[How long have you and your spouse been together/married]

How long have you and your spouse been together/married

5-10 years

8 (7.2%)

10-15 years

11 (9.9%)

15-20 years

35 (31.5%)

20-25 years

24 (21.6%)

25-30 years

19 (17.1%)

Over 30 years

14 (12.6%)

Total Members Voted: 111

[Tyks]

Together 22 years. Met when we were 25 married at 27. Bd was one week after our 20th anniversary.  What a great post.

[POOWOO]

Together 20years married10

[Jah63]

Married 27 yrs,together 31 I was 17 he was 18

[Lisa137]

21 years together
15.5 at BD
D at 16 plus 4 months
H is still in replay

[krathos]

My W and were together 21 years married just short of 12 years at BD.

[maomina]

We were together for 10 years 8 of which we lived together ......his first bd was when s7 was 8 months old he did not leave , second bd may 2013 ....still not postive it s mlc ex was 42 when he left

[hopeandfaith]

At BD we were 18 years together, of which 13 years married.

For the survey wouldn´t know how to reply - should we fill in the how many years we were together or married only?

Hi Lost.  In the cases where people are married, I would record the time married.  I just didn't want to discount those folks that never got married. 

I might be generalising too much but I think there is a feeling of safety which maybe grows into complacency once the relationship changes from dating to married.  Unspoken expectations are more likely to come into play ??

[UnconditionalLove]

Married 31 years and had no idea MLC was headed my way.  He had what I thought a great marriage.  We moved to another state for him to take a. Teaching job and looking back I think he planned or was thinking some sort of exit after we got away from friends.  Then OW came along and it set replay in place.  Now divorce one year and not really sure if they are still together because he moved to the state she is at.  I believe they are not together and I think he's just by himself.  So end of relationship didn't set him forward.  I do think he's in depression and he's still really indifferent about me.  I think he will be lost forever.

[Sahmom]

Together 30 years, married 26 years at BD. My sTbx also said he had been unhappy for 5 years at BD.  3 years have passed since BD and then he wanted a D. Mathematically, 5+3=8, but he called that a decade. Said he had been unhappy for a decade. That was a year ago. Not D yet, still slugging out the D and still at home.

[calamity]

8!!! lbs were married more than 30 years.  And I know of 3 others who don't post any more and some on here who haven't seen this poll!  Who would have believed it?  [rhetorical question].

Sahmom--

My sTbx also said he had been unhappy for 5 years at BD

  Mine said 5 years, then later 10 years, then only for the 1st 5...then I never was happy....it's all nonsense.