[Not Applicable]

Old Pilot:

The best support, and the most comfort your site can offer, is to alert traumatized people who stumble on here that their spouse, soulmate and best friend of however many decades could be seriously ill.

I read a thread here that asked why "Midlife Crisis" wasn't medically recognized. It is! But it has a different name, and once a mass, stroke and psychiatric disorders are ruled out, we have ftd.

Yes, once other disorders are ruled out...Well I just reviewed this criteria and I can tell you my husband does NOT have bvMLC according to the internationally accepted standard:
http://202efj2j1feo1vhg033du05m.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/Table-3-International-consensus-criteria-for-behavioural-variant-FTD.pdf

I also suggest you read the exclusion criteria at the bottom and note that behavioral disturbances better explained by psychiatric diagnosis must be ruled out first. My husband's behavior much more closely matches descriptions of male depression and/or complex PTSD than it does bvFTD. I think that would be true of the vast majority of the spouses on here. In fact, many of them do have other psychiatric diagnoses.

If our spouses have not had other problems ruled out then what makes it your business coming here telling us they need to be checked for bvFTD before all the other conditions that likely much more match their behavior?

Midlife crisis may not be a medical diagnosis in and of itself, but that does not mean if our spouses were diagnosed with something that it would actually be bvFTD. There are plenty of other conditions that are far more prevalent and likely that need to be ruled out first.

I'm just going to take CPTSD as an example. Here's the proposed criteria for it: http://traumadissociation.com/complexptsd

My husband sadly meets this criteria to a T.

The definition of dementia according to the Alzheimer's association is as follows: "Dementia is a general term for a decline in mental ability severe enough to interfere with daily life." I don't see people coming on here and complaining that their spouses can't function in daily life.

I think the problem bvFTD is that  you have been reading sites like the Daily Mail etc. where they say bvFTD is often confused with "midlife crisis." I think what they are talking about here in the news is the stereotype of "midlife crisis" that the general public has, not the one that we talk about here on the site. These are very different things.

Anyway, I am not sure the point of engaging with you on this. You seem to have donkey blinders on and can only see one disease, bvFTD, to the exclusion of all other possibilities.

[Thunder]

"Is it possible that MLC could be something as simple as a person realizing they are getting older and having lots of regrets?  Could it be that the person was stuck emotionally in childhood because of an event and midlife triggers it because it is a transition from young to old age?"

Of course it is, Northern.

I would say that is probably the majority of the MLCer's on this site.
My H's crisis was more hormonal and about a fear of aging, but he's pretty much back to his old self now....but it took him a few years.

No mental illness, just a midlife crisis.

[Absolutely Fabulous]

I would love to know about this. Keep posting, if it helps anyone here... Most people will not welcome this, but it's a good thing to post about. I don't think that everyone's spouse on the forum is suffering from MLC. I do believe that there are a few, not many, that have exit affair spouses, not MLCers.

All avenues should be explored for one reason and one only: if there are some in need of medical care, better safe than sorry. It's like finding out you have cancer after it metastasizes, it's too late.

I'm not sure if MLC is a mental illness, or just them snapping out. Having said this, I'm going to be attaching to see what other information you can provide.

Don't let anyone deter you from posting, someone here may find out that this is indeed the case for their spouse. We are all voicing our opinions, some are welcome, and some will be to threatening. Either way, it's a good way to find out where people's heads are.

[Thunder]

I agree, but let's keep it to this discussion thread, so if people want to read about it or have questions they can ask here, if not they can skip it just like any other discussion thread that doesn't pertain to them.

Discussion threads can be very useful.

[xyzcf]

Absolutely fabulous

bvFTD has another thread with information about this disease. You can find it at:

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9256.msg606280#msg606280

There are also many threads that have researched biochemical and neurotransmitters causes:

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=1786.0
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=6315.0
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=7709.0
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8607.0

and also:

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=1522.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=3669.0

[Velika]

I would love to know about this. Keep posting, if it helps anyone here... Most people will not welcome this, but it's a good thing to post about. I don't think that everyone's spouse on the forum is suffering from MLC. I do believe that there are a few, not many, that have exit affair spouses, not MLCers.

All avenues should be explored for one reason and one only: if there are some in need of medical care, better safe than sorry. It's like finding out you have cancer after it metastasizes, it's too late.

