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Author Topic: Off-Topic Anjae

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Off-Topic Re: Anjae
#20: October 14, 2019, 09:56:18 AM
When you change the entire mission of a support forum overnight without an explanation, that is a little strange. It's RCR's forum, she can do what she wants, but I do feel that when you make a place for a certain group of people and then open it up to those who might be hostile to the mission of the original group without explaining why you do it, then conflicts can arise and no one has any grounds to understand why things are the way they are. It's a lack of transparency.

It has nothing to do with Anjae other than I am replying to something someone said in this thread, as a normal conversation proceeds.

So it sounds as if for you Standing is more important in the purpose than MLC if push comes to shove? I ask bc I am conscious that there are other standing sites but are there other MLC sites other than HB? Idk.

And you did not answer my question NYM about whether you would prefer to remove those 'hostile to the mission' if by that I am right to infer you mean standing?

I understand that you were building on someone else point as you say but given that you did build on it and on this thread, I presume logically you see some sort of link if only an issue of who should be here and who not in an ideal world from your POV? That it was more than just a random comment?
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« Last Edit: October 14, 2019, 09:58:59 AM by Treasur »
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD) No kids.
H diagnosed with severe depression Oct 15. BD May 16. OW since April 16, maybe earlier. Silent vanisher mostly.
Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.


"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

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Re: Anjae
#21: October 14, 2019, 09:59:06 AM
FYI-The old tagline:

https://web.archive.org/web/20180128061050/http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/

It's RCR's forum and she can make the mission whatever she wants. But even a business or non-profit organization, if it changes its mission or scope of work, tends to put out a press release explaining it. It's the lack of transparency on the change that bothers me. Nothing more.

Treasur, to be honest, I am not going to answer your question simply because what you are asking me about is so inconsequential in the big scheme of my life that you would just suck me into a waste of my time to answer it.
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« Last Edit: October 14, 2019, 10:01:01 AM by Not Your Monkey »

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Re: Anjae
#22: October 14, 2019, 09:59:41 AM
Wow, that is really messed up.  I agree its the unwanted 2x4s to the most recent crop of LBSes that is causing such a fuss.  What use to be construed as a gentle, but blunt truth dart now seems to be interpreted as a personal insult to another's belief.

Guess I have been breaking the rules also and didn't even know it.  I have 2 accounts.  One I post under, and one I occasionally lurk under without being seen online.

At one time I suspected being "followed" therefor created the 2nd account, but have never posted with it.

Back to Anjae, AFAICT, so much for the official sanction policy.  I can't believe she would even be essentially placed in the same category of nuisance that RuggedEndurance was.

-T
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« Last Edit: October 14, 2019, 10:07:05 AM by terrified_in_TN »

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Re: Anjae
#23: October 14, 2019, 10:03:09 AM
I see. Thank you. So, if RCR were to clarify the rationale for the change, that would be sufficient for you to consider the issue resolved? Or of course to decide that this is not the site you signed up for initially which is your right too, as it is for the rest of us.

 (I have a vague recollection that she did on some previous thread but I could be wrong, my apologies, and I can't recall it sufficiently precisely to retrieve the thread link but maybe someone else can if my recollection is right?)

Yes, TNT, I didn't know about this multiple accounts rule either although in my case I only have one. I think there may be a small number of people inadvertently breaking this rule though, some perhaps for a similar reason. Maybe RCR could clarify this issue too?
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« Last Edit: October 14, 2019, 10:05:39 AM by Treasur »
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD) No kids.
H diagnosed with severe depression Oct 15. BD May 16. OW since April 16, maybe earlier. Silent vanisher mostly.
Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.


"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

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Re: Anjae
#24: October 14, 2019, 10:03:17 AM
PS:  Someone above mentioned Anjae at one time essentially ran someone off the forum and that they shouldn't be allowed here.  My memory isn't what it used to be, but the ONLY time I ever recall anyone being run off was when an OW joined and basically implied we were all a bunch of zelots and bitter ex spouses and tried to justify her actions.  I do believe most should be welcome (stander or not, at least to get your feet back underneath you), but in that case, I do believe such a person being here was wildly inappropriate.  So I have to agree with Anjae (again, if my memory is correct about this).

-T
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Re: Anjae
#25: October 14, 2019, 10:04:57 AM
I’m not sure how a more inclusive tagline is a bait and switch. Many people start out standing and for any number of reasons begin to make different choices. So HS being welcoming of that is a good thing. That doesn’t make the group hostile to standing it simply means that it is supportive of LBS progress and healing. 

Thanks for posting Anjaes response.
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Re: Anjae
#26: October 14, 2019, 10:06:12 AM
Wow, that is really messed up.  I agree its the unwanted 2x4s to the most recent crop of LBSes that is causing such a fuss.  What use to be construed as a gentle, but blunt truth dart now seems to be interpreted as a personal insult to another's belief.

Guess I have been breaking the rules also and didn't even know it.  I have 2 accounts.  One I post under, and one I occasionally lurk under without being seen online.

At one time I suspected being "followed" therefor created the 2nd account, but have never posted with it.

Back to Anjae, AFAICT, so much for the official sanction policy.

-T
There are no rules against two accounts however we know and can figure out who has more than one account - so when you break the TOS and are put on moderation and then want to avoid that by creating another account don't you think there is something wrong with that?
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Re: Anjae
#27: October 14, 2019, 10:09:41 AM
Nothing wrong with that at all OP.  I just didn't see that happen in this case, BUT....I've been gone awhile so could have easily missed it.  But thank you for the clarification that 2 accounts is okay, so long as they aren't abused.

-T
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Re: Anjae
#28: October 14, 2019, 10:17:23 AM
I see. Thank you. So, if RCR were to clarify the rationale for the change, that would be sufficient for you to consider the issue resolved? Or of course to decide that this is not the site you signed up for initially which is your right too, as it is for the rest of us.


I am going to only repeat this once. I simply am not interested in answering your question because it is not a priority topic in my life. I have more pressing things to do and think about. Not all of us are interested in analyzing the motives of everyone in this forum.
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Re: Anjae
#29: October 14, 2019, 10:18:40 AM
Nothing wrong with that at all OP.  I just didn't see that happen in this case, BUT....I've been gone awhile so could have easily missed it.  But thank you for the clarification that 2 accounts is okay, so long as they aren't abused.

-T

She created another account last night and posted with it. She also PM'ed me (and maybe others from it). To be honest, at first I had no idea who she was when she wrote to me and said she was banned. I had to ask her who she was. I have to admit I was the last person I expected she would have PM'ed under the circumstances.  ;D
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