[Thunder]

I remember holding the phone away from my ear and looking at it     

In it, that's about all you can do.  Disbelief.  Must have been the phone line.  He couldn't possibly have said that.  LOL

[Rosebud]

My H has done some very strange things like taking some motorbike gear that belonged to me without asking and giving them to OW to wear. I nealy fell over backwards one day when I saw OW riding pillion with my H dressed as me. Also H spent ages researching urban chickens, bought 4 of them a new family addition, spent a fortune on a fancy hen house and then left about 4 weeks later gave me the speech leaving them behind for me to take care of (and I hadn't wanted them in the first place).

[Symptomoftheuniverse]

Five months after BD, my ex W who was the bread winner decided we needed new phones. We went to Verizon, got shiny new iPhones, signed a two year deal at $160 per month then 6 days later she had me served with divorce papers. Fast forward 14 months post D, she comes over one day and says "my phone has been acting up", "I'm thinking about going in and getting US new phones and a new contract". US?! I wanted to ask why she just doesn't go with OM and get a contract together, but just chuckled to myself instead.She ended our relationship of 27 years, forced the sale of our home, and immediately changed back to her maiden name despite having a nine year old son, BUT wants to share a phone plan that she plans to continue paying in full?

[Airmid]

I am getting my daily chuckles from reading this thread!

[in it]

US??   No kidding?? They cannot seem to LET GO for some reason.

The word "we" used to give me hope in an email. Forget that! It didn't exist.

[toysaplenty]

After my MLC'r left and moved straight into his mom's house, he said he is happier now because he can breathe so much better, that our house makes it difficult for him to breathe, that there is something wrong with the air in our house he said. This from a man who chain smokes 2-3 packs a day. Hmm, perhaps you can breathe better at your mom's house because she is on oxygen and you are not allowed to smoke in her house? Just a thought there Mr. MLC'r... Or another favorite of mine, was, you and I get along like best friends not like a married couple. What??? Ok, so you would rather be with the OW who is NOT your best friend? Isn't that what marriage is, two best friends who get along so well they can have a happy marriage?? Or my personal favorite is, "we have had an amazing 20 years together and now I want a completely different 20 years"... Soooo, you want an un-amazing next 20 years? Ok, off you go then... Or then there's the ever popular, "I don't want to be married. I'm never getting married again. But when I get remarried, I'm going to tell my second wife that you are my first wife and I have to take care of the house and yard. If my second wife can't understand that, then I won't marry her". Nonsense, complete nonsense I tell you. Or then there's the, "I am closing our joint bank account, as I want to take care of my own money from now on". So he closes our joint account. Then he shows up at the house and gives me $600 to pay his truck payment for him. I said, your truck payment is $700. He says, can you throw in the $100? I said no, I don't have it. In actuality I did have it, but I'll be damned if he is going to move his OW in with him and his mom and then want me to handle his bills. So, he says, well, here's $600 pay what bills you can. So I paid my car payment (the car was in his name anyway) and the gas bill for the house. He then leaves for an expensive getaway weekend with his OW. The weekend of our wedding anniversary. He returns from his OW weekend screaming at me cause I did not pay his truck payment, then breaks my nose. At the time this crap was going on, I did not find it funny, but 2 years later here I sit laughing my ass off writing this nonsense. Or many people on the forums favorite, he had his lawyer send a letter to me demanding that I turn over all the extension cords in the house. I may actually frame that one and hang it up, as it is so spectacular. When and if he ever comes out of this crisis and graces my doorstep claiming he does not recall this nonsense, I am going to direct him to the framed picture of his lawyer demanding all the extension cords in the house. I may even title my book, "I demand that you turn over all the extension cords in the house". I feel that will be catchy. I was thoroughly expecting a demand notice for the nails in the walls, but I sadly did not receive it...LOL LOL

[toysaplenty]

I became friends with the OW's ex-husband. I actually revenge dated him for 2 months but that is another story, LOL. Her ex-husband told me that when he was married to her they were planning on going to a wedding in Michigan, they live in Ohio. They got all dressed up, loaded the car, and as they were backing out of the driveway, a car pulled up and served him with divorce papers. Oddly, they went to the wedding together anyway  He had to drive 3 hours to Michigan to this wedding knowing that he had just been served divorce papers. Um, yeah, I think my MLCr's OW is just as bat $h!te crazy as he is. Isn't that what they say, that many times the OW is also in MLC? Yeah well they're married to each other now. Good luck with that insanity. As much as I miss the husband I knew, I thank God every day that he vanished and I do not have to mentally deal with this insane drama. You never hear about normal divorces and these antics, you only hear about this kind of craziness from families who have a drug addict family member.

[toysaplenty]

Another good one was when he said, you need to go out and find someone else. Make sure you find someone who is handy like me though. And when you find someone, then we can all go out on a double date!

[toysaplenty]

Ha! I love this thread, I could go on and on - and apparently I am! So, the OW divorced her husband as I had mentioned above. So her ex husband meets this stripper who was down on her luck. Chuckle. Chuckle. And he moves the stripper into his house to help her out. So the OW then starts coming over to his house every day because she is jealous of the young beautiful stripper. She then starts lying and telling everyone that the stripper was so taken by her that she wanted to be a lesbian with her. HA! And the funny thing is, my MLCr said to me, yeah my OW is so beautiful that a stripper wanted to be a lesbian with her. He had no idea that I knew the truth. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE? I feel mentally raped by this nonsense, LOL.

[toysaplenty]

Ok, so this is not something weird the MLC'r did, but it's funny so I shall drop it here. During this whole mess, I went out to a bar with a friend. I met these two guys sitting on the patio. They were funny and we hit it off as friends. My house is set up like party central so they came over every weekend to hang out. I ended up giving one of them, who had the same first name as my husband, (how bizarre) my husband's clothes. I was going to pitch them, but this guy said he'd wear them, so I gave them to him. So this guy puts on one of the husband's extremely rare Speed Racer tshirts one night and goes out to the bars by himself. WHO is in the bar? My husband! Husband walks up to the guy and says, man I love your shirt, are you a Speed Racer fan? And the guy says yeah, and they proceed to talk about Speed Racer. Next day this guy calls me and tells me the whole story. Can you imagine? There's a guy in a bar, with the same first name as my husband, wearing my husband's clothes, standing there talking to my husband. And husband has NO CLUE it's his shirt. It doesn't get any better than this people. Maybe another catchy title could be, "Hey, are you wearing my shirt?" LOL