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Author Topic: My Story Putting that learning into practice

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My Story Putting that learning into practice
#10: October 09, 2024, 07:56:35 PM
Sounds like you guys had a good outing.
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B
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Putting that learning into practice
#11: October 11, 2024, 05:25:42 PM
Yes it was FW, really nice to spend some time just with W and felt very easy and natural.

I've had a good week, it's a big week in the calendar this week for my industry in London, and there's been a load of fun stuff to go to and people to meet up with, old and new.
I had a good one to go to last night, and I took the head of production from my company along for the ride. She's an amazing woman, we've been friends for years and worked together for maybe 8 years now. She's totally my right hand woman, very much the ying to my yang work wise. I'm creative, impulsive, disorganised  and forgetful, and she's the opposite (apart from the creative bit)! We make a really good team. She hadn't been out for over a year as she has a 1 year old daughter - so she was delighted to be out and making adult conversation. We met a lot of new, fun people and had a lot of laughs. I overheard her at one point talking to someone and being incredibly complimentary about me and saying how I was a breath of fresh air in an industry traditionally dominated by misogynism. That made my night! It was incredibly telling that the girl she was speaking to said, "has he never tried it on with you? All the guys I've worked with have, at some point, tried to get me to sleep with them" Hmm, I dunno, is that how all women feel about the men they work with? I hope not.

I was chatting to W about a future work event a couple of days ago and she seemed quite interested. Today I got an invite with a plus one. I asked W if she'd like to go and she declined and said she was busy with D12 that day and I should maybe ask S18. This is progress - a few months ago she would've had a little bit of a monster and said that she obviously doesn't want to go with me and why would I ask her as it makes her feel uncomfortable (and then probably been annoyed that I didn't mention it). This time round she answered like I'd expect anyone to if asked to an event they either couldn't or didn't want to attend - "Thanks for the kind offer, but I can't make it that day, but why not take x, y or z instead as they'd love it".... That's more like it W - an adult response to a question that I based on an earlier conversation. So much easier!!
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B
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Putting that learning into practice
#12: October 25, 2024, 04:45:37 PM
So a couple of weeks since I've last posted and not much has really happened in Biscuit World.
Last weekend I was hit with an awful cold / flu virus which had me laid up for the a whole 3 days. I don't sit still easily, so it must've been bad as I didn't get out of bed for 3 days! W took on all the childcare so I could rest even though it was her weekend without kids. (She often refers to this as her weekend off - or my weekend off - which I must say infuriates me - who has kids expecting it to be a part time gig! - MLCer's clearly lol). Anyway, I was most appreciative of this act of kindness on her part. As I walked past her favourite shop in London on the way home from work the other day I popped in and picked her something up to say thanks. Nothing big, just a token really.... well that didn't go down well. Despite loving the gift and saying thank you, apparently it made her feel uncomfortable. That's fine, it's kind of a boundary of hers  I suppose - we can be kind to each other but not show it explicitly with gifts? I dunno - I didn't read too much into it - but I'll save my money next time!
I spoke to my sister tonight, we've not really had a good chat since S18's birthday party a month ago. It was good to have a catch up - I'll probably meet up with her over the weekend too. She used to be pretty close with my W, but they hardly see each other since BD. My sister is a highly trained special needs expert - working in the field of education. She hasn't seen W for months but asked, with genuine concern, if W was either self medicating or on prescription drugs at the party. She said she appeared somewhat manic but also kind of detached from what was going on. I hadn't picked up on this at the time - but my sister is really in tune with this type of thing. My family know some of what happened after BD, in fact most of it, but have continued to show kindness towards my W - which I'm thankful for. They realise how important family is to me, and have tried to be as understanding and forgiving as they can, which can't be easy given the sh$te W put me through a couple of years back.

Work has continued to be going great. The work I'm doing on my current project is quite a challenge, mainly due to the volume and turn around. I'm working with a long time collaborator / client - I've worked on every one of his projects for the last 10 years or so. He paid me a massive compliment today and said despite the challenges of this project he felt it was by far the best work we'd produced together  - which made my day!

Yesterday I took a day off work and me and my BF took her kids and D12 for a day out in town. We did a gallery, a meal and some shopping with the kids. It was really lovely. I love hanging out with BF and her kids - I never get bored of her company. She's good friends with W too - but aside from asking once how W was we didn't speak at all about any of that stuff. It was just the perfect day out, food, art, laughter, a bit more food and some shopping.  Oh and then a bit more food.

I'm going to have a very quiet weekend this weekend, the illness last week and the workload have taken it out of me - so I'm going to stay in and have a bit of a clear out and a tidy up. On Sunday I'm taking S18 to a very special event I got invited to through work - which I know he's going to love. I'm really excited to see his reaction to what we're going to - I hope he realises how lucky he is!!

B x


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