Hi madluv,
Thank you for sharing your experience. I understand this is soo unimaginably crazy.
I don't want to live like this given a choice. I also know making the choice is in my hands and the abuse can stop.
There are many ifs and buts. I know i will get to a place of healing. Right now priority is the house , sons college.
Update: I've gone dark grey like I told you'll earlier. He behaves himself, he is also mostly to himself. Both of us extremely busy with work.
I'm studying and completing certifications to help my career. Even though I have a tough boss she is happy with my work. Spend Lots of energy at work. I actually enjoy work. Have lots of fun.
( completely God's grace).
I watch q movie or some program before hitting the bed.
Am I over it? No. There qre tears some days sandness comes and goes, I manage. I am doing better than I thought. Except for the loss of this part of my life I'm ok.