[KeepItTogether]

Fake it 'til you make it, right Zion?  I think that is what I did. And it worked!

Nas--everyone out here has ALL of their Christmas decorations up the day after Halloween. Not me though. Mostly out of laziness.

I bought a pre-lit fake tree and had a service put up my exterior lights too. Initially I did it so then S9 would see everything was as it always was, even if it wasn't. But then he and I started a few new traditions that still stick with us. One thing that was, and remains, different, is that I no longer feel stressed out at the holidays. I just enjoy the moments. This year will be different again though. I am pretty confident that we will be able to adapt though. LBS super strength I suppose.

I am hoping everyone here finds the strength and peace to survive, and even enjoy a few moments, this holiday season. 

[Evermore]

I also pay a service to come put my Christmas lights up

...had a service put up my exterior lights

I never imagined there even was such a thing (Aussie here)! Sounds a great idea though. I have some fairy lights that I bought years ago that every year I say I'm going to put up... but never get around to. I just said the other day to D21 that this year we WILL put them up 

[UrsaMajor]

I never imagined there even was such a thing (Aussie here)! Sounds a great idea though. I have some fairy lights that I bought years ago that every year I say I'm going to put up... but never get around to. I just said the other day to D21 that this year we WILL put them up 

So, your new Christmas tradition is to say that you'll get the lights up and then not getting the lights up?

[Evermore]

I never imagined there even was such a thing (Aussie here)! Sounds a great idea though. I have some fairy lights that I bought years ago that every year I say I'm going to put up... but never get around to. I just said the other day to D21 that this year we WILL put them up 

So, your new Christmas tradition is to say that you'll get the lights up and then not getting the lights up?

Well... I'm not sure that's a NEW Christmas tradition...

You see we also have a tradition that we put the tree/decorations up on D23's BDay (30/11) and take them down on D21's BDay (30/12). But we NEVER do! Hahaha

[Nas]

This used to be my favorite chaotic week of the year. I’d start preparing on Sunday afternoon and be out straight all week but I didn’t mind. I loved it.
I used to know it all by heart but I’ve forgotten most recipes now. I’m thinking I’ll start making just one for myself each holiday. This year, depending, maybe I’ll toss together my famous rainbow chard and butternut squash casserole with goat cheese. I’m okay leaving the past behind, but the food is worth taking along…


https://youtu.be/uv8SF4vZLlc

[Zion]

Nas, please please agree the recipe!!! That sound lovely!

[KeepItTogether]

Yes please Nas--that Rainbow Chard/butternut squash sounds amazing!!!

[Nas]

Yes please Nas--that Rainbow Chard/butternut squash sounds amazing!!!

Sorry, kids, I looked everywhere and my holiday recipes seem to have all gotten lost along the way. I had a million of them, some my own, others passed on from people. No idea where they ended up, but they are gone. I think I probably realized they were gone last year or even before that, but then forgot again. I'd try to recreate it for you but I didn't even try to make it - I know I'm forgetting a few key steps and ingredients. Might be too on the nose to say my lost holiday recipes are a metaphor. I could start a new collection, but, eh...starting over, starting over, starting over, anyone else hear that echo?

I hope everyone who observed the holiday had a good day, or at least a day they got through in whatever way worked. I'm grappling lately with coming to terms with some realities I think I've been deluding myself about, and holiday season is kind of a huge spotlight on it all. My day started okay and later took an unexpectedly somber turn...well, maybe not so unexpected, because truly nothing is unexpected anymore, and maybe 'somber' isn't the exact right word, but maybe truly nothing is the exact right anything and exact right words are increasingly escaping me lately.

I have been volunteering since BD and now it's like the only time I feel useful and acceptable and maybe even worthy. I make sure to sign up far in advance for holidays and it helps me a lot so maybe my volunteering has a selfish bent, but it's my new holiday normal I guess. I realized yesterday that it just felt normal, no longer like it was a fill-in activity to replace what I thought I'd be doing on a holiday.  Just wanted to share that in case it resonates with anyone.


https://youtu.be/Fbg5msYjol8

[FaithWalker]

I think back in December of 2017 I shared some tips on Surviving the Holidays from my DivorceCare booklet I had gotten.

Newbies, feel free to have a read if you'd like.  It starts on page 6 and should be easy to find when scrolling as I put them all in Bold titles with Italics.

https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9588.50

[Nas]

My current work schedule and other challenges just might irreparably break me, but if I stop to rest I’m afraid I’ll never get going again, so instead of napping, I forced myself to put up the Christmas decorations.

I’ve been in a real “efffff it, what’s the point, just throw in the towel” mood. Something about an explosion of holiday decorations changes the whole atmosphere. They absolutely take over the whole room so it’s almost like a change of scenery, and a change of scenery is always healing.

So for now when I contemplate packing it in, there’s an absurdly large Santa looming behind me, practically taunting me: “don’t you dare give up or you’ll never get off the naughty list.”

The point of this post: twinkling lights make even the bleakest things look a little better. I’m glad I decorated. It helps.

🎶  https://youtu.be/i3RRP3rY9mU  🎶