[Butterfly]

Thanks Trusting,
I've just felt a change in his energy for the last month. Much lower energy than early on. Contact three days in a row. Two visits. Completely different. Had been only seeing a few minutes every two weeks.
Now getting texts out of the blue. About nothing. Expect some avoidance now for a while. 21 st anniversary due next week. Wasn't sure if that factored in or not. Expected to be a wreck myself. Surely he will feel some anxiety.

[trusting]

Butterfly -  sounds like some touch and goes.  Yes, keep your expectations at zero.  He will continue to cycle and may back off after increasing contact.  It is FRUSTRATING which is why you need to keep your expectations down and stay detached.  Do you have something special planned for yourself on your anniversary?  If not, make sure you do plan something fun for you to do to keep your mind off of it.  Anniversaries can be really, really hard, and no doubt it will affect your H as well.  Mine hasn't ackowledged our last two and he lives in the same house. 

[Glimmer]

Hi my H has less energy than earlier on. He is constantly tired and feeling under the weather. He isn't rushing off every evening to socialise like he used to. The atmosphere in the house is calmer when he visits and he seems more relaxed and I can see more of his old self shining through.

I think OW is still around but to a lesser degree. He doesn't see her every day now, but exactly how often I don't know. He told me he has 'cooled' things.

The last couple of weeks he has seemed happier. Even though I have had touch and goes before, this one does seem different in the way he is interacting with us, chattier, laughing singing etc. even joking with me a couple of times. Sometimes I forget and it feels just like it did before he left. Where exactly he is in his MLC though I don't know.

 

[justasking]

Glimmer

Your H is still in replay although his behaviour maybe less extreme. Until OW is completely gone and he goes through OW withdrawal he will not move in the tunnel. He may well be reflecting where he is and what he wants but hence seeing glimpses of your old H. When they start to come towards the end of replay their behaviours become less and you will see sign of an old and new H.

Along with this awakening will be increasing sadness as he starts to realise the mess he is in a some realisation about what he has caused.

I suggest you watch and wait as it may be a touch and go but you feel its different. Follow your intuition closely and read this Awakening and reconnection thread. HB and RCR have posts on here that might help.

You know not to have any expectations though. Carry on as you are. No loss of patience or pursuing lol

xx

[OldPilot]

To rephrase what JA just said, he may be moving in the tunnel(they always are moving at less than a snails pace)
Just he hasn't gotten to another stage yet.

Yes, keep carrying on, nothing you do changes for a while.

[hurt01]

I thought since there were so many on here now who,s H/W is seems to be having an awakening at the end of replay, not to get confused with the Awakening at the end of withdrawl it need its own thread.

I know I sure could use some helpful information on this. As my H seems to be ping ponging all over the place and i,m confused.

[HeartsBlessing]

There was a thread started on this subject by JustAsking sometime back.

Read here:

(this thread merged with the thread linked- Old Pilot)

Read through the whole thread; it should help you to understand the Awakening some more.

It is different for each person, as each person is different, each crisis is different; what one person will do another won't do.

Oh!  And read JustAsking's thread; her husband is going through his Awakening; the OW still remains at this time, but his replay behaviors are diminishing as each day passes.

Hope this helps, too.


Note Edited
This thread was merged into this thread link goes back to start

[hurt01]

Talk to D a few minutes ago. I thought I was the only one that noticed H was keeping his hair cut , clean shaven all the time and he had stopped wearing his cap , but D noticed to.

I had not really noticed H clothes or heard anything about his clothes. D said her dad was wearing his OLD clothes again, and he hadn,t shaved and looked wooly. Said he had gained some of his weight back.

She said H truck was nasty inside and out and had scratches all over it. H has always kept his truck VERY clean. Spit shine clean.

Don,t know if any of this means anything.

[hurt01]

If H is having an awakening at the end of replay at some point will he contact me. I keep reading about touch and goes and them looking towerd home to see if the door is still open. When might this happen?

Or could H move on through to OW with drawl (if he dumps OW) depression and so on before or if he contacts me?

[HeartsBlessing]

When might this happen?

Or could H move on through to OW with drawl (if he dumps OW) depression and so on before or if he contacts me?

As each person is different each crisis is different.  What one person might do, another one won't do.

Awakening, ending of Replay, OW Withdrawal..the times and when these will happen is unique to each MLC'er, Hurt. 

This would be unknown at this time for anyone...he could do either one or all you've mentioned; or he could do neither and become stuck in the tunnel.

It ALL depends upon your husband; nothing you can do or watch for at this time.  IF he comes forward or not; will still depend upon him; and what issues he may be facing or not facing.

He must do this on his own.

No one knows what will happen; you can only let go and continue working on yourself; hoping that all will come out all right, and trust in God for what happens next.

I'm not getting anything on your situation at the moment, except to tell you to let go and let God work within the situation.

Even I was uncertain as things progressed along; I had no idea what would happen next, or when it would happen.

I just had to let it happen when it was time for it to happen. 

I got instructions at certain times; but only when it was necessary.

Keep your focus on you; and don't worry about what he's doing or not doing at the moment.

Hope this helps.