[Anjae]

The guy is a jerk and the women were fools.

Being intelligent and successful does not mean the women weren't vulnerable or insecure. Not being a well off woman does not equal being vulnerable or insecure.

I'm with Dr. George Simon when he says in the article "Gaslighting as a term has been overused," says Dr George Simon ... "

It is like the overuse of nascissist/narcissism on HS. It is so used it loses its value/ends up being applied where it does not belong to.

LBS tend to be very aware of the MLCers lies, even if LBS also tend to be very down at first. OW/OM I don't know. They probably believe what they want to believe. And the MLCer has drunk their own kool aid.

[barbiedoll]

I find this article very interesting indeed.....

http://lakelegal.co.uk/spousal-abandonment-syndrome/

[Mitzpah]

I find this article very interesting indeed.....

http://lakelegal.co.uk/spousal-abandonment-syndrome/

Really spot on

[One day at a time]

I find this article very interesting indeed.....

http://lakelegal.co.uk/spousal-abandonment-syndrome/

Interesting article... It does describe a lot of our situations however does not relate it to MLC. So is this considered normal?

[Mitzpah]

I find this article very interesting indeed.....

http://lakelegal.co.uk/spousal-abandonment-syndrome/

Interesting article... It does describe a lot of our situations however does not relate it to MLC. So is this considered normal?

I don't think it is normal - in fact, they say that only 5% of marriages end this way.

The most recent figures from the Office for National Statistics show that 130,473 couples divorced across the UK in 2013. Family law experts Lake Legal estimate that up to five per cent of UK divorces could be triggered by Spousal Abandonment Syndrome and that it is becoming increasingly more commonplace amongst UK married couples.

The article does not relate it per se to MLC, but it does give hints that it could be considered a mid-life phenomenon.

[Songanddance]

I say hip hip hooray!  Even if it doesn't mention MLC (which is largely regarded as a joke anyway) it does recognise that there is a particular pattern of behaviour which is sudden, no warning or inkling of problems or unhappiness, invariably includes an affair and that is pre-dominantly affects long term marriages.

I think this is a huge leap forward in recognition.  UK is considering changing divorce laws to incude no fault. This SAS would certainly support any spouse's claim to refuse a divorce and may even offer greater support on financial support for children.

At last - some recognition and MLC will soon be recognised and understood as countries begin to genuinely tackle mental health.

My hope is that in the future mental health issues are "prevented" where possible through clear and good education on well being and well  thinking.  In parts of the UK schools are now employing well being officers and I am focussing my coaching training on young people who face difficult home life situations as well as supporting women who are facing an LBS situation.   
The sooner we can educate people in maintaining better mental health and the sooner the law recognises this syndrome for what it could be (ie MLC) the sooner we can start to believe that it will become a thing of the past.  We can but dream...
 

[barbiedoll]

It does not say "MLC" per say, but it is written by a lawyer in a legal office, and is really talking about his "observations". BUT it screams MLC to me and likely to any therapist ( that belives in MLC) . My husband just poured coffee and I read it to him . He always gets a pained expression on his face, eyes squint and he looks up ...and he "thinks". He finally says ...that is about MLC or whatever "breakdown " I had . I had a total breakdown emotionally , mentally...in everyway possible. I did become someone else. I have been told I turned into my dad . Barbiedoll, my life in the past 10 years has almost felt like a pinball machine where all the heavy steel balls where all on one side and no matter what I did ...I could not move them .   

Daughter came into room ... conversation ended .

[One day at a time]

Oh I agree this screams MLC... My question about being normal was because it was written very matter of fact. Or at least that's how I interpreted it.. ie Spouse feels unhappy for years, doesn't communicate it and all of the sudden leaves when they find someone else.. LBS is devastated and these are the common features.. case closed!  But as Barbie pointed out (and didn't quite sink in with me when I read it), it's coming from a legal office so it is to be expected. In any case, I found it very good and one to keep in my MLC bookmarks!

I actually feel my own solicitor has made up his own mind about what's happening to my H. Certain comments he made really got me thinking he has it all figured out!

[barbiedoll]

When I saw my lawyer , who I do know fairly well , I bawled my eyes out all over him . He absolutely said ... " I have seen this countless times and by the time we get the legal balls rolling , some of these guys wake the hell up. ".  He did help me "lock-up" all the money and assets and told me" to save my money and come back in 6 months if my husband does not re-enter the planet". He KNEW for sure . I never had to see him after that .

[barbiedoll]

Another very interesting article regarding this subject ...sent to me by a long-time HS "lurker"... and thanks so much my friend , I do appreciate it!

http://www.nlpls.com/faq/spec/spousalAbandonment.php