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Author Topic: Off-Topic Hearts blessing?

t
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Off-Topic Re: Hearts blessing?
#60: May 01, 2011, 11:23:51 AM
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One of the hardest lessons I ever learned was to develop compassion for my husband; and the Lord came down hard on me more than once; I knew that he was aware of most of the things he was doing/saying; and I had the attitude that he would get it, or not; which was true; but I was called upon to help him at times with COMPASSION, and LOVE; even though I had to be tough at times.

I needed to hear this today.  My feelings for my H this weekend are far, far, FAR from charitable.
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Re: Hearts blessing?
#61: May 01, 2011, 11:36:15 AM
T

Compassion - also IMO means knowing when you need to give someone honest truths so they can face - when they are stronger - issues and deal with them (or course if they aren't already) or compassion could turn into pity and that would be detrimental to their progress?

B
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No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which one is true.”
Strength is when you have so much to cry for but you prefer to smile instead. - Andy Murray

Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. -Marilyn Monroe

"The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power." - Mary Pickford
t
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Re: Hearts blessing?
#62: May 01, 2011, 11:42:06 AM
B - and that is part of my struggle now.  Which truths do I let fly and which truths I sit on.  Yesterday I blew up at my H about a truth he did need to hear.  We'll see what happens.
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Re: Hearts blessing?
#63: May 01, 2011, 01:11:48 PM
trusting
all i can say is stick to truths that are factual that the MLC er can see when you lay it out that they need to address it as it is not behaviour that benefits anyone?
for example you left me and this is not right (true but wont make him/her sit up and see that its wrong)
BUT
You left me with a home - our investment - that is hard for me to take care of with out support either by you or you paying for someone to do what you should do as part of your responsibilities as a homeowner, etc

just IMO the best way forward but only do this when it feels right?

B xx
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No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which one is true.”
Strength is when you have so much to cry for but you prefer to smile instead. - Andy Murray

Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. -Marilyn Monroe

"The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power." - Mary Pickford
t
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Re: Hearts blessing?
#64: May 01, 2011, 02:29:04 PM
Good point, Bewildered.  You know, when I blew up at him yesterday it was about financial stuff that he NEEDS to take care of and he knows it, so I think it will be okay in the long run.  But that emotional stuff - they can't handle it right now.
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T
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Re: Hearts blessing?
#65: May 01, 2011, 02:49:00 PM
HB, I can't stop thinking about you; it's sad.

Just this past week I have been informed the Priest is moving to another parish, my counselor is being sent to Afghanistan, and now HB is moving on with her life.  I am so proud of you HB, but can't stop thinking of the wonderful impact you have had on my life in the past few months.

I know God has a plan, but sometimes it is just hard to see through the trees.
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« Last Edit: May 01, 2011, 02:50:12 PM by Tsunami »
To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.           Oscar Wilde


"The heights by great men reached and kept, were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night."

- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
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Re: Hearts blessing?
#66: May 01, 2011, 06:36:44 PM
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I know God has a plan, but sometimes it is just hard to see through the trees.

Oh, Honey, God ALWAYS has a plan, and backups in place for what He knows is ahead. :)  For every door He allows to close; another one will open with something better; it always happens that way.

You know, I mentioned earlier in my thread that my guide was taken away from me some years back; and I had to learn to stand on my own; trusting myself; but most of all, trusting the Lord who continued to guide me; even as He took her away. :)

You can't always lean on others; and I've covered this before, too; that was made very clear to me; you must learn to lean on yourself; the Lord; His understanding; and your own understanding.

He grants us the confidence to KNOW we will always know what to do; because He is there to guide us; although, He won't do it FOR us; nor will He allow others to take the lead in our lives...it is up to us to walk this road on our own.

He knows our hearts and our needs better than we do; and He always has something to back us up; He never leaves us without what we need. :)

I head to the doctor tomorrow for my next doctor's appointment; and you know, the strange thing is that I've not been worried for the past few weeks; I know what I'm facing; and I know that He has all things in His hands.

If He cares that much for the sparrow; how much more do you think He cares for us? :)
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Our marriage survived His MLC, with the help of the Lord.
I have learned that true strength is built through the trials we endure.
There is hope as long as you love your MLC spouse, and, are willing to learn the  life's lessons that are set before you as a result of this crisis.
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Re: Hearts blessing?
#67: July 25, 2011, 02:04:48 PM
While reading another thread, I realized HB has had surgery and wanted to extend a special get well thread for her to let her know how much she is loved and appreciated here on the site.

Hearts Blessing take care of youself, and we all hope to see you back soon!

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To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.           Oscar Wilde


"The heights by great men reached and kept, were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night."

- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
t
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Re: Hearts blessing?
#68: July 25, 2011, 02:33:02 PM
I keep praying for you HB and hope your recovery is going well!
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H53, M51
M 32 yrs in Feb., 2016
3 kids, ages: B31, B26, & G17
1st BD 12 yrs ago, he never left, talked him into staying.      2nd BD 8/1/10.
Daughter and I moved out Feb. 1, 2014.  We are ok.
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Re: Hearts blessing?
#69: July 25, 2011, 02:37:39 PM
Always sending love and prayers your way HB, here is to a speedy recovery!

always,
L
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2 years since he left... divorce was filed a year ago, nothing going on right now. Seems like he and OW are done...will take some more time! Seems comfortable being around me and the girls. Relaxed without her, but does not want me...or anyone else...all that matters are his daughters...

Devoted wife and mother.
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