[OldPilot]

Limitless, you scare me! I am in month 9, and I have just been told he wants space, not ready to reconcile that I should let him go, etc...I thought he's be home by Christmas, 2013, not 2023! Help!

Are you familiar with the Stockdale principle?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Stockdale

All of the POWs that had dates in mind died!  See above.

[in it]

Stockdale then added:

This is a very important lesson. You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end—which you can never afford to lose—with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be."[12]

[Searching4Answers]

REPLAY starts when MLCer become disconnected from the WORLD, and start to run from own shadow. How can do it ? Only if FOG exists, fantasy world, he enter into tunnel. That point in MLCer path for majority LBS-es is still undetectable.

What majority LBS must recognize is bomb drop. It is literally BOOOOM !

I guess I can safely assume that my H is in the tunnel; he made this comment recently regarding when he spends time with OW "it is a vacation from reality" 

[Albatross]

REPLAY starts when MLCer become disconnected from the WORLD, and start to run from own shadow. How can do it ? Only if FOG exists, fantasy world, he enter into tunnel. That point in MLCer path for majority LBS-es is still undetectable.

What majority LBS must recognize is bomb drop. It is literally BOOOOM !

I guess I can safely assume that my H is in the tunnel; he made this comment recently regarding when he spends time with OW "it is a vacation from reality" 

Indeed, how they can otherwise being young again ? Only in the fantasy world. IMHO they live actually in reality but modified it in their heads like they wanna so. They act as teenagers they have cloths which is not suitable for their age, they living "life" by own rules. 

[Snowdrop]

This was after I was kindly told I didn't do it for him anymore, didn't find me attractive, even though I looked great? Mad stuff!

I'm sure you looked fab and he thought that too, but who cares what he thought.  It might have hurt that he didn't notice, but don't look fab for him and look for a reaction to see if he notices, or sees "what he is missing", look fab for YOU

[Snowdrop]

It's quite obvious really...If they are incapable of feeling the unconditional love they have for their own children how on earth can they feel any love of any kind?

Guess I'm slow, as while I believed and thought that deep down, it clicked when I saw it written, not so obvious to me, I guess

[PatienceGalore]

Snowdrop, yes from now on , for me, and if he notices, well he'll realise maybe what he is missing!
InIt and OP, I will stop looking for an end date! I did 3 months, then 6, then said I would not go past 9 months, and now I think, maybe I'll last up to a year...in fact from talking with him and observing how little changed between BD and now (nearly 9 months), I cannot possibly expect anything between now and Christmas (3 months) so I shall stay in my little space, no dates!
Thank you for the Stockdale link.

[Snowdrop]

PG

Remember him poking out of your stocking.....but Christmas of which year?

If replay is at least 2 yrs, and more, and there's a ton of things to do once that is over, thats a long time.  For some,  I guess it still never happens.  Sad eh?

Don't leave him a turkey dinner warming in the oven

[in it]

Hey..I'm getting ready with that "well placed" turkey baster full of mashed potatoes..and a "Merry Christmas" card from the Troopers! 

[PatienceGalore]

Turkey?? He'll be lucky if he gets any stuffing! sadly, he won't be part of the celebrations this year. I don't do "playing happy families", we either are or we are not. Too traumatic for the children and I find it impossible. I can see him on my own, but any family setting is too much for my heart and my sanity. It usually ends badly, and the children are very uncomfortable...