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Did your MLC'er suffer from childhood abuse (physically, emotionally or other)?

Yes
65 (70.7%)
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17 (18.5%)
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Total Members Voted: 92

Author Topic: Discussion Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?

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Discussion Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#90: December 17, 2018, 01:02:56 PM
Hi everyone, MLC is not recognised because it can't be replicated and proved scientificly. Can you imagine trying to recruit a sample of the population who are in crisis to take part in a study. I think there's more of chance in finding a unicorn. There is very little academic evidence that supports MLC.
That's not to say these things don't happen as we know. The problem is science only recognises significant evidence that can be repeated across the population.

I have been studying the menopause/ andropause in heterosexual females/males and it is apparent that females in the 40-60 age group are driving up the divorce rate applications (70%). This is also a time when a lot of females/males are in turmoil with the perimenopause/andropause. This hormonal shift has the ability to increase anger in females/males which might be viewed as monstering. Also the ability in some to change their character and could be related to the MLC Jekyll and Hyde that we see so often complete with severe mood swings and fogged up thinking. The drop in estrogen/testosterone can affect the maternal/paternal instinct and might be related to former doting mothers/fathers not seeming to care about their family as much as before.

The shifting hormones are a sign their reproductive years are coming to an end and might contribute to some trying to validate their sexuality with others in affairs and acting out in the last chance saloon of life. Just my take on things folks.

Your take on this makes perfect sense to me. After losing both of my grandmothers and my mother in law within a few years, my ex and I both went into MLC. in January of 2018, I had what I believe was my first awakening with his 1 st BD happening a few weeks later after his brother tried to commit suicide. About a month later, I started having hot flashes. About 6 months earlier my ex commented about how he thought his testosterone levels were low. Had all the symptoms but the dr blew him off by saying he was to young.
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He moved out May 21,2017
Ow 41( his 1st cousin) moved her in May 23, 2017, she went back to her husband Oct 2017
Ow moved back with her 2 kids Jan 1 2018 even with courts cutting his visitation with his kids because of it
Ow moved out again Dec 2019 and is back with her husband Jan 2020
T-19 yr M-14 yrs
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BD  February 12 2017 & April 22 2017 (signs of MLC since 2015)
I filed for divorce June 2 2017 for protection- final hearing on our 20th anniversary (July 11,2018) divorce was final August 9, 2018

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Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#91: December 17, 2018, 01:32:50 PM
Quote
MLC is not recognised because it can't be replicated and proved scientificly.

I don't think any psychological states/conditions/illnesses can be proven scientifically.  To do that would mean you would have to successfully hold all variables constant except for the one you are trying study.  Can't be done when the variables you need to hold constant are contained within a unique and unpredictable human being.  Most knowledge on psychological conditions are done by clinical study and evaluation.  Even then they are only theories and can be tossed aside over time as more knowledge is gained.  (eg. Freud, Jung, and other former psychology giants).

MLC is actually a cluster of separate conditions rather than just one self contained condition. (Narcissism, depression, etc).  It's why MLC has many similarities but also why it's not an identical experience from one MLCer to another.   

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Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#92: December 17, 2018, 01:44:17 PM
Hi OHM, thank you for your reply. There are a great deal of similarities between the hormones at play and MLC behaviours such as being more self absorbed to the point of selfishness as the individual tries to self regulate. A lot depends on knowledge during this time and what symptoms to expect and I guess for most people hot flushes are a dead give away a major transitions happening. I would imagine an introspective person would experience awakening sooner due to their personality type and their search for answers to their out of character behaviours. Many spouses hate and blame their partners during this period for seemingly trivial behaviours they once thought nothing of and can get very very upset.

I think all of us from birth should be supplied with a manual with a trouble shooting guide hehe. I for one could do with this. It's only through gaining knowledge I have began to understand the emotional feelings I could never invisage as a younger man. I also believe the doctors clinics should be supplying information freely at this turbulent time. I write this as a LBS not to condone mlcers behaviour but to try and rationalise the "why". If you or anyone else has more thoughts on this subject I'm all ears.
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Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#93: December 17, 2018, 01:59:27 PM
Hi Anon, yes constant variables are difficult to lock down and you have more chance in finding the unicorn. Without this MLC may never be identified scientifically but I think a thematic analysis would reveal a number of similarities between MLC and menopause/andropause behaviours. The dialog we make on this site identifies so many common themes that are similar. But consider other conditions of the mind in the DSM. They can't be seen but they can be evaluated and a diagnosis made.
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Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#94: December 17, 2018, 03:13:51 PM
MLC is actually a cluster of separate conditions rather than just one self contained condition. (Narcissism, depression, etc).  It's why MLC has many similarities but also why it's not an identical experience from one MLCer to another.
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Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#95: December 17, 2018, 03:15:03 PM
Considering several MLCers are younger than 40. Also, my peri-menopause come years after my MLC.

