[a]

Maybe all these psychological theories are just that theories - poachers, MLC etc, etc.  We will never really know the answers when we try to understand the workings of the human mind by using the limitations of our own human mind. So maybe, just maybe.......the answer can only come from the spiritual/higher self.

http://www.theworkbook.org/text5f.htm

Please listen to video clip is was very enlightening.

moment

[riverbirch]

Very interesting name. Mate poaching!

I know that happened when we were separated in 2004 and he was hell bent on having a revenge affair. The b.... was definitely a mate poacher. She was a lot younger,white trash,three kids not with her,drunk,bar ho. Then during this process I was out of the house and living somewhere else. She tried saying she was pregnant by someone else. I always knew she was trying to move into my life with a house and working guy. She was a vicious person.

[kikki]

Don't think anyone was saying that our MLCers were not responsible for this whole sorry mess superdog.

Thanks for posting that clip Moment. 
Mirrors a lot of what RCR speaks of in her writing too, just from a slightly different angle.

[superdog]

Kiki, my post was in relation to mate poaching. I am saying that its easy enough to work out who is ripe for poaching and who isnt. The tactics would fail at the first hurdle otherwise.

[kikki]

Couldn't agree more superdog.
What's changed though is how frequently this is happening, and the changing societal shift of a shrug of the shoulders and acceptance.

[barbiedoll]

I agree with the thoughts of "predators " and "mate poaching " and knew from the moment I discovered who the OW was that this was part of her ploy. She has done this before .. several times . It is amazing how apparrently naive and stupid in " the ways of some women my husband was ". I thought he could spot or smell " the scent of trash". Turns out I was right , he could sense the willingness, easy " ho in heat " that she was . In his right state of mind ( his words ) he NEVER would have went anywhere near this stench. But his mindset ( or lack of ) knew instinctually that she would allow herself to be a playtoy for a broken man . Sort of like a dog in heat and every male dog in a 2 mile radius can smell or sense this . I have asked my husband why he did not approach any number of other women that come and go from our home and life ( 5 daughters ... there are lots of women that come and go ). He knew who would never sleep with a married man and who would .. not consciously , but I believe certain women have an aura of cheap , easy and deperate . Broken men seem to find these dumpster dames and the game is on .Her purpose is to use her sexual lady bits to provide him the ultimate sexual experience ( believing his wife is a frigid cow ) and hopes it will secure him in some sexual lockdown etc and secures money, vacations, security and basically " my life ".... I belive this 100% in my case . Mate poaching , grabbing a man that has a long long history of faithfullnes, responsibility committment ,extreme hardworker , assets , money etc  and making "him mine " will make some women preform sexually easily, willingly and with great passion blah blah .. we all know great actresses . She forgets so many things ...at 55 years old , there is NO sexual experience he has not already experienced . None . Unless she can turn into a billy goat and he enjoys that . She forgets that 1/2 his financial success /assets etc are MINE .  He will not turn into a liquid asset over night .. guaranteed . Thirdly , he is now old. He has not got another 30 years of career pursuit and climbing the ladder in him. I fact, if she had have " won my husband "... she would be his nurse now , not vacationing in Bora Bora .Many many things she said , prove this theory to me but he saw none of it as he is certifiably brain dead. My husband's affair with this McFling was like number 8 in a line up at McDonald of broken men that want to be serviced  quickly, cheaply , with little effort and no thought to the clean up. Makes him "not so special". He remains 100 % responsible for going near a dumpster in the 1st place ... but she with out question, was a "mate poacher ". An acrobatic , sex bunny hoping for a new car , a new future and my life .. she accomplished none of it . Do, off she will go to do the same with someone else's husband ... mine was stupid enough to be married man number 3 ( she told him that ) . Some women should not be allowed in society as they can cause more pain and emotional devastation than some men that are in prison for life.

[MyBrainIsBroken]

I walked into Walmart last night and a state policeman was taking a young woman out in handcuffs. And what for? Trying to steal some 20 or 30 dollar item? What would somebody be willing to do to get their hands on half of the accumulated assets of 20 or 30 or more years of hard work? Mate poach? There used to be a law against it but most states took the law off the books.

[riverbirch]

Yes mine was willing to go for the white trash the first time. He was reeling from my mess that I did. Perfect for trouble.

I also believe in predators too. Not just mate poachers. In 2003 I was not looking for an affair. I was going through a crisis though. The OM started after me,with the flirting and interest. Why I don't know? Was I giving off some distress pheromone? He was younger,married/ divorcing with a young child. I was no prize. Married,4 kids,just going back into the work field. His wife was beautiful and successful from what I was told. I fell for it though. All the interest at just the right time in my life. When I felt like I lived in a black hole. It ruined my marriage and I believe caused ptsd in my h,leading to this mess now.

[in it]

Yep exow stole from a private home a Dr elderly mother took her jewelry..said the old woman threw it out..yeah sure...the ex finally saw through that and set her up and had her arrested.
after that I guess he thought he was a big undercover cop.
They assume they are dealing with someone as honest as we are. She stole stuff from the house after he moved her in.
After the $h!te I went through I'll have him arrested if he comes near me again.

[Nothing Left to Lose]

The OW that my H is living with was definitely a predator. When I started looking at the phone bills, her number was practically the only number listed under his number. She called him constantly. I never knew he had so much to talk about! Since they are living together, I wonder how that neediness is working out for him? I wonder how great that new piece of a** is now that his boys won't even speak to him? Nothing is ever that good!