[UrsaMajor]

I would ask the bursar for more time instead of adding to credit card debt. You can explain your situation and make your share of the contribution.

I agree with this. A member here (Watcher) went this route as well and paid his part of the tuition directly to the school while his MLCxW farfed around and didn't because she went tot eh Casinos instead. In the end, he was clear but she had problems. If your part is paid and it is documented, then you are in good shape if push comes to shove. Paying 19%plus on a CC debt is NOT a good way to fund an education....

[Lostinthewoods]

Thank you for your responses. Like treasure advised I have not said anything to him. Just maintained stone silence, did not respond to his message.just let it go. I have months time to pay and I have my money with me , I can pay from the money I'm putting aside for retirement  i started working only 2 yrs qgo, my previous earnings were spent for the house etc.) but I want to hold him accountable for the fees, if he wants to use his CC , so be it not my problem. It's his to figure it out.

[Treasur]

Is the Cc just in his name?

[Lostinthewoods]

Yes it is in his name , it's not joint, in fact none of the banking  are joint.

[UrsaMajor]

Yes it is in his name , it's not joint, in fact none of the banking  are joint.

[Lostinthewoods]

Every time we tried to make it a joint account somehow it did not work, I used to have his passwords and manged all the finances till he went bonkers and changed the passwords ,
now looking it might just be a blessing in disguise.

[in it]

Yes there are many blessings in disguise. 

[Nas]

Are you sure it is a “blessing“ in disguise? As soon as you said he went bonkers and changed the passwords, my red flag detector went off. I hope you have talked to a lawyer and have some insight into how to safeguard what is legally yours. And also keep a close watch because, as I know too well, a spouse who has access to all of your information can and will open accounts in just your name for their own purposes. Unfortunately, you can never assume that anything is safe or that normal rules of honesty and ethics are at play here. Please be vigilant when it comes to your financial security.

[Lostinthewoods]

Hi Everyone,
Just updating, he is back home and I don't know why, we continue to maintain our cold war, we do discuss about the house. He is trying to talk a little more than before, does not treat me like I have some communicable disease,  we are just existing. I am not able to be normal with him, I can see he gets irritated that I am not being normal, does not show it openly.
Tries to involve the kids,  nothing deep , just some superficial conversations. This is better than before.

[Lostinthewoods]

On the positive side my son is going to start college this month, I'm hoping he comes out with flying colours. Please keep him in your prayers. Hoping my children will do well. I've become stronger mentally. Let me narrate what happened the day he returned.
Like I had mentioned earlier I did not have any communication with him. Neither did he. The day he was landing he messaged my younger one saying that he will be home by so and so time. Wanted to know what was for dinner. I ordered some food and retired to bed before he came( first time in my life ,  ( I've waited up for him even during his monstering days )  he comes home says hi to the my younger one and sends him up to ask me to come down , I refused and turn around to see him standing in my room , waving and saying hi, hasn't been in my room for almost a year now. He requested to watch a match , finals, we were following the series. I did go and watch the match, no intention of talking or engaging, he gifted me a monitor since my bithday is coming up, ' he said this is your birthdaygift' and I responded with a hmm,  since BD this is again the first time he got a gift from abroad. He also got my favorite chocolates.
I did not engage much and went back to bed soon after the match ended.
This is the story so far