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Author Topic: My Story Help Please 5

H
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My Story Help Please 5
#80: February 28, 2025, 03:55:53 AM
So I struggle on.

The latest development is I have been accused of being financially controlling. In circumstances, where I paid for everything and every expense in our marriage and my wife had all of her own money.

And dispute I multi million dollar settlement, my wife says she can’t pay half of a family impact report.

I explained how sad the allegation made me. I got something back about a hedge trimmer.

So sad and crazy.
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H
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Help Please 5
#81: March 22, 2025, 05:17:13 AM
So despite giving my ex wife a couple of million dollars the family court decided I should have to pay the whole of the $11,000 report to assess where our kids should live. It beggars belief.

It really is difficult as man to negotiate the system. There is this will to believe men are bad for some reason. I try to remain focussed on how well it is going with my daughters which is wonderful.

My wife lied in her evidence about the money she had on hand and as far as I am concerned that is it for me. Lying to me is one thing but lying on your oath is another. I suppose I should not be surprised.

I just can’t work out where my wife went. This creature is frankly unbelievable and that she has so little regard for me amazes me.


I do wish I had not hung in there so long hoping for change. The transformation seems permanent and I was naive to expect a return to the woman I knew. But I suppose I had to go on the journey to get here.


I cannot see myself speaking to her again. I try not to be moralistic but her recent behaviour disgust me.
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Help Please 5
#82: March 22, 2025, 02:36:22 PM
So sorry for the events you are going through.

The good news it that is only money you are losing now. It is something you can always make more.

The bad news is that she is taking the lead role with family court. You gotta change that dynamic - all it takes is you changing your steps. Get outside help, get coaching, do whatever it takes to make next round more balanced.

Alvin
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At time of BD.... Me: 43, XW: 41
Kids: G19,G18,G14,G12,S5
Together - 20½ Years, Married 19 Years

BD ("I don't love you"): Feb 2019, 
BD2 ("I don't want to fix this marriage."), Mar 2020
D filed May 2020, D finalized Dec 2020
I have moved on, and am in new relationship.

Lessons from Stoicism and REBT helped me to exit the chaos zone and become a better person. 

"Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within our control, and some things are not. - Epictetus"

H
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Help Please 5
#83: March 22, 2025, 06:34:25 PM
Thanks Alvin,

I have the best legal advice and have done my best. I just can’t lie on affidavits given my role as an officer of the Court.

I have just learned how far gone she is. It will be a long road.
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« Last Edit: March 24, 2025, 03:43:09 AM by UrsaMajor »

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Help Please 5
#84: March 23, 2025, 02:34:45 PM
Help sorry about the situation you are in right now. I cannot imagine to be in your shoes. I hope the court will make a balanced and fair decision. Praying for you. It’s been 2 years since my divorce and I’m glad it was over. You’ll get there too.
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Me 43 at BD
H    45 at BD
Married 11 yrs at BD, no kids,
BD May 2019 (I moved out Nov 2019)
EA or PA with ex gf (not sure), H spent 3 nights with the hoe during our vacation in July 2019, it was a friendly encounter according to H
H wanted D April 2020 seeing suspected OW2 (divorced with two kids) and 2 years older than him, H didn’t file the D
Clinging boomerang
6/21 H moved in with me; kicked him out 01/22
H turned into a vanisher, wants a Divorce, OW 3 (16 years younger and extreme sporty)
14.11.22 Divorce final, I'm done

 

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