Thank you ALL, for the good wishes. I will need them
""Was there any sign from him prior to this that he was changing?""
Last year, October, again, out of the blue, I got a text from him saying "Do you want me to come back? How will it ever work?
I replied "It will work, but you have to be ready for it". We texted for almost 2 hours and in the end he said that "she" was the love of his live, but he was done with her. I didn't believe it. My detaching was starting to work, a little.
He became much calmer, much more understanding and caring. I had never seen that in him, or at least in many years.
In January this year, I saw that he had gone back to visit her, on one of his "business trips". She lives out of state. She is an ex wife from 30 years ago and they were only married 1 year. Their marriage was annulled.
Since then, he has been going back about once a month, so I let it go. Never said a word, I just pretty much stopped caring. I started living my life, trying to build a new life, without him.
This summer, I went home, to Germany to visit my family. I had been saving to go home, but when the time came to book my flight, he insisted to pay for it. Got his computer and booked my flight right then, I guess to make sure I wasn't paying for it, myself. I thought that was strange, but again, I let it go.
Again, when I came home, I expected nothing, that was the end of July. I didn't text, I never called, I only answered a text if he texted first. We started going to breakfast on the weekends, but that was it.
Two weeks ago, he said, out of the blue, that he wanted to talk to me the following weekend. I just said ok. That was the end of that conversation.
I had established my own routine at home. Going to work, going to the gym every day. He didn't cross my mind every single minute, anymore, so I felt good.
That weekend came, we went to breakfast on Saturday, he said nothing. He texted me in the evening to go have a drink,he said nothing. He met me the next morning to go to breakfast, he said nothing. Then he told me he was going to a football game that evening. I just said ok, have fun.
That evening, I send him a text saying " You said you wanted to talk to me, but you never did?" He replied "I'm coming over after the game, tonight" He did, sat on the bed and said "So, I was wondering if you want me to come back?" He said "I don't want us to end up like my brother" (who went through MLC and his wife left him and remarried).
I waited a minute or two and then told him "Yes, I want you to come back" He held me in his arms the rest of the evening and told me he was moving back home when his lease is up in 4 weeks. I told him that it will take some time for both of us to get used to this, again, but that I'd give him all the time he needed. It was ok.
He said he didn't want to be a prisoner in this house
. I said I don't care if you hang out with your buddies, I don't care if you go to football games. I just want you to come home at night and I want you to stop seeing her. He said he was done with her and that he loves me.
That was pretty much all that was said. I learned not to ask too many questions, I learned to let him do this on his time and that this cannot be rushed.
He said I want to take you on a cruise during Christmas Break, just the two of us, he already booked it. We are going to the Cayman Islands
A room with balcony, so we can enjoy the view
. So sweet. I wanted to say "Who are you and what did you do to my husband, but I didn't, cause I really don't want the old guy back
This is the beginning of a new Beginning, I guess. I will keep my guard up for a while, I know that, cause I will not ever let anyone hurt me like this again. I am a completely new Me and I will never be my old self, again.
We shall see. I am very happy and excited, but also a very scared....
Thank you to everyone. I wish you all the same outcome. I think of all of you, and I hope that one day, all you guys will have a happy ending.
Bless you!
Hope
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