[watching and waiting]

Thanks for the link HB,
I expect there are alot of tears tonight after listening here.

Its more of a sob than a stream here LMM.

HUGS and prayers
x

[forthetrees]

Okay,
I have discovered soundcloud.com and will post my MLC songs that were my therapy along the journey. These songs came through me- almost like emotional vomit so to speak. Some are humorous, some are folksy and some are just plain sad, sad, sad. They chronicle the journey. This post came about three quarters of the way through MY journey post BD.

Enjoy, here´s the link.

http://soundcloud.com/greymulder/souffle/s-zvgJs

[forthetrees]

Here´s another one entitled "Pity Party"

This came to me while walking the dogs after work one day and I was coming out of the woods and into the meadow I was feeling quite sorry for myself but at the same time knew I had to pull out of it- so this was my "self-talk" in a musical and comic way of dealing with it.

In the first verse, the lyrics include "straighten your bow" but in the second version of that stanza the lyrics are "straighten your beau."

Enjoy,

http://soundcloud.com/greymulder/pity-party/s-PQWCp

[forthetrees]

Here´s a happy tune- this is the most recent, in the last three weeks. I find it psychologically interesting that my songs are no longer about h- that´s a sign of healing for sure. I am sharing this tune with my students to encourage them to take risks and believe in themselves. I shared it recently with a friend about to undertake a big consulting job and she hit a home run. Friends, believe in yourselves!

http://soundcloud.com/greymulder/big-dipper-kid-version/s-3kiWR

When I wrote this, it was a clear, dark night and I was seated on my beloved chair and a half (best thrift store purchase EVER). I turned my head to look out the window and there, resting on my shoulder, was the big dipper. I teach Spanish and in Spanish, your north (tu norte) is your goal in life.

FTT

[forthetrees]

Here´s another one- about half way through my journey. I sang this on the way to school each morning to pull myself together and avoid falling into a pity party (which I´d already perfected and thankfully moved past). This song was my self-talk mantra to hang in there but not get sucked into h´s despair.

http://soundcloud.com/greymulder/if-you-want-to-cope/s-yKUgk

[GottaBeMe]

FTT,

These songs are wonderful.  You are so talented to be able to write this way.  Is that you singing them too?  If so, you have a nice voice! 

I just wanted to tell you that, and keep them coming.  Thank you so much for sharing them.

[forthetrees]

This one was written near the end of my stand- it was to give me hope that even though h was out of my life, my life would keep going.

http://soundcloud.com/greymulder/leaf-peepers/s-98OWo

[forthetrees]

This was written last winter when I finally started realize that the issues of most importance lay in h´s court and were not of my making. Yes, there were shared communication issues, but this refers to what he was denying within himself.

http://soundcloud.com/greymulder/knife-of-shame/s-eMSA6

[forthetrees]

This was written last spring when I FINALLY accepted that FTT did not have a hand in fixing this.

http://soundcloud.com/greymulder/there-is-nothing-i-can-do/s-24t15

[forthetrees]

This one was to give me hope for a future no matter what.

http://soundcloud.com/greymulder/planting-time