[Standing in Patience]

C'mon, aren't your curious? Petraeus - CIA, hi profile, risking reputation for an affair, narcissism, younger woman, etc. Not to mention the incredible damage to spouses, family members, trust of your country and fellow human beings.....Your thoughts? MLC or not? Maybe not - Petraeus is said to wanting to try to repair his relationship with his W.

[xyzcf]

It makes me sick to hear another one. And she is married as well.

Yet some people think that he should not need to have resigned over this.

I feel sorry for his wife of 37 years and for her husband. The damage that they have done for their selfishness...yet I wonder....how will my MLCer see this? Can he relate? Probably not.

[Trustandlove]

They can't relate.  During this time my H has been confronted by someone who said that he was just like someone else who did something along these lines, and his only response was "I don't like to see myself that way". 

They honestly don't see themselves as doing the same thing; it's like what is said about the fog -- the fog is there because if they really looked clearly at what they are doing they'd be so horrified they couldn't cope.  It's the only way they can justify their actions. 

[Standing in Patience]

"After being married for over 37 years, I showed extremely poor judgment by engaging in an extramarital affair. Such behavior is unacceptable, both as a husband and as the leader of an organization such as ours," Petraeus said in a statement Friday.

This seems to say that David knows that he has done wrong - terribly, horribly wrong. "Poor judgement", recognizing his own behavior, husband, etc. The hurt to his family, extended family and friends hasn't been acknowledged here but we know that there is more that COLLATERAL damage here to assess, deal with and repair. I hope David and Holly have the strength to move toward repair their relationship - of course, it could take years.

Often I think it's the spouse that has to show the strength of character, have integrity that gets the couple through. Too many, have thrown in the towel. What's a year long affair compared to 37 years???

Gotta make you wonder when if he thought about it further, he wouldn't be surprised that the CIA and FBI organizations might be forced to get involved. Both affair partners should have been smart enough to KNOW this. 

[LettingGo]

Sounds like a "normal" affair to me... when exposed, it ends, with both offenders realizing what they stand to lose...

[TrustingMyHP]

Yes, I agree.  A "normal" affair.

From what I've read, the affair between Petraeus and Broadwell ended some four months ago.  Petraeus never left his wife to be with Broadwell and he certainly is putting forth conciliatory sounding language in his resignation statement.

The politician who was a true MLCer in recent years was Mark Sanford, former governor of South Carolina who ran off, literally, to be with his Brazilian OW.  In June, 2009 he was missing for 6 days(!) and his wife claimed not to know where he was.  When he resurfaced it seems he'd been spending the time with his OW in Brazil and he made a public statement about it talking about how "in love" he was with OW.  Definitely MLC script!

Sanford's wife was no stander, although she did say publically she thought her H was having a MLC.  She filed six months after Sanford's announcement about the OW.  Sanford and his wife had four young boys and had been married for some time.

Sanford's wife wrote a book about the experience.  In August, 2012, Sanford announced his engagement to the OW.

Couldn't be more classic.  Petraeus' affair sounds nothing like this.

But hey, is there something about physicians' spouses?  My H's OW was the wife of a doctor when she met my H.  She left her husband, eventually divorcing him, six months after meeting my H and, of course, they're still together.

Petraeus' lover, Paula Broadwell, H is also a physician and this new woman who's been identified, Jill Kelley, the woman who Broadwell sent the jealous "threatening emails" to, which started the whole FBI investigation, is also the wife of a doctor!

TMHP

[B]

They can't relate.  During this time my H has been confronted by someone who said that he was just like someone else who did something along these lines, and his only response was "I don't like to see myself that way". 

They honestly don't see themselves as doing the same thing; it's like what is said about the fog -- the fog is there because if they really looked clearly at what they are doing they'd be so horrified they couldn't cope.  It's the only way they can justify their actions.

This in a nutshell.  The CIA dude sounds like a man intoxicated by his power and privilege and didn't think he'd get caught.  Hubris. 

[Ready2Transform]

Doctors work long hours, and have their concentration so deeply in their work, they present their spouses opportunity.  That's my take, anyway.  For this sitch, I agree the General seems to be just drunk on power, but I wonder about his affair partner.  She has a lot of the earmarks of borderline personality, seems obsessed with proving herself.  I don't know if that leans more to MLC than to BPD, but I guess that depends on what she was like before.

[calamity]

From what I heard there were hefty financial benefits for the biographer [is that what they call it now? ]  But apparently she was a source of information for other journalists so she was really feathering her own nest.  She fits BPD tho. 

[Anjae]

It is hard to tell if it is MLC or not. Not all MLCer leave the spouse. In his position he would have to say what he said. Most likely someone even wrote him those words. He does seem to have forgotten than the head of the CIA can get caught. And that a former lover may not be very pleased with a new woman taking place. Agree with Ready2, doctors work long hours, leaving their spouses vulnerable.