[ascending]

This is so weird.  My h has always been modest--very blond, no tan, thin.  I mean, he was never an adonis.

Last week, fixing something, he took his shirt off to keep it clean.  No undershirt [also strange].  He never, never goes topless.  So weird.

I went & found him a t-shirt b/c the kids [d21 & partner] were here & they were I was embarrassed.

Lol.... That is all

[STILL IN LOVE]

My H started working out (that stopped), bought just about all new clothes and gave the old ones away, started whiting his teeth, going to the tanning bed more often than ever before, getting his hair cut different, using different shower gel and even body spray for men. Sometimes even 2-3 showers a day and the brushing and flossing of his teeth......... every single time he ate something, snack or meal....... I'm mean seriously !!!

H now eats totally different than he used to........ say's he needs to lose his stomach (that's from drinking too much beer now) ! H was slim when he started seeing OW then after moving in with OW gained MASS weight. Went for 34w to 40w........ He's back to 36w now.

It's just another part of MLC. H was always a bit vain but it's gotten alot worse since OW !

[FindingJoJo]

So they feel free, no more embarrassment, no more tiresome social awkwardness, but as most of us have witnessed here, the new found "freedom" goes hand in and with abhorrent behaviour, lies, deceit, adultery and Monster. These are not manifestations of emotional health. Emotional health is quietly confident and benevolent.

I wonder mine is embarrassed or paranoide that everyone is laughing at him for this.  He won't talk to his mother because she hates the people that OW is related to as I said it is a family thing through marriage so her sister was married to this things uncle.  They are a very destructive clan, anyway he is afraid to talk to his mother because she hates that side of the family and doesn't talk to our sons because he thinks they are laughing at him is that normal?  I mean he is in hiding about it all.  I know I played into the embarrassment by telling everyone what was going on, but I was tired of the lies, I have since gotten my brain back from meltdown after the first two weeks.


Edit for quoteBrackets - OldPilot  < = [

[calamity]

If your h is embarrassed about any of it he is a lot more self-aware than most in my limited experience. 

[Ready2Transform]

The pendulum swings both directions, I've found.  Mine was totally humiliated by the A being made public by me (his GRANDMA knows...that was NOT in the plans!).  But at the same time, other things go completely over his head that would have completely shamed him before.  At one of the jobs he's had during all of this, his team leader suggested he go back on his meds...and he was never even on his meds when he worked there, so he must have *really* been making a scene.  He'd told me he'd fidgeted so much during meetings people asked him to leave.  But yet...not a wake up call. 

[kikki]

FJJ - paranoia seems to be a part of MLC around BD and for a while afterwards.  It does seem to settle down the further into the tunnel they go. 

[FindingJoJo]

The pendulum swings both directions, I've found.  Mine was totally humiliated by the A being made public by me (his GRANDMA knows...that was NOT in the plans!).  But at the same time, other things go completely over his head that would have completely shamed him before.    But yet...not a wake up call. 

Mine is humiliated and of course it is all my fault by me making it public.  You are right there are many things that go completely over his head, like wondering why I was so mad - go figure.

[FindingJoJo]

FJJ - paranoia seems to be a part of MLC around BD and for a while afterwards.  It does seem to settle down the further into the tunnel they go.

Definitely experiencing paranoia.