I'm not sure if MLC is a mental illness, or just them snapping out. Having said this, I'm going to be attaching to see what other information you can provide.

Don't let anyone deter you from posting, someone here may find out that this is indeed the case for their spouse. We are all voicing our opinions, some are welcome, and some will be to threatening. Either way, it's a good way to find out where people's heads are.

I agree 100 percent.

There is no reason at all to discourage people from pursuing any and all avenue of inquiry. What if each and every one of us found our spouse doesn't have bvFTD following exhaustive medical testing? Wonderful! But I have started threads on demonic possession and gut health and no one told me to go away from this forum, find a forum for people whose spouse have actually been confirmed to have been possessed by the devil.

bvFTD is generously sharing her experience. My sister just accepted a position researching FTD at a respected lab and guess what! She is very interested in pursuing FTD and possibly overlap with MLC. And this is thanks to what I have shared of my own experiences with MLC, what I have told her I have learned on this forum, and what I have shared to her that bvFTD has posted here.

People who are writing that bvFTD always progresses quickly or leads to sudden and obvious losses are incorrect. A New York Times article noted that half of all cases present atypically. Some suspects bvFTD patients have normal scans.

I mentioned this on another thread on this topic, but I called UCSF bvFTD research center. To my surprise they were extremely receptive to my call, validated my concerns, and offered experienced support in ways to encourage my FH to be screened. The woman I spoke with echoed much of what is mentioned on this forum. I wished I had called right away, to be honest, when my FH seemed to have more clarity and so I could have possibly enlisted the help of his family and mine, before he did so much damage.

[Thunder]

But in all fairness Velika, you did not say there was no such thing as MLC, you were just giving a point of view to discuss. 
It was welcomed by many people and they joined it.

That's what discussion groups are for.  Idea's, questions, sharing.  Not absolutes.

[Velika]

But in all fairness Velika, you did not say there was no such thing as MLC, you were just giving a point of view to discuss. 
It was welcomed by many people and they joined it.

That's what discussion groups are for.  Idea's, questions, sharing.  Not absolutes.

Yes! We agree.☺️

I don't mind if someone says MLC doesn't exist. If I truly believe it exists then this doesn't do anything to change my belief.

For what it is worth, I think pursuing line of inquiry into bvFTD is actually a possible avenue into understanding what MLC as a unique syndrome could be. Since it appears bvFTD phenotype has a lot in common with MLC, this would be interesting to explore. Sadly, there are not MLC research centers around the country, but I imagine FTD research centers do see people who have a similar syndrome that either doesn't progress or that people recover from.

All to say -- bvFTD researchers and amateur researchers are our allies whether our spouses have this or another condition affecting similar region of the brain. (Or even whether they don't have this at all, just in the way that cancer and heart disease researches and firemen and EMTs  are also everyone's ally.)

When I called UCSF I was told, as bvFTD mentioned in another thread, this is poorly understood and underdiagnosed condition, in no small part because people who have it lose their own self awareness and do not believe they are ill. She told me, like bvFTD wrote, that most research on dementia has gone into Alzheimer's, so people are often unaware that someone can have dementia that affects personality and behavior this way -- and at this age.

[bvFTD]

LBS:

People do not change suddenly in midlife. They do not turn into sociopaths, narcissists or monsters, blow up their beautiful little worlds they've built for 2 or 3 decades unless something is terribly wrong with the BRAIN.

Your site is wonderfully supportive to people who stumble on here in pain, shock and in trauma because you provide immediate support and comfort, which is so very helpful and admirable.

But you must know that the most relief you can provide is a REASON for a bomb wiping out the family. Please tell people who come onto your site to rule out frontotemporal dementia or a slow-growing tumor in the frontal lobe or tiny strokes before delving into childhood issues that didn't seem to interfere with your beautiful marriages of decades before (however; familial ftd would have definitely wreaked havoc in their past).

You probably know where I am going. Get your spouse diagnosed to help us find the cure before one of your children is afflicted later. My husband's ftd is sporadic. But 30% to 40% are not.

bv

[xyzcf]

Hello bvFTD,

I have merged your new thread with the old one. Each poster needs to keep a thread going for 150 posts.

I disagree totally with your idea that MLC does not exist.

As we have repeatedly said, there are many many "causes" that potentially could mimic MLC but there is absolutely NO DOUBT in my mind that MLC does exist and that the vast majority of the people who post here are dealing with that and not a pathological condition.