[honour]

Just nice to get a blokes perspective sometimes.

To think I thought my h loved getting me flowers and things on Valentines, gutted lol.

Please some guy tell me they liked to!!!!! any brave ones?

Restore me some faith or my next Valentine might end up in the toilet.

No, I didn't much enjoy buying gifts and cards for valentines. I liked to surprise my wife with gifts and surprises at totally random times. To my way of thinking, Valentines was an obligation and expected. Not much of a surprise, and not particularly sincere or special if you have to do it to avoid getting into trouble.

Does the man of my dreams exist,

What are you dreaming?

[nah]

No, I didn't much enjoy buying gifts and cards for valentines. I liked to surprise my wife with gifts and surprises at totally random times. To my way of thinking, Valentines was an obligation and expected. Not much of a surprise, and not particularly sincere or special if you have to do it to avoid getting into trouble.

Agreed, buying me a store bought card b/c society says you have to is nonsense.  If you love me, tell me, or write your own letter.  Purchasing someone else's words does not equal love. 

[Mad Hatter]

I briefly read here sometimes, it is the man cave.

Just nice to get a blokes perspective sometimes.

To think I thought my h loved getting me flowers and things on Valentines, gutted lol.

Please some guy tell me they liked to!!!!! any brave ones?

Restore me some faith or my next Valentine might end up in the toilet.

I dont want to be a man eater, I like nice, I like doors opened for me, I never forget to say thank you and I will never ever have casual sex, well I dont think I will lol, there is a better chance I wont, dont want to end up telling porkies so added that just in case.

Does the man of my dreams exist, I dont want a pretend one!!!!

To be fair I am still married but only just.

No offence guys I know its your thread, interesting though

x

Agree with the others; I didnt like it because I always felt like it was an expectation and the only reason to comply was to avoid the pissy attitude if I didn't! Plus its completely geared for women IMHO. I have always found that frivolous gifts like flowers and cards were a waste of money and candy is just junk. If you want to do something special, then just go on a date night or something special that BOTH of you enjoy!

Not sure what context you were using it but "Dream Man" ranks right up there with "soulmate" and "in love" to me. Might want to think about that!

[Rookie13]

"I enjoy it'.."picking up something special so she feels special"...MeNow, you gotta 'she'? 

I agree Mad H, Most men I know, including myself, felt it is/was 'burdensome' to come up with gifts almost each month for whatever holiday, birthday, etc.

I honestly don't know why it felt like this...other than....It was one of many things thrown in my face at BD although I never missed a ONE and actually bought her a gift each day of the month on our 10th anniversary month, which was hard but I did complain from time to time through the years as it seemed whatever I got was either rejected of sorts ( not really appreciated) or the old "you didn't have to" or "you just went out today and got that and didn't put thought into it"...It 'SEEMED" like a no win situation most of the time..

I understand it secures the women's mind to be 'doted upon', but at BD I remember telling my ex when she went on the 'gift' rant "wasn't me coming home every night and having kids with you buying a house and being a good family enough to show my love' (Guess not!, lol) and I also told her "why did I have to prove it through gifts??" 

Anyhow...probably the first couple of years seems to be exciting in the gift giving, especially so I could secure myself with her.. 

[Thundarr]

I'm a weirdo I guess as I used to love buying things and doing things for XW on special occasions and holidays.  She works in an office full of women so getting a bouquet of flowers delivered at work gave her a huge boost as everyone would tell her how lucky she was.  I guess she stopped believing them....

[crazyjourney]

What am I dreaming?

I dont know any more, my husband I guess but he spoilt himself big time.

Your going to crack up at this, Mel Gibson probably my type, but before he went mad too.

I think its the mischievous personality type and look what happens to them, I am not looking, safer to be on my own.

Looks attract you to a person initially but there has to be something else going on dont you think.

I liked Valentines, even if it is commercial, its nice to have a day to bring out the romance in people, a day to be special to each other, of course you can do that any day but life does get busy so its nice that a day brings it to our attention.

So a romantic hunk with a mischievous smile/grin not about to go into mlc please.

Someone that likes giving special gifts, a daisy from the grass will do just fine, its the thought.

Actually a daisy from the grass would be perfect, how romantic is that, would have to be delivered with the killer grin though.

I better stick with the dog, I am getting carried away here.

x

[MyBrainIsBroken]

I guess I'm a weirdo like Thunder.I enjoyed giving my wife gifts and I think I was pretty good at it. Not just for required occasions but occasionally I'd see something I thought she'd like and I'd just buy it for her. Plus I paid for all of the vehicles she drove and for the last 20 years they were all purchased new because she didn't like used. One year I did a twelve days of Christmas thing, giving her a present each of the twelve days leading up to Christmas. Doesn't look like it did me much good, does it? Still, one of the things she took from the house just before I was served with divorce papers was a four foot tall, 30 inches wide oak and glass display cabinet packed full of crystal and glass figurines such as teddy bears holding signs saying I love you and birds kissing that I had given her over the years.

Shortly after BD I gave her a huge bouquet of flowers to apologize for anything I may have done over the years. That's the only time I ever heard her say that I shouldn't have done it, but then she smiled, said they were beautiful, and gave me a hug.

[Rookie13]

T and MBIB,

Your not a wierdo's first of all..Probably your 'wives' appreciated it with a smile every time..

My ex, I feel now, may have 'internally' never felt worthy of such 'showings'..I don't know..It usually wasn't 'oh joy!' when she received things from me..more like a "what did you do now' kinda response...

[Rookie13]

Let me also add,

My ex never saw/experienced the 'gift giving attention' in her family (parents)....She came from an extremely broken one. I think she knew instinctively, or from commercials, books or other women that gifts represented something special but could not feel it.

Her parents never even wrapped their presents at Christmas..just laid them in a pile for each kid..She used to go over board on buying gifts and the wrapping (all the stocking stuff too!) when our kids were young...

[Picton]

For me any gesture no matter how small was foreplay. Didn't matter what day it was on or what it was - anything to show that I was loved and cared for was all that was needed.
Offering to do the school run pretty much guaranteed that my H would get lucky. 

Some of us women aren't as complicated as you men think 

Kia kaha - stay strong