I am certain MLC has to do with depression, just woudn't be so sure it is connected with menopause/andropause for every MLCer.

Psychology theories cannot be replicated and proved scientificly. That is why psychology is not a science. Yet, there is no shortage of LBS, and other people, seeing therapists and believe in their theories.

Even medicine is not a science.

"But consider other conditions of the mind in the DSM. They can't be seen but they can be evaluated and a diagnosis made." sure, but they are not science. MLC can also be evaluated and a diagnose made. We all manage to recognise the signs. That is evaluate and made a diagnose.

Psychiatric illnesses are a grey area. Are they really what we think they are? Most likely not. The views on mental illnesses has been changing. Also, DMS is not used everywhere in the world. Mental illness tends to be diagnosed without blood, neurological and other tests. No other area of medicine gets away with that way of doing things.
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Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#96: December 17, 2018, 04:08:45 PM
I'm not sexist necessarily. But because most Dr's are men and this seems to effect men quite a bit more. Or seems to be.
My theory:

The whole thing goes underground because there couldn't possibly be anything wrong with them ( meaning men) . So medically they won't recognize it.

They (for years) focus on us and our "female" problems hormones,  menopause etc ..everybody has not one problem talking about that. Including us.

But when it comes to men..gee can't talk about depression ED and a host of other things. Threatens their masculinity or something. Guess they think it makes them look weak.
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Don't ask why someone is still hurting you; ask why you keep letting them.What you allow continues.

At some point you have to get sick of going through the same sh!t.

Women are NOT rehabilitation centers for badly raised men. It is not your job to fix ,parent, raise or change him.
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Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#97: December 17, 2018, 04:17:27 PM
Here there are more female than male doctors. Same with medicine students, more women than men. At least here, that is not the reason.

Thirty or so years ago there were more male doctors, but it has been decades things changed.

And, at least here, men talk about their issues, including depression. Not all men, of course, but more and more do.
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Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#98: December 17, 2018, 04:55:44 PM

This hormonal shift has the ability to increase anger in females/males which might be viewed as monstering. Also the ability in some to change their character and could be related to the MLC Jekyll and Hyde that we see so often complete with severe mood swings and fogged up thinking. The drop in estrogen/testosterone can affect the maternal/paternal instinct and might be related to former doting mothers/fathers not seeming to care about their family as much as before.

The shifting hormones are a sign their reproductive years are coming to an end and might contribute to some trying to validate their sexuality with others in affairs and acting out in the last chance saloon of life. Just my take on things folks.

Jackolar

You have certainly hit the nail on the head for me.  Ironically after BD my H went for medical tests due to his depression.   He was diagnosed with extremely low testosterone.  I am unsure what he did to rectify this (if anything), but if he was on any medication it certainly did not help with his personality change, monstering, abandonment of his beloved kids, and his Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde personality transition.
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Re: Why isn't MLC recognised medically and in society?
#99: December 17, 2018, 05:11:55 PM
There will always be outliers with the ages of MLC. The same applies with menopause/ andropause and is another similarity. In my sergery the majority of doctors are females with a rushed 10 minute appointment if your lucky. I was diagnosed a few years ago with gout and an observant podiatrist on my hospital appointment recommended an MRI which discovered I had advanced Charlotte foot and several fractured bones. So much for the doctors diagnosis. They have introduced a lady well being coordinator in my surgery but the services only signpost you to other organisations which do not offer counselling, only community based events to attend.

The whole system is poor in dealing with the prevention of emotional problems developing. Once diagnosed treatment waiting times are very long. The medical profession do not seem concerned about MLC, it would seem many don't believe it exists at all. What would it take to change their minds? And can it be better explained by other phenomena.
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