the pans you need.

Anyway, everyone loved it so I booked it again this year.  That may be a new tradition for us.