[GottaBeMe]

Although we are not reconciled, my xh has told me this a lot.  As a matter of fact, it has occurred to me lately just how important it seems to him to tell me this over and over, in one fashion or another.  I had the question in my mind just the other day whether he does this to try to ease some of the pain that I felt, or if he's trying to tell me that he was hurting too.  He did indicate that it was torturous, that he couldn't sleep.  He actually said in a text "my consequences for what I've done...I think about you ALL the time".  I wasn't sure how to take that...LOL.  What I don't know, is if he thought of me all throughout, or if it was just in phases. 

Some day I hope to get the answers to some of the questions that I have.  I want it to come from him though with no influence from me, so I'll wait until the timing is right.....if that day ever comes.

[Mamma Bear]

 8)Love Isn't Weakness, My BIL told me yesterday when I went to visit them that "He missed her every day and thought of her and the kids everyday!!"    He told me he's not just saying that. He said he was so mad at the way she "Nagged him" He ran and did this OW crap for 18 mos "Torture,turmoil" He says now "I can't believe I almost lost your sister. I was an a**hole"   well yeah you were.

[Dontgiveup]

In e-mails, my friends ex-wife told him she thought about him often and once e-mailed him that she had dreams about him.

[Mamma Bear]

 MLCer = Teenager Brain=Selfish for now Not our problem. Or is it? Stay strong.

[Mamma Bear]

 Ouch and we'll be fine either way. Mine just called to ask out of the blue if the Ds 9 and 11 could go up North to escape the heat with him. I find out he means him and OW. I calmly walked the tightrope and told him. "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?"   Kids at a motel w H and OW ??but Friday he was rushing to drive me to work. I told him he has all his space and he should stop trying to think of new ways to torture me b/c they weren't working. Told him he was rude and confused. (And I was amazed that I still trusted him and cared so much for him) He listened and was nice. Why not?
   I got the old "I was crying on the couch for 10 years"  Funny I don't really remeber that much!

[Dontgiveup]

I had dinner with my friend and wanted to post because of several confirmations and "steps" of the reconnection process.   As many of your know, my friend's ex-wife has divorced the other man.  She has said told my friend she can't believe she actually married the other man and has felt in a fog the last 3 years.

She has been e-mailing my friend nearly every day for the last 2 weeks.  She lives in a different state (insert your own joke there).  Anyway, she is now asking questions about specific family members and how they perceive her.  I believe (and my friend agreed) she is testing for acceptance.

He said that he believes right now, she is very much looking at him as a friend.  Limitless had a great post about the friends thing with your MLCer in another thread today (I found Limitless' post to be both accurate and humorous).  My friend's ex-wife continues down the road of friendship.....and her e-mails continue to increase in fondness of old memories and the emotional intimacy that her and my friend share.  He said that RCR's article about reconnection is playing out to be true.  He saw pieces of reconnection from her about a year ago.....but this year they continue to be stronger and more specific.

He knows there is quite a way to go yet, and reconciliation is not certain.  He talked to me about at times during the past 3 years wondering if he would be better off in another relationship, but said the more he thought about that, the more he knew that the foundation he shares with his ex-wife is already in place.

My friend says this continues to be the hardest thing he's been through, but said in his experience what we've discussed about the MLC process has been very accurate, and continues to be accurate.

[Mamma Bear]

  Send him on over here DGU

[Dontgiveup]

He knows about this site and we discuss articles, but he is not a big internet user.

[BraveNewWorld]

Hi DGU,
            Thanks for the update about your friend. Hope you're doing well too. You nearly always sound like you are

Please could you point me in the direction of Limitless' post ... I tried searching for it, but couldn't find it easily.

Friendship is a hard thing for me at the moment. I've hardly seen my wife since she left a few weeks ago. She has emailed and called a couple of times, but I find myself without a voice. I'll try to write something about it on my own thread soon. I'm a bit concerned about it to be honest. Time will probably improve things. God knows what my boys make of it all.

BNW

[Dontgiveup]

BraveNewWorld

I am doing fine......like most LBS, I have bits of loneliness and miss my marriage.....but the process continues.

The post from Limitless was today in eternity's thread.