[KayDee]

I did find it odd that in an article about how ow liked to be involved in old homes (btw something I have also loved to do and she is  living in the old home I always wanted to live in) that she would have the need to mention that she was engaged and name my ex specifically. ation.

She's extremely possessive (staking her claim) and probably feels threatened. I've had something similar. Not sure how it helps you and your family to know this - for me, it was a small moment of being on higher ground - like 'who does that?'  - not caring who they hurt as long as everyone knows they've got the candy. You can keep joining the dots from there. But then your xH, he waved it through - he's either too cowardly to tell you all himself or he's just handed the steering wheel to her and shut his eyes (or both?). Either way, is this the person you'd want to be in a relationship with now? I can only imagine the pain of the final nail when you found out about the pregnancy and engagement, the emotional attachment takes a long time to severe I think.

As you say, you have great kids and a household of love. You don't need to tell the local paper, you know what you have, it's solid. You have nothing to prove.

[UrsaMajor]

I did find it odd that in an article about how ow liked to be involved in old homes (btw something I have also loved to do and she is  living in the old home I always wanted to live in) that she would have the need to mention that she was engaged and name my ex specifically. ation.

She's extremely possessive (staking her claim) and probably feels threatened. I've had something similar.

Oh joy.... You've got yourself a Bunny Boiler....

[Raphael]

Thank you so much. Yes, I keep wondering who does this
. I hurt for my kids , but I will be there for them and continue to work on myself.

[Raphael]

I hope it is ok that I am responding to my own post. I feel like my mind is all over the place and that I cannot string one thought to another. Please excuse my rambling.
I have had a hard few days but went back and reread all of your responses and advice. I see from my own posts where I am stuck and rereading your advice is invaluable.  It's so nice to hear from people who understand.  Right now I am just so tired and know I need to  give myself some grace.  I know I will feel better again and look forward to that.
Thank you all so much!

[UrsaMajor]

This is where the old saying about "Rome not being built in a day" comes to mind.

What you describe is perfectly normal when someone that you have loved and trusted has decided to shove a grenade in your pants, run away and then laughed about it.  Just when we think we are finally out of the woods and a bit more "stable" something happens that tosses us all off-kilter again.... Just that, the next time, it takes less time/effort to find our way back to center.

If you were to go back to 2016 when I got here, you'd also see that my writings were all over the place, like tossing a bowl of Spaghetti at the wall to see what stuck because I had NO freaking clue what was going on or what had just hit me except for the fact I felt like it had been some sort of 40-ton semi.....

It takes time to be able to find our way through what's left of our lives and to rebuild them.

Yes, give yourself grace, give yourself permission to feel and to heal.  It will happen....

[Raphael]

Thank you!

[FaithWalker]

I was glad to read an update from you R, but I'm sorry about the newspaper article!  Makes you wish that the newspaper could print a correction that says "....with her 3 month old and fiance, xxx, who was someone else's husband when they got together."

LOL

When my exH was running for political office, there were people looking to dig up dirt on him and they would have found out.  I thought about posting to them anonymously but I took the high road.